is this weird or rude? or is it great?!

DarthV8r · March 2015

. I would like to have our wedding ceremony in a 18th century chapel. Its kind of pricey. Then immediately after have a backyard wedding reception. Any etiquette flaws or am I OK as long as it is properly hosted? Sorry my tablet is a b

esstee33 · March 2015

ibarfburlapandlace said:
. I would like to have our wedding ceremony in a 18th century chapel. Its kind of pricey. Then immediately after have a backyard wedding reception. Any etiquette flaws or am I OK as long as it is properly hosted? Sorry my tablet is a b

It's OK to have your ceremony almost anywhere you want it and a reception almost anywhere you want it, provided that you're adequately hosting people. This is not enough detail. Are you just asking if it's OK because the ceremony and reception spaces are kind of weird together? Because, yes, it's OK, but it is a little weird to me.

JennyColada · March 2015

esstee33 said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:
. I would like to have our wedding ceremony in a 18th century chapel. Its kind of pricey. Then immediately after have a backyard wedding reception. Any etiquette flaws or am I OK as long as it is properly hosted? Sorry my tablet is a b
It's OK to have your ceremony almost anywhere you want it and a reception almost anywhere you want it, provided that you're adequately hosting people. This is not enough detail. Are you just asking if it's OK because the ceremony and reception spaces are kind of weird together? Because, yes, it's OK, but it is a little weird to me.

Ditto.

Yes, so long as you host your guests properly you can have your reception on the top of Mount Everest or a ceremony on the moon.

Might be expensive though.

Jen4948 · March 2015

JennyColada said:

esstee33 said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:
. I would like to have our wedding ceremony in a 18th century chapel. Its kind of pricey. Then immediately after have a backyard wedding reception. Any etiquette flaws or am I OK as long as it is properly hosted? Sorry my tablet is a b
It's OK to have your ceremony almost anywhere you want it and a reception almost anywhere you want it, provided that you're adequately hosting people. This is not enough detail. Are you just asking if it's OK because the ceremony and reception spaces are kind of weird together? Because, yes, it's OK, but it is a little weird to me.
Ditto.

Yes, so long as you host your guests properly you can have your reception on the top of Mount Everest or a ceremony on the moon.

Might be expensive though.

This exactly. It's certainly not rude if you properly host your guests, but unless you have 18th century architecture or furnishings or something at your home, it could seem odd.

DarthV8r · March 2015

It is weird, right? But I'm in southern California where everything is pricey Also, my backyard is too small for the ceremony and reception. There's not much to choose from for ceremony spots. The only 3 things requested from F.I. was to wear a brown suit, have a backyard reception, and have plenty of booze. All things that I can dig.

ohannabelle · March 2015

I like the unusual. It wouldn't bother me a bit. As long as you're a considerate hostess, I have no complaints. I'd probably find it kind of amusing and charming.

As long as I have a chair for my ass, you're not sun roasting me or chilling me, I have adequate food and beverage for whatever time of day, it's a reasonable travel time between wedding and reception, and clean restrooms are available, sure, then the place works, whatever the place is.

It doesn't matter if you veer off traditional paths, as long as you treat your guests well.

manateehugger · March 2015

Our ceremony was in a old Lutheran church and our reception was in a children's museum - I climbed a bean stalk in my wedding dress.

Host everyone properly, and it sounds like you've got a great wedding in the making.

theartistformerlyknownas · March 2015

Seating, food safety and bathrooms would be my only concerns, but those are more with the reception space and not the ceremony. Wouldn't bother me a bit if the ceremony and reception spaces didn't "match," as long as the hosting was complete.

DarthV8r · March 2015

lolo883 said:
Seating, food safety and bathrooms would be my only concerns, but those are more with the reception space and not the ceremony. Wouldn't bother me a bit if the ceremony and reception spaces didn't "match," as long as the hosting was complete.

All valid points. 50 guests or less, professionally catered, 2 bathrooms , the bar and lounge in the sunroom which connects to the backyard.

Maggie0829 · March 2015

Are you able to fully host all your guests properly and afford the chapel? If so, then go for it.

As long as the reception area can comfortably fit 50 guests and you have enough seating for everyone then you should be good to go.

DarthV8r · March 2015

Properly hosted = no gap, reception is 13 min away from chapel, a seat for every ass for ceremony and reception, cocktail hour with sandwiches or crackers and cheese or something at reception venue , dinner during dinnertime, fully hosted bar, cake for all.

I am still very early in planning but so far is this right? I want to make sure I have my ducks in a row.

