Critique my timeline!

charcoalandblush · May 2015

I need an extra set of eyes (or several). This is the timeline that DF and I have come up with with our venue coordinator. How does this sound? Anything we're missing? Anything seem too short/too long?

10:00am Wedding party arrives, start getting
ready

2:00pm Guys – Pre-ceremony photos

3:00pm Girls - Pre-ceremony photos

3:00pm Vendors arrive & set up

5:00pm Ceremony Start

5:25pm Ceremony End

5:30pm Cocktail Hour/Wedding party &
family photos

6:25pm Ask guests to be seated for dinner/Cake cutting photos while
guests are being seated

6:30pm Grand March

6:35pm Buffet Opens

7:00pm All guests have food/are seated

7:15pm Best Man toast

7:20pm Maid of Honor toast

7:25pm Bride & Groom Thank You

7:30pm First Dance

7:35pm Father-Daughter Dance

7:40pm Mother-Son Dance

7:45pm General Dancing Starts

9:30pm Dark photos outside

11:00pm Last call

12:00am Music stops, last guests depart

1:00am Last vendors depart

lovegood90 · May 2015

Are you doing table visits, or a receiving line instead? Just wondering because it doesn't look like there's much room for table visits if you're going that route. I like it though!

Casadena · May 2015

I would add a receiving line between the ceremony and cocktail hour.

And get rid of the "grand march". Especially if you're already going to be in the venue and taking pictures. I (personally) just don't get the mingling/hiding/being introduced thing. They're at your wedding, they know who you are.

Overall, your timeline looks good though!

KatWAG · May 2015

I think it looks pretty good to me, as long as you have time for table visits.

What is a grand march?

charcoalandblush · May 2015

KatWAG said:
I think it looks pretty good to me, as long as you have time for table visits.

What is a grand march?

I had never heard of a grand march before I moved here (midwest) but they're extremely common here. It's basically where the wedding party is introduced to the guests (and the bride and groom are introduced at the end). Every single wedding I've been to here has had one. It will probably take less than 2 minutes, so I don't think cutting it will really help our timeline at all as far as table visits go. And I think DF's family and friends would probably think it's really weird to not have one.

We were hoping to do table visits from 6:45-7:15, but that may be a bit ambitious. I was hoping that the two of us would have time to eat while guests are being seated/going through the buffet line. Maybe I'll build some more time in for that just in case.

MandyMost · May 2015

What are the guys doing from 2;30-5pm. Photos should not take more than a half an hour. And the girls, from 3:30-5pm? That's a lot of awkward time to be sitting still and not getting messy, which will be very exhausting.

[Deleted User] · May 2015

MandyMost said:
What are the guys doing from 2;30-5pm. Photos should not take more than a half an hour. And the girls, from 3:30-5pm? That's a lot of awkward time to be sitting still and not getting messy, which will be very exhausting.

I was wondering this as well. Because basically you're asking the guys to be dressed and ready to go three hours before they actually need to be doing anything. Even as a girl, while I might have my hair all up and done, I don't want to sliding into spanks and an uncomfortable bra two hours early.

lovegood90 · May 2015

charcoalandblush said:

KatWAG said:
I think it looks pretty good to me, as long as you have time for table visits.

What is a grand march?

I had never heard of a grand march before I moved here (midwest) but they're extremely common here. It's basically where the wedding party is introduced to the guests (and the bride and groom are introduced at the end). Every single wedding I've been to here has had one. It will probably take less than 2 minutes, so I don't think cutting it will really help our timeline at all as far as table visits go. And I think DF's family and friends would probably think it's really weird to not have one.

We were hoping to do table visits from 6:45-7:15, but that may be a bit ambitious. I was hoping that the two of us would have time to eat while guests are being seated/going through the buffet line. Maybe I'll build some more time in for that just in case.

How many guests are you having? A half hour may not be enough time.

charcoalandblush · May 2015

lovegood90 said:

charcoalandblush said:

KatWAG said:
I think it looks pretty good to me, as long as you have time for table visits.

What is a grand march?

I had never heard of a grand march before I moved here (midwest) but they're extremely common here. It's basically where the wedding party is introduced to the guests (and the bride and groom are introduced at the end). Every single wedding I've been to here has had one. It will probably take less than 2 minutes, so I don't think cutting it will really help our timeline at all as far as table visits go. And I think DF's family and friends would probably think it's really weird to not have one.

