To give some background:
Me and my H met when I was going to school near my hometown and
he lived 45 minutes away near his full-time job. We mainly took turns driving
back and forth, one weekend I would drive up to him the next he would drive
down to me. Sometimes one of us would drive more depending on schedules. About
a year into dating my H decided to look for a house. At this point we were
talking about marriage/our future. We decided to look for a house up by his
work because he is locked into a career there and I would look for a job near
that area (which is close to a major city) upon graduation.
Fast forward a couple years, I graduated, moved in with him
and we got engaged. I know have a job in a suburb (about 30 minutes from our
house and 30 minutes from my parents/hometown). When we started planning the
wedding I looked in our general area and wound up loving a venue about 15
minutes from our house and 30 minutes from my hometown. We got married and are
now thinking about TTC in the not too distant future.
That brings me to my parents. They recently started
commenting/little digs about the fact that I moved away. They think that the
wedding should have taken place in my hometown, as I was the bride and “traditionally
the wedding takes place in the brides hometown” They also expressed that they
never understood why I was “constantly driving up there” when we were dating.
As he was the guy he should have been driving down to me to “pick me up for
dates”.
Lastly, since I have moved 45 minutes away they have only
come up to visit a handful of times. Maybe once to my 4 or 5 times.
I can’t help but get upset when I think about the future
once I have kids and will be a little less willing to make the drive all the
time. My parents are both in good health, have cars and and are in a stable
financial situation (so those aren’t reasons they aren’t driving to me)
I really just think they are resentful that I didn’t remain
in my hometown. In their eyes I should have moved less than 10 minutes from
them so what if my H has an hour commute.
Me and my Mom just had a fight this weekend because she
cancelled a date we had to make cookies at my house after she hadn’t been there
in over 3 months (though I’ve been down to see her several times) because she
was too tired.
I’m not sure what the point of my post is I guess I just
wanted to vent/see if I was being unreasonable.