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Tiered Receptions + Charging for guest's meals

QueridaSaraQueridaSara member
First Anniversary First Comment Name Dropper 5 Love Its
in Snarky Brides
I entered a contest recently, sponsored by a wedding page.  They posted this gem up today:

It doesn't start too badly.  Until 'reception invitation':

"
Reception invitation
If some guests are to be in­vi­ted to a separate (and more exclusive) reception after the ceremony, then the following information should be included on a separate card:
[...]
• financial contribution for the meal (if applicable)
• dress code or theme
"

Sigh.  I'm pretty grumpy today, so it's probably me.
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Re: Tiered Receptions + Charging for guest's meals

  • larrygagalarrygaga member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited February 2015
    Well, I think it's a great idea.

    I'm 100% snarky and sarcastic. 
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  • floridabride44floridabride44 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer
    edited January 2015
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    There's so much bad advice out there. SO MUCH. 
    --

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  • esstee33esstee33 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    Yeah I'm not sure why this has all of a sudden become a popular thing, but it's gross. 

    Also do you need a thousand sig gifs? It takes up literally my entire laptop screen to scroll past it. And it's awwwwwful on mobile. 
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  • QueridaSaraQueridaSara member
    First Anniversary First Comment Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    Ask, and ye shall receive! :)

    It's down to just one, but I checked the box so you can't see it on mobile.
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  • HaileyDancingbearHaileyDancingbear member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    I don't understand these people.  They insist they're too broke to afford to pay for everyone's meals because money doesn't grow on trees, but they expect their guests and wedding party to shell out money like it DOES grow on trees.  

    So what, do they just think everyone can just pull money out of their ass except them??  
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  • hellohkbhellohkb mod
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    HaileyDancingbear said:
    I don't understand these people.  They insist they're too broke to afford to pay for everyone's meals because money doesn't grow on trees, but they expect their guests and wedding party to shell out money like it DOES grow on trees.  

    So what, do they just think everyone can just pull money out of their ass except them??  
    This! People have this idea that they deserve to have all this money spent because it's their "special day" (that term makes me want to vomit).


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  • dcbride86dcbride86 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer
    I literally don't know what to say,  You don't send people a thank you gift and then ask them to reimburse you for it.  A reception is a thank you.  Why don't people understand that?

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  • OnceUponSnowOnceUponSnow member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited February 2015
    Believe it or not, it's actually a common practice some places in the world. I learned on TK that it was against many cultures' etiquette, but this practice has been in my own family for at least 3 generations. Now if I look at my fiancé's family, who lives hours away from our place (so different region and descent and yada yada), this tradition is well alive for other family events, such as anniversaries and Holiday receptions. We actually received BYOW invitations and financial contribution requests more often than we don't.

    The difference is, for my parents' and grandparents' generations, weddings and family events were modest and the guests offered a contribution as a token of joy and celebration. It's a whole other thing to expect your guests to pay for a lavish event you can't even afford, but I'm afraid this is typical of my generation. It's unfortunate because it takes away the meaning of this tradition, which is a communal celebration (similar to a pot-luck) to entitlement and superficiality.   
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  • esstee33esstee33 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited July 2015
    OnceUponSnow said:

    Believe it or not, it's actually a common practice some places in the world. I learned on TK that it was against many cultures' etiquette, but this practice has been in my own family for at least 3 generations. Now if I look at my fiancé's family, who lives hours away from our place (so different region and descent and yada yada), this tradition is well alive for other family events, such as anniversaries and Holiday receptions. We actually received BYOW invitations and financial contribution requests more often than we don't.


    The difference is, for my parents' and grandparents' generations, weddings and family events were modest and the guests offered a contribution as a token of joy and celebration. It's a whole other thing to expect your guests to pay for a lavish event you can't even afford, but I'm afraid this is typical of my generation. It's unfortunate because it takes away the meaning of this tradition, which is a communal celebration (similar to a pot-luck) to entitlement and superficiality.   
    Just because things are common or "traditional" in your area or social circle doesn't make them not rude. Cash bars are common where I'm from, but they're still rude. Gaps, too. Tradition and etiquette are not the same thing.
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  • theartistformerlyknownastheartistformerlyknownas member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited February 2015
    QueridaSara said:

    Ask, and ye shall receive! :)

    It's down to just one, but I checked the box so you can't see it on mobile.

    FYI checking that hides other people's siggies on YOUR phone, it doesn't hide your signature for everyone else.
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