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(From Reddit) What's the worst thing you've experienced at a wedding?

http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/30d44o/whats_the_worst_thing_youve_witnessed_at_a/

Some of these are GOLDEN. I posted this link in my Weddit fails thread on Snarky Brides, but I think everyone needs to see this. For anyone unfamiliar with the clusterfuck that is reddit, the comments that are most to the left of the page are the original comments and then comments underneath those and indented in are the replies. Have fun!






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Re: (From Reddit) What's the worst thing you've experienced at a wedding?

  • This is hillarious. I'll share mine as I'm not on reddit:

    This wasn't me but happened to one of Fi's friends, I'll call Charles.

    Charles was invited to a wedding with his heavily pregnant wife. They also had a 2 year old. Charles couldn't get childcare, as this was a wedding across the country, so he declined. Groom says lightheartedly "Go ahead and bring toddler, we'd love to see you, as long as you don't mind buying her meal". Charles laughs at the joke and says great.

    They show up at the wedding and at opposite ends of the room are 2 bars with giant signs that say "Fish and Chips £6 or Sausage and Chips £7".... Yes, all guests had to buy their own meals and drinks! After you placed your order, an hour later a guy handed you a polystyrene box with cold food from the naff chippy.  To top it off, this couple hired a mechanical bull, big lawn games and a bouncy castle!
  • Here's mine.

    We recently went to a wedding with the worst toast I've ever heard. The MOH (who was VERY pregnant, so clearly not drunk) rambled on for almost 10 minutes with the most inappropriate speech I've heard in my life. She told stories about how her and the bride in high school would pick guys up at the gas station by putting their legs up on cars and making up fake names. She told a story that I later found out was a secret about how the bride was very upset a few months into the relationship because the groom wouldn't say "I love you." MOH apparently told her she should dump him over it. Then she went on to talk about the groom's nickname ("weasel"). She read the full dictionary definition of "weasel" and went on to give examples of times that the groom had lied to the bride or done things behind her back.

    It was the most uncomfortable 10 minutes of my life. I don't know that the MOH said one single nice thing about the bride OR the groom in her entire speech.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker

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  • Holy crap; the second story in this one is a freaking doozy! The poor bride and groom!
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  • Here's mine.


    We recently went to a wedding with the worst toast I've ever heard. The MOH (who was VERY pregnant, so clearly not drunk) rambled on for almost 10 minutes with the most inappropriate speech I've heard in my life. She told stories about how her and the bride in high school would pick guys up at the gas station by putting their legs up on cars and making up fake names. She told a story that I later found out was a secret about how the bride was very upset a few months into the relationship because the groom wouldn't say "I love you." MOH apparently told her she should dump him over it. Then she went on to talk about the groom's nickname ("weasel"). She read the full dictionary definition of "weasel" and went on to give examples of times that the groom had lied to the bride or done things behind her back.

    It was the most uncomfortable 10 minutes of my life. I don't know that the MOH said one single nice thing about the bride OR the groom in her entire speech.
    And this is what would happen if we give Brad the microphone. 

    Seriously, what the fuck?! 
    image
  • Bride and groom did bouquet and garter toss.  Young teenage girl catches bouquet, skeazy 20-30something friend of groom catches garter.  Skeazy friend puts garter on the poor girl, and cops a feel as he's sliding it up her leg.  Girl freaks and runs off dance floor.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • Bride and groom did bouquet and garter toss.  Young teenage girl catches bouquet, skeazy 20-30something friend of groom catches garter.  Skeazy friend puts garter on the poor girl, and cops a feel as he's sliding it up her leg.  Girl freaks and runs off dance floor.

    At my cousin's wedding, a 20 year old girl catching the bouquet. A 9 year old boy catches the garter. His father tell him what he has to do and shoves him toward the dance floor. The kid burst into tears and ran out of the building.

    Smart kid. 
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  • We actually had a bout of drama at the end of our wedding. At this point, there's only a few of us left and we're all drunk. 

    H's old roommate has this girlfriend we don't really care for. She is very pretentious, a know it all, and has a stick up her ass. Like, she argues with H over literary stuff even though H is an English teacher with a master's and she can't pass a 200 level class to save her life, then she goes on to say she doesn't REALLY need a degree to be the fantastic writer she was born to be. That kind of thing. Anyway, we'll call her Pucker Face. 

    About 6 months before our wedding we were all hanging out with some other teachers.  One is an older teacher, we'll call him Hawaiian Shirt.  He likes to goof off and he is in an especially weird mood because it is the anniversary of his son's death.  Pucker Face says something pretentious, Hawaiian Shirt looks at her and tells her she has very sexy wrists. He goes on like this for a while, telling her she should model her wrists and they are very silky and such.  This is strange, but Pucker Face knows perfectly well that he is harmless and kidding around. She tells him to fuck off and eventually storms away and bitches out her boyfriend for not "standing up for her". 

    So anyway. There was another teacher from that event at our wedding, who similarly likes to mess with people but can be a little bit more tactless. We will call him Neckbeard, because he totally is one even  though he's a good friend of ours. We're all standing around doing shots and stuff, and Neckbeard mentions something about the event.  Pucker Face immediately bitch slaps him, decides the first wasn't enough of a bitch slap, and slaps him again. He dumps his drink in

     her face.  His wife of a month steps in and gets all OH NO YOU DINT in Pucker Face's face.  H has to break it up, while Pucker Face's boyfriend and I just want to curl up like hedgehogs and hide. Bartender stepped in as well, things diffused, Neckbeard and wife went home still all puffed up and the rest of us went bar hopping. Super awkward though because we were just all 

    image

    Except we had cake but it was gone. 
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  • edited March 2015
    OP, I can't get over the MOB getting drunk and falling in the BBQ sauce fountain, in the comments. Dying if laughter.
  • BBQ sauce fountains exist?  Where might these be?  
    Married 9.12.15
    image
  • BBQ sauce fountains exist?  Where might these be?  

    And can the BBQ sauce be replaced with ranch?
  • BBQ sauce fountains exist?  Where might these be?  

    And can the BBQ sauce be replaced with ranch?
    Oooo or maybe a dual one.... ranch and BBQ.  
    Married 9.12.15
    image
  • OP, I can't get over the MOB getting drunk and falling in the BBQ sauce fountain, in the comments. Dying if laughter.

    I read that to one to BF, we laughed our asses off...now he wants a BBQ sauce fountain.

  • hellohkbhellohkb mod
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited March 2015

    This is hillarious. I'll share mine as I'm not on reddit:


    This wasn't me but happened to one of Fi's friends, I'll call Charles.

    Charles was invited to a wedding with his heavily pregnant wife. They also had a 2 year old. Charles couldn't get childcare, as this was a wedding across the country, so he declined. Groom says lightheartedly "Go ahead and bring toddler, we'd love to see you, as long as you don't mind buying her meal". Charles laughs at the joke and says great.

    They show up at the wedding and at opposite ends of the room are 2 bars with giant signs that say "Fish and Chips £6 or Sausage and Chips £7".... Yes, all guests had to buy their own meals and drinks! After you placed your order, an hour later a guy handed you a polystyrene box with cold food from the naff chippy.  To top it off, this couple hired a [b]mechanical bull, big lawn games and a bouncy castle![/b]
    The bolded sounds kind of amazing, the rest sounds like a nightmare.


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