We were hoping to do table visits from 6:45-7:15, but that may be a bit ambitious. I was hoping that the two of us would have time to eat while guests are being seated/going through the buffet line. Maybe I'll build some more time in for that just in case.
How many guests are you having? A half hour may not be enough time.

Not positive at this point, but probably somewhere around 160. I'm definitely not sure on the time for that... I've never been to a wedding that had table visits. And the only one I've been to that had a receiving line had like 350+ guests and the receiving line included both sets of parents and all of their siblings, so it legitimately took like 2 hours.

KatWAG · May 2015

charcoalandblush said:

KatWAG said:
I think it looks pretty good to me, as long as you have time for table visits.

What is a grand march?

I had never heard of a grand march before I moved here (midwest) but they're extremely common here. It's basically where the wedding party is introduced to the guests (and the bride and groom are introduced at the end). Every single wedding I've been to here has had one. It will probably take less than 2 minutes, so I don't think cutting it will really help our timeline at all as far as table visits go. And I think DF's family and friends would probably think it's really weird to not have one.

We were hoping to do table visits from 6:45-7:15, but that may be a bit ambitious. I was hoping that the two of us would have time to eat while guests are being seated/going through the buffet line. Maybe I'll build some more time in for that just in case.

I am in the midwest and did this. But I didn't know it had a name!

charcoalandblush · May 2015

KatWAG said:

charcoalandblush said:

KatWAG said:
I think it looks pretty good to me, as long as you have time for table visits.

What is a grand march?

I had never heard of a grand march before I moved here (midwest) but they're extremely common here. It's basically where the wedding party is introduced to the guests (and the bride and groom are introduced at the end). Every single wedding I've been to here has had one. It will probably take less than 2 minutes, so I don't think cutting it will really help our timeline at all as far as table visits go. And I think DF's family and friends would probably think it's really weird to not have one.

We were hoping to do table visits from 6:45-7:15, but that may be a bit ambitious. I was hoping that the two of us would have time to eat while guests are being seated/going through the buffet line. Maybe I'll build some more time in for that just in case.
I am in the midwest and did this. But I didn't know it had a name!

I've also heard them just called "grand entrance," but same concept. I had never seen one before I moved out here! None of my east coast weddings had them. But I see them all the time here.

Knottie92548810 · May 2015

I've worked many weddings and if last call is more than 15 to 30 minutes before the music stops, people get pretty upset that they can't get another drink. That's the only thing I can see.

charcoalandblush · May 2015

Knottie92548810 said:
I've worked many weddings and if last call is more than 15 to 30 minutes before the music stops, people get pretty upset that they can't get another drink. That's the only thing I can see.

Unfortunately this is set by our venue, not by us

I'm guessing we'll probably functionally consider the reception over at 11pm. Definitely a risk I was aware of when going with a venue that mandates last call.

JoanE2012 · May 2015

I think 30 minutes of toasts, speeches and dances is much too long. We did the entrance, went right into dances (not the whole songs!), had a best man toast and then went into dinner service. I would think it would get a bit noisy with everyone eating during speeches and toasts too. And it might get awkward....what if I want to go back up to the buffet again.....I'd feel I had to wait until speeches and dances were done.

MGP · May 2015

Having people arrive at 10:00 to get ready for a wedding that starts at 5:00? And then you want them to stay until midnight? That's a 14 hour day. Being in the wedding party is like a job. Have you ever worked a 14 hour day? I sure have and the last thing I would want to do is have to stay dressed up and camera ready that whole time. Let them get ready wherever they want and arrive no earlier than 3:30 for pictures. An hour before plus an hour after the ceremony is more than enough time for pictures.

Also cut some of the toasts and dances.

banana468 · May 2015

The pre-ceremony time seems long and like your WP is going to be all dressed up with nothing to do for a long time.

I'd also switch the toasts around. Generally the best flow is to get everything done right away so I'd do them immediately after the entrance.

southernbelle0915 · May 2015

My only feedback is that you're doing toasts and first dances right when people start eating. Most people feel rude eating while a toast is being made. Their food will just get cold. I would move your toasts to about 7:45 and the dances to 8:00.

