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Vent: Guest Drama, Discovering Awkwardness, and a bonus minor pity party

[Deleted User][Deleted User] member
5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
in Snarky Brides
'Morning! Or afternoon, depending where I find you on this fine day?

When invitation time came, FH and I were collecting addresses. We made a night of it, got a bottle of wine and split the list up. It was fun, until I came across a couple, mutual friends of ours. Both FH and I are more.. in touch...I guess you'd say, with "Rob". His wife "Sue" is one that will suddenly drop contact with the world, and no one quite understands why. Anyways, I noticed a while back, Sue too me off all forms of social media. No big deal, this happens often, so I carry on with life. When it came time to send invitations, Sue adds me back, so I decide to be proactive and ask her for their address.

"Rob's address is still XYZ Street in Citytown, but I currently don't have an address."

Oh shit. I found out about a separation by inviting them to a wedding. This is awkward. What do I even say? I kind of left it in her court to get me the address when she can, and stepped away from the invites thing for a few minutes.

On another page, I have adult guests acting stupid. "Are you inviting so and so?" "I'm not coming if THEY are invited!" "Do I have to sit with *insert name here* because we are having ISSUES."

Oyyy. Really? I'm trying to do my best to diffuse, but seriously, can't you deal with some of this stuff on your own?

Bonus pity party: My car is being a little bitch and demanding repairs at the most inconvenient time. Come on, car. I have vendors to visit and money to give them... Why do you have to do this now? 

I know. Life doesn't stop because we are planning a wedding. But now that I've had my little internet rant, I feel better. Time to carry on!


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Re: Vent: Guest Drama, Discovering Awkwardness, and a bonus minor pity party

  • NowIAmSypNowIAmSyp member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    purplepinkcupcake said:

    'Morning! Or afternoon, depending where I find you on this fine day?

    When invitation time came, FH and I were collecting addresses. We made a night of it, got a bottle of wine and split the list up. It was fun, until I came across a couple, mutual friends of ours. Both FH and I are more.. in touch...I guess you'd say, with "Rob". His wife "Sue" is one that will suddenly drop contact with the world, and no one quite understands why. Anyways, I noticed a while back, Sue too me off all forms of social media. No big deal, this happens often, so I carry on with life. When it came time to send invitations, Sue adds me back, so I decide to be proactive and ask her for their address.

    "Rob's address is still XYZ Street in Citytown, but I currently don't have an address."

    Oh shit. I found out about a separation by inviting them to a wedding. This is awkward. What do I even say? I kind of left it in her court to get me the address when she can, and stepped away from the invites thing for a few minutes.

    On another page, I have adult guests acting stupid. "Are you inviting so and so?" "I'm not coming if THEY are invited!" "Do I have to sit with *insert name here* because we are having ISSUES."

    Oyyy. Really? I'm trying to do my best to diffuse, but seriously, can't you deal with some of this stuff on your own?

    Bonus pity party: My car is being a little bitch and demanding repairs at the most inconvenient time. Come on, car. I have vendors to visit and money to give them... Why do you have to do this now? 

    I know. Life doesn't stop because we are planning a wedding. But now that I've had my little internet rant, I feel better. Time to carry on!


    Ouch- that is awkward...  I think I can beat you though :)

    When I worked in hotels and ran weddings for the hotel, I once called one of my couples WHILE they were breaking up.  I was calling to talk menu, and she had to tell me she thought they were breaking up....  talk about awkward.  Why she even answered the phone during such a crazy sad conversation, I still don't understand! 
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  • Cookie PusherCookie Pusher member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Yea, we found out more details than we care to know about one of our guests' desire to divorce their cheating spouse (but wanting THEM to pull the trigger for financial reasons of some sort) after sending out our invitations. Super awkward phone call.
    ~*~*~*~*~

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  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    That is totally awkward. Ugh.

    I recently ran into a friend of a friend and asked her how her husband was doing. And she said, "I'm getting divorced!". Whoops. I felt so bad.
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  • larrygagalarrygaga member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Since we are sharing awkward stories, one of my friends in college had scoliosis. I didn't know and I didn't know he wore a really huge brace under his baggy sweater everyday. He was teasing me and I playfully smacked him in his stomach. It made a really loud noise and I was just like...oh.... I hurt my hand on his brace but I had to pretend like it didn't hurt so it wasn't double as awkward. He just laughed it off but we were both weird about it for a few days. 

