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Can't decide on maid/matron of honor!

Knottie5410184 Knottie5410184 member
First Anniversary
in Moms and Maids
Hi everyone, Last April I was in my best friend's wedding and I was not her maid of honor. I want her to be in my wedding but I don't know if I said make her my matron of honor or just a bridesmaid. I have some one in mind to be my maid of honor but I feel like my best friend will be so hurt if I make her just a bridesmaid. Help!!
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Re: Can't decide on maid/matron of honor!

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    MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its

    You could have two maids/matrons of honor if you can't choose between your two good friends. 

    Please consider choosing a new screen name so we can get to know you. The Knottie numbers names are so anonymous. Welcome to The Knot and congratulations on your engagement.

                       
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    rcher912rcher912 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    Ehhh, in my experience, MOH vs. BM doesn't make too much of a difference. The important things are a) invites to all the great parties, b) pretty dress, and most importantly c) getting to stand up for your best friend on one of the most important days of her life.

    Go with one, go with two, go with zero, I think you're in the clear any way you slice it.

    Unless, of course, you're only considering not making her your MOH because you weren't hers (not sure why you mentioned that part) - then I'd say you need to let it slide and make her your MOH (or co-MOH), and keep it moving.
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    zitiqueenzitiqueen member
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    Knottie5410184 said:
    Hi everyone, Last April I was in my best friend's wedding and I was not her maid of honor. I want her to be in my wedding but I don't know if I said make her my matron of honor or just a bridesmaid. I have some one in mind to be my maid of honor but I feel like my best friend will be so hurt if I make her just a bridesmaid. Help!!
    Just being nosy -- why don't you want your BF to be your MOH? Or, why do you want somebody who isn't your BF to be your MOH?
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    AddieCakeAddieCake member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Are you looking for payback on the MOH thing?
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
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    vmj23vmj23 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    As other's said, why not have both be MOH's?  Or no maid of honors at all?  We had just bridesmaids/groomsmen - no maid of honor or best man.    It's just a title, they all do the same thing anyway.   
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    peachy13peachy13 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    If you have someone in mind to be your MOH, ask her to be your MOH. Ask your other friend to be a bridesmaid.

    Two things:
    1- I wouldn't use the word "matron." Even if your MOH is married, let's call her your maid of honor. "Matron" is basically calling someone old.
    2- If you got just got engaged and aren't getting married for a while, try to wait before asking everyone to be in your bridal party. I waited until a year before my wedding to ask, but many people on the Knot will say 9 months prior to your wedding is fine. Good luck!
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers


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    IsaL17IsaL17 member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    I'm on the same boat. I couldn't decide. All of my friends are very jealous of each other haha I don't have a specific group of girlfriends, I have them all over, so drama expected :/
    I'm thinking of choosing my best friend since jr high & my best friend since high school (they are still my besties) as my maids of honor. One lives far away so she wont be able to help me until the very day. And also thinking about having my 4 other besties as bridesmaids
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    floridabride44floridabride44 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer
    IsaL17 said:
    I'm on the same boat. I couldn't decide. All of my friends are very jealous of each other haha I don't have a specific group of girlfriends, I have them all over, so drama expected :/
    I'm thinking of choosing my best friend since jr high & my best friend since high school (they are still my besties) as my maids of honor. One lives far away so she wont be able to help me until the very day. And also thinking about having my 4 other besties as bridesmaids
    Does that make her less worthy as a MOH? As long as she shows up on time in the dress you guys decide on that's within everyones budget, she's doing her job. Yes, it's nice if your friends/BMs are excited for your wedding and offer to help you with things, but regardless of what Pinterest tells you, it's not a requirement of being a bridesmaid or MOH. 
    --

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    redoryxredoryx member
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    IsaL17 said:
    I'm on the same boat. I couldn't decide. All of my friends are very jealous of each other haha I don't have a specific group of girlfriends, I have them all over, so drama expected :/
    I'm thinking of choosing my best friend since jr high & my best friend since high school (they are still my besties) as my maids of honor. One lives far away so she wont be able to help me until the very day. And also thinking about having my 4 other besties as bridesmaids
    What sort of help do you actually think is required of her? All she really needs to do is show up in the right dress.
    image
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