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January 2016 Weddings

Maid of Honor Dropped Out... What do I do?

My MOH dropped out of the wedding. She found out in June that she is pregnant and will be 8 months by the time the wedding came around. Her husband took a job across the country and they moved. Because she is pregnant and will be so far along by the time the wedding comes, she dropped out. Things also didn't end so well between us as she wasn't being honest with me about her situation. I understand that she has her own life to live.

Now, I am without a MOH. I have three bridesmaids - 1 being a good friend from college, 1 being my fiancé's sister in law (future sister is law) and 1 being my fiancé's cousin. I have no sisters or cousins. My friend lives in another city 4 hours away and hasn't helped me much or stepped up since my MOH dropped. My future SIL has stepped up and has helped my mom and future MIL a lot with my bridal shower and she has planned my bachelorette party. I am not super close to her though. My fiancé's cousin is working full time and also lives in another city 4 hours away and I should note I am also not super close to her either. I was thinking of asking my friend to be a MOH but I didn't want to offend her as I originally did not ask her. She also hasn't stepped up much since my MOH dropped out. I was thinking of asking my future SIL since she has done soo much but I am not all that close to her.

My grandmom found out about my situation and wants to be a bridesmaid and I was thinking of making her my Matron of Honor but I am not sure about that. My grandmom can get a little fiesty and unpredictable.

So ladies... I need your advice. What would you do in my situation?

Re: Maid of Honor Dropped Out... What do I do?

  • I would be sad that my friend couldn't be in my wedding and then just have BMs. Nobody needs to "step up", it's not a job and not their responsibility. I think you will notice when you read through a lot of the discussions that the only "job" they have is showing up the day of sober and in the dress you picked. What is it that you need so much help with? All of my girls live at least an 8hr drive from me and so does my mom and FMIL, I'm doing it all myself with help from FI.

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  • I would be sad that my friend couldn't be in my wedding and then just have BMs. Nobody needs to "step up", it's not a job and not their responsibility. I think you will notice when you read through a lot of the discussions that the only "job" they have is showing up the day of sober and in the dress you picked. What is it that you need so much help with? All of my girls live at least an 8hr drive from me and so does my mom and FMIL, I'm doing it all myself with help from FI.

    I agree with this. There is no need to replace her and no need for anyone to step up. A bridesmaid "job" is to show up the day of sober and in the dress you picked.


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  • You don't need to have a MOH.  I have three good friends of 20 years and did not want to choose one over the other.  It's a tradition but not a necessity.  If you feel one has stepped up and want to give them the title that is fine but there is no need to have one.
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