    OP: Hopefully she never gives you that address. 
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  • natswildnatswild member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    My dad had flown back to my cousin's wedding, quite a few years ago, I think it was in June.  He then flew back 3 months later for a family reunion, and saw her there.  He said to her, "still married?" in a joking way, and she told him that she'd already divorced him.  Suuuper awkward!
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    larrygaga said:

    Since we are sharing awkward stories, one of my friends in college had scoliosis. I didn't know and I didn't know he wore a really huge brace under his baggy sweater everyday. He was teasing me and I playfully smacked him in his stomach. It made a really loud noise and I was just like...oh.... I hurt my hand on his brace but I had to pretend like it didn't hurt so it wasn't double as awkward. He just laughed it off but we were both weird about it for a few days. 


    OP: Hopefully she never gives you that address. 
    So far, no address. However this whole thing has spawned another layer of high school level drama as well... Please to be passing the wine..!
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  • blueeyedkatblueeyedkat member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Comment
    I learned to not deal with people like that anymore. I had a BFF who did that on social media all the time, then I found out she was talking smack, so you know what I did? I unfriended her on FB and all other social media. She's also not invited to the wedding, nor does she know any details of it. So just quietly unfriend that chick if you're not friends, and then get it out of your mind. You don't want that ex-couple drama at your wedding.

    As for the adults, my FI just had to tell his BFF that we're inviting his ex-gf to the wedding (BFF's ex), and he threw a bitch fit, saying he came first, that he wouldn't go if she did, blah blah. FI shut that shit down with "First of all, blueyedkat comes first! She likes ex, we get along with ex, and we both want her there. If you can't get along and be an adult, that's not our problem, and we will deal with it if you make it a problem. You're my BFF, and we want you at our wedding, but you need to be okay with this."  BAM!!! I was celebrating on the inside (I'm not really a fan of FI's BFF). So, that's how we deal with people, we make them realize they're adults, and that they're guests. Being a guest is a privilege, which can be taken away. Of course, this is all expressed politely.
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  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    purplepinkcupcake said:

    larrygaga said:

    Since we are sharing awkward stories, one of my friends in college had scoliosis. I didn't know and I didn't know he wore a really huge brace under his baggy sweater everyday. He was teasing me and I playfully smacked him in his stomach. It made a really loud noise and I was just like...oh.... I hurt my hand on his brace but I had to pretend like it didn't hurt so it wasn't double as awkward. He just laughed it off but we were both weird about it for a few days. 


    OP: Hopefully she never gives you that address. 
    So far, no address. However this whole thing has spawned another layer of high school level drama as well... Please to be passing the wine..!
    OP, how did you ask for her address? Did you say, hey Sue, I need you and Rob's address for our wedding invitations? Or did you say, I need your address? 
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Well, earlier this year my family found out that my cousin and her SO separated, some 2 years after the fact, when my cousin's ex remarried and he and his new wife posted a married status change on Facebook. My cousin and he kept their breakup a secret all that time. So the remarriage announcement came about a week after my dad posted something in which he referred to my cousin and her ex as his niece and nephew in law. It was really awkward. Facebook is not how most people want to hear about that kind of thing.

    As for the rest, I'm sorry all these people are being so immature. I hope you can get it all cleared up!
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    huskypuppy14 said:

    purplepinkcupcake said:

    larrygaga said:

    Since we are sharing awkward stories, one of my friends in college had scoliosis. I didn't know and I didn't know he wore a really huge brace under his baggy sweater everyday. He was teasing me and I playfully smacked him in his stomach. It made a really loud noise and I was just like...oh.... I hurt my hand on his brace but I had to pretend like it didn't hurt so it wasn't double as awkward. He just laughed it off but we were both weird about it for a few days. 


    OP: Hopefully she never gives you that address. 
    So far, no address. However this whole thing has spawned another layer of high school level drama as well... Please to be passing the wine..!
    OP, how did you ask for her address? Did you say, hey Sue, I need you and Rob's address for our wedding invitations? Or did you say, I need your address? 
    "Hey! Just wondering if I can get yours and Rob's address?" Assuming of course they had the same address.
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  • levieenroselevieenrose member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment Name Dropper
    edited May 2015
    Late to your thread, OP, but just wanted to share sympathy.

    I found out that two couples had broken up because of the wedding invitations. The dramatic one was my uncle who had split up (but not divorced) my aunt and his girlfriend moved in with him a little before I sent the invitations. They were so tight-lipped about it, we didn't even know until my mom called my uncle's phone number to ask for an RSVP from my aunt about the wedding shower (which had been sent to his address).  O.o  It was a little awkward for me when following up with everyone, but I'm really glad I wasn't on that initial phone call.

    Fortunately one of my other uncles received the invitation just before he decided to renounce most of his worldly possessions and became a drifter... :) We're an interesting lot.

    Then happy I, that love and am beloved 
    Where I may not remove nor be removed.

     --William Shakespeare (Sonnet 25)

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