When are you planning to cut the cake? If I were you, I'd do it right after toasts. Then the staff can cut it up and serve it while people are watching your first dances.

Also, you need to think about table visits since you're not doing a receiving line. If you push back the toasts, you'll have time to do this. You may want to shovel some food in your face before the march so you have time to visit.

ETA: 30 minute is definitely NOT enough time for 160 guests. With my suggested revisions, I think you'll have enough time and it'll be more relaxed.

charcoalandblush · May 2015

southernbelle0915 said:
My only feedback is that you're doing toasts and first dances right when people start eating. Most people feel rude eating while a toast is being made. Their food will just get cold. I would move your toasts to about 7:45 and the dances to 8:00.

When are you planning to cut the cake? If I were you, I'd do it right after toasts. Then the staff can cut it up and serve it while people are watching your first dances.

Also, you need to think about table visits since you're not doing a receiving line. If you push back the toasts, you'll have time to do this. You may want to shovel some food in your face before the march so you have time to visit.

ETA: 30 minute is definitely NOT enough time for 160 guests. With my suggested revisions, I think you'll have enough time and it'll be more relaxed.

We're planning to cut the cake at 6:25/6:30 while guests are finding their seats for dinner/before we line up for the grand march. The venue suggested that we do our cake cutting photos before the buffet opens so that the venue staff can cut and plate the cake while everyone is eating and serve it immediately after dinner.

I guess I was kind of hoping to kill two birds with one stone having toasts and dinner at the same time. I didn't realize that people wouldn't eat during toasts. I'm hoping all of the toasts will take <10 min total, but I budgeted a little bit more of a buffer than that.

banana468 · May 2015

FWIW, we did toasts right before the meal. It was right after our first dance and our guests were seated.

Jen4948 · May 2015

I think that the "getting ready" time blocks are too long. If the ceremony isn't until 5pm and photos won't be until 2pm, I don't see why you need everyone there at 10am. That's a very long time to "get ready."

Can you overlap some of the pre-ceremony photo sessions? I would hate to have to sit around dressed up with nothing to do while waiting for photos to be taken if I'm in a wedding party.

I'd also shrink the toast/first dance time from 30 minutes to at least half of that. That's a long time during the reception for the guests to be expected to give you their undivided attention.

charcoalandblush · May 2015

Jen4948 said:
I think that the "getting ready" time blocks are too long. If the ceremony isn't until 5pm and photos won't be until 2pm, I don't see why you need everyone there at 10am. That's a very long time to "get ready."
Can you overlap some of the pre-ceremony photo sessions? I would hate to have to sit around dressed up with nothing to do while waiting for photos to be taken if I'm in a wedding party.
I'd also shrink the toast/first dance time from 30 minutes to at least half of that. That's a long time during the reception for the guests to be expected to give you their undivided attention.

The guys getting ready time will definitely be pushed back. The girls is so long because all but one of my bridesmaids, plus both of our moms, have decided to get their hair professionally done, and about half have decided to do professional makeup. I've hired two people to do it, but they still think it will likely take 4-5 hours to get everyone in.

Jen4948 · May 2015

charcoalandblush said:

Jen4948 said:
I think that the "getting ready" time blocks are too long. If the ceremony isn't until 5pm and photos won't be until 2pm, I don't see why you need everyone there at 10am. That's a very long time to "get ready."
Can you overlap some of the pre-ceremony photo sessions? I would hate to have to sit around dressed up with nothing to do while waiting for photos to be taken if I'm in a wedding party.
I'd also shrink the toast/first dance time from 30 minutes to at least half of that. That's a long time during the reception for the guests to be expected to give you their undivided attention.

The guys getting ready time will definitely be pushed back. The girls is so long because all but one of my bridesmaids, plus both of our moms, have decided to get their hair professionally done, and about half have decided to do professional makeup. I've hired two people to do it, but they still think it will likely take 4-5 hours to get everyone in.

Are you serving breakfast or lunch to your wedding party members, given how long you want them there and how long it will be before your reception starts (presumably they'll be taking photos with you during cocktail hour so they won't have time to eat then)?

charcoalandblush · May 2015

Jen4948 said:

charcoalandblush said:

Jen4948 said:
I think that the "getting ready" time blocks are too long. If the ceremony isn't until 5pm and photos won't be until 2pm, I don't see why you need everyone there at 10am. That's a very long time to "get ready."
Can you overlap some of the pre-ceremony photo sessions? I would hate to have to sit around dressed up with nothing to do while waiting for photos to be taken if I'm in a wedding party.
I'd also shrink the toast/first dance time from 30 minutes to at least half of that. That's a long time during the reception for the guests to be expected to give you their undivided attention.

