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Religious Ceremony Question! Help!

I was raised Roman Catholic but am not in good standing as I do not attend church anymore. My fiance grew up in a Native American community but was baptized. I was really hoping to get married in a church (episcopal, presbyterian, etc). Are we able to get married in a christian church if we are not that religion? 

Re: Religious Ceremony Question! Help!

  • ohmrs2014ohmrs2014 Dirty Jerz mod
    Moderator 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    That is something you would need to speak with the pastor of whichever Church you are looking at about.  

    But question, why get married in a Church at all?  It appears as though, based on what your saying, that neither of you are really religious.
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  • It's funny because when we first thought about where we were getting married we only looked at venues with a ceremony option. The venue we chose can absolutely do the ceremony and it would be lovely but part of me, having grown up Catholic, feels that we need to have it in a church. It needs to be more significant.
  • ohmrs2014ohmrs2014 Dirty Jerz mod
    Moderator 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    I was in your same shoes.  I was being pressured by my parents to have it in our Church, but I finally put my foot down and did it my way.

    Apart of me wanted the Catholic ceremony, but DH is also not Catholic.  He's a believer, but was never baptized and I felt like my pastor was holding that against us.  He wanted us to "donate" the non-parishioner fee, even though I was a parishioner.  Never looked back after that conversation.
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  • JoanE2012JoanE2012 Exit 21 (Jersey!) member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    km674394 said:
    It's funny because when we first thought about where we were getting married we only looked at venues with a ceremony option. The venue we chose can absolutely do the ceremony and it would be lovely but part of me, having grown up Catholic, feels that we need to have it in a church. It needs to be more significant.
    It sounds like it's not a significant part of your day-to-day life....why the change just to get married?

    DH and I were raised Catholic.  We don't go to church or are members so we thought it was silly just to do so to get married. Instead ,our ceremony was held at the same place as the reception....it was nice and convenient for everyone!
  • Probably worth mentioning that you cannot get married in the Catholic Church unless one of you have received all of the prior sacraments (baptism, communion & confirmation). Not sure what other christian religion requirements are, though. I'm Catholic, FI is not and my priest doesn't mind in the slightest. It's all based on the individual church.

    I agree with PP's that you should have the ceremony that you feel really encompasses you and FI as a couple and what celebrates YOU. If religion/church hasn't had a part in it, then I wouldn't focus on it being a part of your ceremony, especially a religion that neither of you were raised in or practice on any level.
  • edited August 2015
    My sister got married in a Lutheran church the second time because she was divorced and the Catholic Church would not marry her.  Neither he or her husband were Lutheran.  
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