Wedding Etiquette Forum

Children's menu

Our venue/caterer offers a children's menu with no age restrictions written. Just wondering at what age is it considered rude to offer the children's menu options? I'm thinking a 5 year old might appreciate the chicken nuggets, but a 10 year old might not. Thoughts?

Re: Children's menu

  • Some 5 year old eat adult meals and some 12 year olds eat kids meals.

    How many kids to you have coming?  If it's only a few I would reach out to the parents.   Or you can just put a kids option on your RSVP card (if you are having one)






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • I would not have appreciated chicken nuggets at 5 or 12, but my 30+ year-old picky ass sister would probably STILL prefer that to the adult meal, so you just never know. I would check with the parents. Are you having a plated meal with pre-determined entree choices for the adults, or is it a buffet? If the adults are sending in their entree choices with the RSVP you could just add a 3rd line for "Children's Meal" if you didn't want to call everyone bringing children. Keep in mind however that you should not do this if there are some people invited to bring their children but others just invited as a couple.
  • There are two ways you can go about it:  1) If you are going to announce your menus to your guests to allow them to select different meals, you can include the kid's meal as an option that they can select when they RSVP.  Or, 2) you can contact the parents of the kids in question and find out which option they'd prefer for their kids (presumably the kids would also prefer it).


  • I like the idea of just putting the option on all the RSVP cards so anyone who wants it can use it, but parents don't feel obligated to use it for their kids. Thanks!

    And to answer the question above, I'm inviting the kids of all the guests. I love kids and as a child, I was invited to many of the weddings my parents attended and have no problem with kids being at my wedding. My Fi didn't care one way or the other if kids are there.
  • I love kids too.  Was invited to a lot of weddings as a kid.  That was mostly because I was the 19th of 24 grandkids born.  It was pretty much expected that first cousins were invited to your wedding. Minor or not.  My first first cousin got married when I was about 6.    However, I was never invited to extended family (cousin of cousins wedding) or weddings of my parent's friends.  Way too many of us.

    I didn't invited my cousin's kids to my wedding because they ranged in age from 30-something until 5 years old (55+ of them).  Actually some of my cousin's kids had kids already.  No way was I going to invite my cousin's kids who were minors and not one who was adult, even though I actually had a, although limited, relationship.  


    Point being this subject is not cut a dry.   I'm one of 24 grandkids.  When you add SO's that is 48 people.   48 (which I invited all of them to my wedding).   If you add kids it's fucking a lot of people.    

    Just because I didn't add  everyone's kids doesn't mean I don't like kids.  It just means my already 150+ wedding would have been well over 240 people.     

    Sorrynotsorry






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • I wasn't implying that anyone who didn't invite kids doesn't like them. My point was simply that I love children and have no problem with them being at my wedding. I'm planning a somewhat upscale event, but I don't see an issue. Anyway, my family is small, consisting of myself, my parents, my sister, my aunt, uncle, and three cousins. No extended family (grandparents passed away and my parents' siblings are not in the picture). No one in my family has kids -- cousins are late teens and sister doesn't have kids). My guest list includes 100 people, only 8 of whom are children.
  • Is your adult meal plated or buffet? We had a buffet and kids were allowed to go up in addition to the plated chichicken nuggets they received. We automatically ordered nuggets for everyone 12 and under and checked with all the high school aged kids.
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

  • Ours is plated.
  • I would just add a kid's meal option to your RSVP






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Ask the parents. My venue offers chicken fingers and french fries for guests 10 years old and younger. Those who are 11-20 years old get an adult entree but for a cheaper price because it is minus the cost of alcohol. The only kids we are having at our wedding are my nieces and nephew, so I asked my sisters if the chicken fingers would be alright for their kids.
                                     Wedding Countdown Ticker

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  • I agree with PPs - ask the parents because they know best what their kids will and will not eat.

    I know some 3-year-olds who would prefer an adult meal over the chicken fingers kids' meal option, and some middle school and high school aged kids who would definitely prefer the kids' meal option.

  • Ours has a kids menu but also offers discount on regular menu for kids (cheaper than kids menu actually) maybe check into that.
  • Our venue/caterer offers a children's menu with no age restrictions written. Just wondering at what age is it considered rude to offer the children's menu options? I'm thinking a 5 year old might appreciate the chicken nuggets, but a 10 year old might not. Thoughts?
    I'm a little surprised there's no stated age restriction. I would double check that first before adding anything to your RSVP because it would be a giant pain to put it on there and have a bunch of people want it, and then find out it's not for anyone over 12.
  • AprilH81AprilH81 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited August 2015
    We had a plated lunch and a good chunk of our guests (we invited 80) were families with children.  We did one RSVP card with the menu options and printed an insert stating that a children's plate was available and that kids had the option of the kid's meal or an adult meal, they just needed to let us know. The insert only went into the invite for those with children.

    Some of the older kids (over 8 from what I remember) chose the adult meal but I also had two adults ask for the chicken tenders.  I double checked with the caterer to make sure it was okay to give the adults the kid's meal but otherwise left it alone.
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  • Our venue offered a kids meal, but provided a cut off (age 12)- I agree I would double check.

    Our meals were plated, and all guests had the option of chicken or beef, so on our RSVP cards we listed all three options:

    __ chicken
    __ beef
    __ kids meal (12 and under)

    and let the guests decide.
  • We only invited our FG, RB, and the daughters of a guest who was traveling cross-country to our wedding. We didn't put the kid's menu choice on the RSVP card to alleviate any confusion and just verbally asked the parents if their kids would want the kids menu item, but that only totaled asking 3 sets of parents. In your case, I think it makes the most sense to put it on the RSVP card as an item for the parents to check off.
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