The guys getting ready time will definitely be pushed back. The girls is so long because all but one of my bridesmaids, plus both of our moms, have decided to get their hair professionally done, and about half have decided to do professional makeup. I've hired two people to do it, but they still think it will likely take 4-5 hours to get everyone in.
Are you serving breakfast or lunch to your wedding party members, given how long you want them there and how long it will be before your reception starts (presumably they'll be taking photos with you during cocktail hour so they won't have time to eat then)?

I'll be serving breakfast and lunch. We're getting ready in a big suite at the hotel attached to the venue. We'll have fruit and pastries as soon as everyone arrives, and then around noon-1pm we'll order room service lunch. All on me.

southernbelle0915 · May 2015

Jen4948 said:

charcoalandblush said:

Jen4948 said:
I think that the "getting ready" time blocks are too long. If the ceremony isn't until 5pm and photos won't be until 2pm, I don't see why you need everyone there at 10am. That's a very long time to "get ready."
Can you overlap some of the pre-ceremony photo sessions? I would hate to have to sit around dressed up with nothing to do while waiting for photos to be taken if I'm in a wedding party.
I'd also shrink the toast/first dance time from 30 minutes to at least half of that. That's a long time during the reception for the guests to be expected to give you their undivided attention.

The guys getting ready time will definitely be pushed back. The girls is so long because all but one of my bridesmaids, plus both of our moms, have decided to get their hair professionally done, and about half have decided to do professional makeup. I've hired two people to do it, but they still think it will likely take 4-5 hours to get everyone in.
Are you serving breakfast or lunch to your wedding party members, given how long you want them there and how long it will be before your reception starts (presumably they'll be taking photos with you during cocktail hour so they won't have time to eat then)?

This. I think if you require them to be there over a meal time, you need to feed them.

DH was in a wedding where he had to be there at like 11am and the wedding started at 5 or 6. They didn't feed the guys (guys assumed they'd have lunch because meal time) and they were almost ravenous when they finally got to the reception after photos. Not pretty.

charcoalandblush · May 2015

southernbelle0915 said:

Jen4948 said:

charcoalandblush said:

Jen4948 said:
I think that the "getting ready" time blocks are too long. If the ceremony isn't until 5pm and photos won't be until 2pm, I don't see why you need everyone there at 10am. That's a very long time to "get ready."
Can you overlap some of the pre-ceremony photo sessions? I would hate to have to sit around dressed up with nothing to do while waiting for photos to be taken if I'm in a wedding party.
I'd also shrink the toast/first dance time from 30 minutes to at least half of that. That's a long time during the reception for the guests to be expected to give you their undivided attention.

The guys getting ready time will definitely be pushed back. The girls is so long because all but one of my bridesmaids, plus both of our moms, have decided to get their hair professionally done, and about half have decided to do professional makeup. I've hired two people to do it, but they still think it will likely take 4-5 hours to get everyone in.
Are you serving breakfast or lunch to your wedding party members, given how long you want them there and how long it will be before your reception starts (presumably they'll be taking photos with you during cocktail hour so they won't have time to eat then)?
This. I think if you require them to be there over a meal time, you need to feed them.

DH was in a wedding where he had to be there at like 11am and the wedding started at 5 or 6. They didn't feed the guys (guys assumed they'd have lunch because meal time) and they were almost ravenous when they finally got to the reception after photos. Not pretty.

The plan is that we'll have a light breakfast ready when everyone gets there and then everyone will order what they want for lunch from room service and have it charged to my room.

tcnoble · May 2015

Definitely need more than a half hour for table visits. We had I think 135 guests and 16? tables... it takes WAY longer than you think because everyone wants to visit. It helps to have a DOC who can kind of move you along.

The room service lunch plan might sound great but in reality, could take a lot longer to get all the orders. Maybe look in to sandwich trays or something from Jason's Deli, Panera, etc.

