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something new

Re: something new

  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    navonaz said:
    I know the majority of brides probably do the something old, something new etc tradition, but I've never wanted to. My family doesn't have a great record with marriages and they have a lot of tough stories from their lives to put it mildly, so I've just always felt like I wanted to start a new line when I marry. Like a whole fresh start with me and my future husband and family, but now I'm getting married and my family is pressuring me to carry family items down the aisle with me. I feel guilty because I know they don't understand why I don't want to and I don't want to hurt anyones feelings, especially my mother, but I just don't want to start my life/marriage with the things from their pasts. I love them but I'm not trying to carry the past with me down the aisle! Do any of you have any advice on this? How can I handle this without coming off as rude or hurtful? Thanks!
    "That is such a kind and generous offer - thank you!  I have opted not to observe this tradition, but I appreciate your thinking of me!"




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  • fairytalelove4fairytalelove4 member
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    Well, I guess I just have a very pushy family haha. I've been asked several times since I got engaged and each time have said I wasn't going to do that tradition but it seems that they really want me to because it continues to be brought up! I suppose I'll just continue saying no, I don't want to do that...
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  • princessleia22princessleia22 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer

    Yeah, you may just need to say no and keep saying no. And then bean dip them. Going into too much detail as to why you don't want to observe it may cause hurt feelings. Like saying, "I don't want your something old because it certainly didn't help your marriage survive", probably won't go over too well.  But, I think it should be fine to tell them you just want a fresh start with your own new traditions.

    My family wasn't pushy on it, and I really didn't even think much of it.  My e-ring belonged to my husbands grandmother, so I had that for old.  Lots of new stuff.  Our wedding color was blue, so I had blue shoes, blue flowers, blue jewelry, and blue sash on my dress. I didn't have anything borrowed. And no penny/six pence in the shoe.  Anything I had that met the tradition would have been included anyway.

    image 

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  • fairytalelove4fairytalelove4 member
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    Thanks for the advice! I'm going to hope it doesn't come up again but stand firm on not doing it, politely lol, if it does :)
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  • chibiyuichibiyui member
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    I don't get the DD?
    image



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  • doeydodoeydo member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    fairytalelove4 said:
    Well, I guess I just have a very pushy family haha. I've been asked several times since I got engaged and each time have said I wasn't going to do that tradition but it seems that they really want me to because it continues to be brought up! I suppose I'll just continue saying no, I don't want to do that...

    fairytalelove4 said:
    Thanks for the advice! I'm going to hope it doesn't come up again but stand firm on not doing it, politely lol, if it does :)
    QFP.
    image
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  • doeydodoeydo member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    image
    image
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