Maggie0829 · March 2015

ibarfburlapandlace said:
Properly hosted = no gap, reception is 13 min away from chapel, a seat for every ass for ceremony and reception, cocktail hour with sandwiches or crackers and cheese or something at reception venue , dinner during dinnertime, fully hosted bar, cake for all.

I am still very early in planning but so far is this right? I want to make sure I have my ducks in a row.

Yup.

If you can't afford a full bar you can always do limited (beer, wine, sig drink) or you don't have to have alcohol at all if you can't afford or want it. If your wedding is at 2pm then you can have a nice cake, punch, and small app reception instead of a full meal but if your ceremony falls around lunch or dinner time a full meal is needed.

But the most important is having cake for everyone because cake

theartistformerlyknownas · March 2015

ibarfburlapandlace said:
Properly hosted = no gap, reception is 13 min away from chapel, a seat for every ass for ceremony and reception, cocktail hour with sandwiches or crackers and cheese or something at reception venue , dinner during dinnertime, fully hosted bar, cake for all.

I am still very early in planning but so far is this right? I want to make sure I have my ducks in a row.

Sounds good!

If the house is in the country (on a septic system) or old (old plumbing) I'd be worried about bathrooms being able to handle 50 people, and would suggest looking into nice trailer port-a-johns. But I've had 50 people at my house for parties and the bathrooms survived just fine.

DarthV8r · March 2015

I was just looking into it because the more you drink the more you have to urinate. An extra commode sounds like a great idea.

lovegood90 · March 2015

With the extra details you provided, it sounds like you're good!

Viczaesar · March 2015

ibarfburlapandlace said:
Properly hosted = no gap, reception is 13 min away from chapel, a seat for every ass for ceremony and reception, cocktail hour with sandwiches or crackers and cheese or something at reception venue , dinner during dinnertime, fully hosted bar, cake for all.

I am still very early in planning but so far is this right? I want to make sure I have my ducks in a row.

Just because I'm curious, is the chapel at one of the Missions? What other 18th century chapels are there in Southern California?

rcher912 · March 2015

Sounds like you're on the right track to me! Also sounds like a lovely event.

DarthV8r · March 2015

Viczaesar said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:
Properly hosted = no gap, reception is 13 min away from chapel, a seat for every ass for ceremony and reception, cocktail hour with sandwiches or crackers and cheese or something at reception venue , dinner during dinnertime, fully hosted bar, cake for all.

I am still very early in planning but so far is this right? I want to make sure I have my ducks in a row.
Just because I'm curious, is the chapel at one of the Missions? What other 18th century chapels are there in Southern California?

juniper serra is from the 18th century, st. Francis chapel in the museum of man was built in the early 1900's. But the more I look at my budget the more I'm leaning towards having a wedding in a park. Even though the chapels are gorgeous, I can save 800 dollars.

esstee33 · March 2015

ibarfburlapandlace said:
It is weird, right? But I'm in southern California where everything is pricey Also, my backyard is too small for the ceremony and reception. There's not much to choose from for ceremony spots. The only 3 things requested from F.I. was to wear a brown suit, have a backyard reception, and have plenty of booze. All things that I can dig.

Forgive me if this is a hella dumb question, 'cause I've been drinking for several hours now, but if your backyard is too small for the ceremony + reception, how is it big enough for just the reception? IME, all you have to do is rearrange where the chairs are.

DarthV8r · March 2015

esstee33 said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:
It is weird, right? But I'm in southern California where everything is pricey Also, my backyard is too small for the ceremony and reception. There's not much to choose from for ceremony spots. The only 3 things requested from F.I. was to wear a brown suit, have a backyard reception, and have plenty of booze. All things that I can dig.
Forgive me if this is a hella dumb question, 'cause I've been drinking for several hours now, but if your backyard is too small for the ceremony + reception, how is it big enough for just the reception? IME, all you have to do is rearrange where the chairs are.

esstee33 said:

esstee33 said:
If you mean have the ceremony on the dance floor , it can happen. However, I wanted an aisle in a traditionally set up wedding ceremony. That is what I have visioned in my head. Anyway, I am super excited because I found a really close church that we can rent and have the minister marry us for a great price! It is a beautiful church with a perfect location. Thanks for helping everyone.

