Wedding Invitations & Paper

RSVP wording question

aliwis000aliwis000 member
5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper First Comment
So we are ordering our invitations and I believe I am good on those. However, I had a question about wording on the RSVP cards. Currently I have the following:

The courtesy of a reply is requested
on or before August, 28, 2015
M________________
____ will  ____ will not attend
Number of persons________

There are some families that have kids that are invited but many have said they will probably leave them at home.  I wanted the "number of persons" part so they can indicate the adults are coming and not the kids if that ends up being the case. I also have blended families who may not be able to bring all the kids because of alternating weekends etc.

Does this look right? Is it too confusing? Does the number of persons part encourage people to think they can invite all the extra people they want?

Am I over thinking this one? :)

Re: RSVP wording question

  • CasadenaCasadena member
    First Comment First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited June 2015

    I think it's confusing.  Just have something like:

    Name(s)______________ or M__________________ 

    # attending________

    # of Chicken___ fish ____ etc____  (if you need food choices.  IF not, just omit this line. )

    Kindly respond by June, 1 2015 

    ETA:  response date

  • edited June 2015
    I think you have the right idea. Maybe something a little more concise like this:

    The favor of a reply is requested by August 28, 2015
    M_____________
    _____ Accepts with pleasure
    _____ Number Attending

    _____ Declines with regrets


    They will (should!) know that they are only responding for the names listed on the invitation envelope- so if the children are invited then be sure the envelope is inclusive of them.
  • Please don't use "accepts with pleasure" or "declines with regrets."

    I may accept an invitation with regret or decline with pleasure.  So may others.  Don't decide for your guests how they feel (or should feel) about responding to your invitation.  Just use "Accepts" and "Declines."

  • edited June 2015
    I've never seen an invite that didn't say something along those lines. How pessimistic to say you're accepting an invitation with regret. My gosh!! Don't attend!
  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited June 2015
    I've never seen an invite that didn't say something along those lines. How pessimistic to say you're accepting an invitation with regret. My gosh!! Don't attend!


    If you lurk, you'll find other threads in which other posters tell you the exact same thing.  Nobody likes having words put in their mouths (or their minds) about how they feel about the invitation.  And telling people "How pessimistic! My gosh!" is doing more of the same, BTW.  It's not up to you how other people should feel about or respond to an invitation.