As for the getting ready time... FWIW we had girls arrive at 12pm for HMU, and everyone was in dresses by 4pm. Our photog did pics with the girls for 30 minutes, then the guys for another 30. Definitely don't need THAT long to catch those moments.

Ditto PP who mentioned cutting the dance songs shorter... our first dance song was 2 minutes 30 seconds long and even that felt LONG. It's a great moment but really nobody wants to watch you dance for 5 minutes.

I think it is kind of strange to do the cake cutting BEFORE your grand entrance... we did our grand entrance, right to first dance, then cut the cake before the buffet opened. Just seemed to flow better that way.

kmmssg · May 2015

Your timeline prior to the start of the wedding is really undefined and lacking detail.

When I was in the Army they taught me backwards planning. Example: my mission is to take my platoon and overtake a hill that is 57 kilometers away. I am supposed to hit that target exactly at 0800 hrs. My planning STARTS at the time I am to hit the target (which is also known as when you walk down the aisle) and works backwards.

0800 - hit target
0740 - move platoon into positions
0725 - secure vehicles and move towards position
0500 - 0725 - travel time
0450 - board vehicles
0400-0445 - one last maintenance check on vehicles
this goes on at least 24 hours prior to the mission

You include meal times, travel times between all points, bathroom times, sleep times, etc.

For my 4 daughters weddings it would look something like this:
5pm - wedding starts
4:30 pm - bride and BM's are out of sight in bridal room
4:20 pm - bridal party arrives
4:00 - 4:20 - travel time to wedding venue
4:15 - bridal party boards transportation to venue
2:00 - 4:10 - all pictures prior to ceremony, including first look
1:50 - 2:00 - 10 minute buffer to timeline
1:30 - 1:45 - bridal party travels to picture location
1:25 - Bridal party boards transportation to picture location

This continues on until what time to get out of bed and the day before is also planned this way.

What you have now really leaves a lot of wasted time and also a lot of undefined time. If you want to be on time you have to account for everything and not be so vague.

PrettyGirlLost · May 2015

charcoalandblush said:
I need an extra set of eyes (or several). This is the timeline that DF and I have come up with with our venue coordinator. How does this sound? Anything we're missing? Anything seem too short/too long?

10:00am Wedding party arrives, start getting
ready

2:00pm           Guys – Pre-ceremony photos

3:00pm           Girls - Pre-ceremony photos
Do you only have a single shooter? 3hours for pre-ceremony pics is way too long.

3:00pm           Vendors arrive & set up

5:00pm           Ceremony Start

5:25pm           Ceremony End

5:30pm           Cocktail Hour/Wedding party &
family photos

6:25pm Ask guests to be seated for dinner/Cake cutting photos while
guests are being seated

6:30pm           Grand March
It'd cut this. It's the same as a grand entrance where the DJ introduces every person in the wedding party, and it's unnecessary. Most guests don't care how your WP members are but will likely know them if they are family members, and everyone knows who you and your FI are.

6:35pm           Buffet Opens

7:00pm           All guests have food/are seated

7:15pm           Best Man toast

7:20pm           Maid of Honor toast

7:25pm           Bride & Groom Thank You

7:30pm           First Dance

7:35pm           Father-Daughter Dance

7:40pm           Mother-Son Dance
10mins of spotlight dances is too much. The songs should be a max of 2mins each, so this should really only take about 6mins total.

7:45pm           General Dancing Starts

9:30pm           Dark photos outside

11:00pm         Last call

12:00am          Music stops, last guests depart

1:00am            Last vendors depart

When are you going to do table visits? You are only giving yourself 40mins to eat and then do table visits before all the toasts start. I don't think that's enough time. I think you need at least 15min-20mins to allow yourselves to eat, then another 35mins-1hr for table visits depending on how many guests you have.

ETA: I had 160 guests. . . your timeline def doesn't give you enough time to eat and do table visits. We did a receiving line right at the end of cocktail hour, as the food stations were being set up. By the time the receiving line was completed, the food was ready and everyone started to eat!

Cutting the cake once you enter is just fine, and it makes sense with regards to plating time. That's what we did, it worked out fine.

I also think, as a guest, it's preferable to have toasts during dinner- they are short toasts, not 5min speeches each. And even if they do run too long, people will eat during speeches. at least in my circle, we all can manage to pay attention and eat quietly at the same time, lol.

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