[Deleted User] · March 2015

esstee33 said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:
It is weird, right? But I'm in southern California where everything is pricey Also, my backyard is too small for the ceremony and reception. There's not much to choose from for ceremony spots. The only 3 things requested from F.I. was to wear a brown suit, have a backyard reception, and have plenty of booze. All things that I can dig.
Forgive me if this is a hella dumb question, 'cause I've been drinking for several hours now, but if your backyard is too small for the ceremony + reception, how is it big enough for just the reception? IME, all you have to do is rearrange where the chairs are.

Yes, but unless you hire people to help you move your chairs, you shouldn't ask your guests to help you move chairs because they shouldn't be working at your wedding. So, yeah, this makes sense, not to be able to have enough space for two totally separate setups.

OP, glad you found a church you like. Sounds lovely.

[Deleted User] · April 2015

Not rude, the style of the venues don't compliment each other very well. To me an 18th century church seems very formal (I have a big traditional church with stained glass windows and marble fixtures, very ornate design pictured in my head). Now if I'm wrong and the is a smaller simpler style of church, I think the venues would compliment each other nicely. In the end, do what feels right for you and works for your budget.

Viczaesar · April 2015

ibarfburlapandlace said:

Viczaesar said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:
Properly hosted = no gap, reception is 13 min away from chapel, a seat for every ass for ceremony and reception, cocktail hour with sandwiches or crackers and cheese or something at reception venue , dinner during dinnertime, fully hosted bar, cake for all.

I am still very early in planning but so far is this right? I want to make sure I have my ducks in a row.
Just because I'm curious, is the chapel at one of the Missions? What other 18th century chapels are there in Southern California?
juniper serra is from the 18th century, st. Francis chapel in the museum of man was built in the early 1900's. But the more I look at my budget the more I'm leaning towards having a wedding in a park. Even though the chapels are gorgeous, I can save 800 dollars.

...so is it at one of the Missions? I don't understand what you're saying. I know when Junipero Serra lived, which is why I asked if the location you're looking at is at one of the Missions. Early 1900s is 20th century, and I don't know which Museum of Man you're talking about. What city are we talking about here?

DarthV8r · April 2015

Viczaesar said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:

Viczaesar said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:
Properly hosted = no gap, reception is 13 min away from chapel, a seat for every ass for ceremony and reception, cocktail hour with sandwiches or crackers and cheese or something at reception venue , dinner during dinnertime, fully hosted bar, cake for all.

I am still very early in planning but so far is this right? I want to make sure I have my ducks in a row.
Just because I'm curious, is the chapel at one of the Missions? What other 18th century chapels are there in Southern California?
juniper serra is from the 18th century, st. Francis chapel in the museum of man was built in the early 1900's. But the more I look at my budget the more I'm leaning towards having a wedding in a park. Even though the chapels are gorgeous, I can save 800 dollars.

...so is it at one of the Missions? I don't understand what you're saying. I know when Junipero Serra lived, which is why I asked if the location you're looking at is at one of the Missions. Early 1900s is 20th century, and I don't know which Museum of Man you're talking about. What city are we talking about here?

The chapel is in the junipero serra museum in San diego. It's not a mission. The museum of man is in San Diego and there is a chapel built inside of it. Called the St. Francis chapel.

Viczaesar · April 2015

ibarfburlapandlace said:

Viczaesar said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:

Viczaesar said:

ibarfburlapandlace said:
Properly hosted = no gap, reception is 13 min away from chapel, a seat for every ass for ceremony and reception, cocktail hour with sandwiches or crackers and cheese or something at reception venue , dinner during dinnertime, fully hosted bar, cake for all.

I am still very early in planning but so far is this right? I want to make sure I have my ducks in a row.
Just because I'm curious, is the chapel at one of the Missions? What other 18th century chapels are there in Southern California?
juniper serra is from the 18th century, st. Francis chapel in the museum of man was built in the early 1900's. But the more I look at my budget the more I'm leaning towards having a wedding in a park. Even though the chapels are gorgeous, I can save 800 dollars.

...so is it at one of the Missions? I don't understand what you're saying. I know when Junipero Serra lived, which is why I asked if the location you're looking at is at one of the Missions. Early 1900s is 20th century, and I don't know which Museum of Man you're talking about. What city are we talking about here?
The chapel is in the junipero serra museum in San diego. It's not a mission. The museum of man is in San Diego and there is a chapel built inside of it. Called the St. Francis chapel.

Okay, so it's not actually an 18th century chapel, it's a 20th century chapel (built in 1915). I've been there, actually; it's lovely. It was not built inside the Museum of Man, though, it's across the street from the main MOM building.

is this weird or rude? or is it great?!

Re: is this weird or rude? or is it great?!

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