  • edited June 2015
    I don't need to lurk. I work in the entertainment industry in NYC and have been exposed to more rsvp cards than anyone cares to see. This is the first I'm hearing of people being so sensitive to the wording on an rsvp card. A little ridiculous. Everyone gets so uptight about the silliest things. YOU feel how you want to feel, the wording is not making YOU feel a certain way. Yikes!!
  • I don't need to lurk. I work in the entertainment business in NYC and have been exposed to more rsvp cards than anyone cares to see. This is the first I'm hearing of people being so sensitive to the wording on an rsvp card. A little ridiculous. Everyone gets so uptight about the silliest things. YOU feel how you want to feel, the wording is not making YOU feel a certain way. Yikes!!
    Yikes yourself.  You are not the only person entitled to an opinion on this board, and you're not even in the majority.  Whether you're in the entertainment business or in NYC is not relevant. Get over yourself.
  • Very relevant but thank you for the childish response!
  • Jen4948 said:
    I don't need to lurk. I work in the entertainment business in NYC and have been exposed to more rsvp cards than anyone cares to see. This is the first I'm hearing of people being so sensitive to the wording on an rsvp card. A little ridiculous. Everyone gets so uptight about the silliest things. YOU feel how you want to feel, the wording is not making YOU feel a certain way. Yikes!!
    Yikes yourself.  You are not the only person entitled to an opinion on this board, and you're not even in the majority.  Whether you're in the entertainment business or in NYC is not relevant. Get over yourself.
    I don't often agree with Jen, but I do here.  Don't tell me how to feel.
  • adk19 said:
    Jen4948 said:
    I don't need to lurk. I work in the entertainment business in NYC and have been exposed to more rsvp cards than anyone cares to see. This is the first I'm hearing of people being so sensitive to the wording on an rsvp card. A little ridiculous. Everyone gets so uptight about the silliest things. YOU feel how you want to feel, the wording is not making YOU feel a certain way. Yikes!!
    Yikes yourself.  You are not the only person entitled to an opinion on this board, and you're not even in the majority.  Whether you're in the entertainment business or in NYC is not relevant. Get over yourself.
    I don't often agree with Jen, but I do here.  Don't tell me how to feel.
    Actually, I do agree with you a lot! :-)
  • adk19 said:
    Jen4948 said:
    I don't need to lurk. I work in the entertainment business in NYC and have been exposed to more rsvp cards than anyone cares to see. This is the first I'm hearing of people being so sensitive to the wording on an rsvp card. A little ridiculous. Everyone gets so uptight about the silliest things. YOU feel how you want to feel, the wording is not making YOU feel a certain way. Yikes!!
    Yikes yourself.  You are not the only person entitled to an opinion on this board, and you're not even in the majority.  Whether you're in the entertainment business or in NYC is not relevant. Get over yourself.
    I don't often agree with Jen, but I do here.  Don't tell me how to feel.
    Same. I hate when people tell me how to feel. I'm a counselor, I can be in tune with my feelings when I choose to. 
    image
  • Jen4948 said:
    adk19 said:
    Jen4948 said:
    I don't need to lurk. I work in the entertainment business in NYC and have been exposed to more rsvp cards than anyone cares to see. This is the first I'm hearing of people being so sensitive to the wording on an rsvp card. A little ridiculous. Everyone gets so uptight about the silliest things. YOU feel how you want to feel, the wording is not making YOU feel a certain way. Yikes!!
    Yikes yourself.  You are not the only person entitled to an opinion on this board, and you're not even in the majority.  Whether you're in the entertainment business or in NYC is not relevant. Get over yourself.
    I don't often agree with Jen, but I do here.  Don't tell me how to feel.
    Actually, I do agree with you a lot! :-)
    Jen, Maybe I just notice it's you when I'm disagreeing.  Because I found another place where I agree with you and it's kinda freaking me out.  ;-)
  • adk19 said:
    Jen4948 said:
    adk19 said:
    Jen4948 said:
    I don't need to lurk. I work in the entertainment business in NYC and have been exposed to more rsvp cards than anyone cares to see. This is the first I'm hearing of people being so sensitive to the wording on an rsvp card. A little ridiculous. Everyone gets so uptight about the silliest things. YOU feel how you want to feel, the wording is not making YOU feel a certain way. Yikes!!
    Yikes yourself.  You are not the only person entitled to an opinion on this board, and you're not even in the majority.  Whether you're in the entertainment business or in NYC is not relevant. Get over yourself.
    I don't often agree with Jen, but I do here.  Don't tell me how to feel.
    Actually, I do agree with you a lot! :-)
    Jen, Maybe I just notice it's you when I'm disagreeing.  Because I found another place where I agree with you and it's kinda freaking me out.  ;-)
    Wow.
  • adk19 said:
    Jen4948 said:
    I don't need to lurk. I work in the entertainment business in NYC and have been exposed to more rsvp cards than anyone cares to see. This is the first I'm hearing of people being so sensitive to the wording on an rsvp card. A little ridiculous. Everyone gets so uptight about the silliest things. YOU feel how you want to feel, the wording is not making YOU feel a certain way. Yikes!!
    Yikes yourself.  You are not the only person entitled to an opinion on this board, and you're not even in the majority.  Whether you're in the entertainment business or in NYC is not relevant. Get over yourself.
    I don't often agree with Jen, but I do here.  Don't tell me how to feel.
    I was going to say the same thing. I don't always agree with Jen, but she's 100% right here. It's presumptuous to tell guests how they should feel about accepting or declining.

    It's pretty ridiculous to use "I work in tv" as a reason that your advice is correct. Who seriously thinks that tv is a beacon of etiquette or even good behavior? 
  • I'm not sure I'd say it's pessimistic to argue over cutifying the wording on an RSVP card. I'd probably say pedantic. And also maybe trollish, since the thread derailed where that began. But hey, what's a little pedantic trolling between friends?

    OP, I think you could be a little more concise:

    Number Attending: ____
    Number Declining: ____

    That way you don't need a third line and it makes it a little more clear that it's not an invite-your-soccer-team sort of thing.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited June 2015
    I don't need to lurk. I work in the entertainment industry in NYC and have been exposed to more rsvp cards than anyone cares to see. This is the first I'm hearing of people being so sensitive to the wording on an rsvp card. A little ridiculous. Everyone gets so uptight about the silliest things. YOU feel how you want to feel, the wording is not making YOU feel a certain way. Yikes!!
    How does working in the entertainment industry make you an expert on etiquette?  Kim Kardashian works in the entertainment industry, too.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited June 2015
    Sometimes, it IS the wording that makes one feel that way. If they see the wording and are put off by it, it very much IS the wording leading their feelings. 

    And you working in the entertainment industry and having seen lots of RSVP cards does not make you privy to what was in the minds of the people filling out those RSVP cards. As you can see here, there certainly ARE people who don't care for that wording.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • Thank you to everyone for their help. I have adjusted the wording to be more to the point. I never want to make someone feel unwelcome or confused. If any of my guests feel that way I would be hurt for it was never my intent. Thank you again!
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