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Destination Wedding - Invite/RSVP Meal Card Help

ejohnsonkejohnsonk member
First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
in Destination Weddings Discussions
Hi,

Sorry in advance this is long, there a couple factors to consider here... I am getting married 5/6/16 in Nassau, Bahamas (woo!). As part of our weekend, we are having a Welcome/Rehearsal Dinner that all resort (Sandals) guests are invited to in addition to our ceremony + reception. Both meals are sit down, NOT buffet style.. therefore guests have to RSVP and select what they want for each meal. My question is regarding invites and RSVP/ Meal Cards.

I want to see if any of you are having (or had) similar, and what the simplest way to do RSVP cards/get meal choices was. I'm looking to keep it SIMPLE and easy not only for me, but my guests! I tend to over complicate things :-) 

We have 76 people RSVP/booked for the wedding (I know.. lots of amazing people are coming, we are VERY lucky that so many people are making the financial commitment and time off to be with us). So far, everyone is staying at our resort -- no one is staying off resort. However, I have heard that a small group might rent a house or stay somewhere else. Other than the Y and possible off site guests, we pretty much know everyone who is coming or not coming, but want to send invites of course. 

The options I thought of (please note: all options will still include sending invitations to all guests invited):
1. Include RSVP cards with a simple Y___ / N___ option for just the Ceremony/Reception and Dinner to EVERYONE (without meal options included)? Then try to find another way to have the Y people chose their meals? If so, what would that be (would like to avoid sending out two separate items) 
2. OR Include simple Y __ N__ RSVP cards to ONLY people who have NOT booked (people who have booked we know their RSVP is Y). Then, for those who HAVE booked their rooms, we include RSVP cards with meal options for both events. So in this option, I would be getting 2 kinds of RSVP cards (**see below): 1 with Y/N, one with Y/N + Meals. Yes, it might be a little more work on my end sorting what goes in what envelope, but I don't mind. It would look something like this (similar to picture):

Welcome Dinner:
YES__ NO __
Meal __ Meal __

Reception Dinner:
YES__ NO __
Meal __ Meal__

Challenges/things to consider:
1. I've read it's not proper etiquette to do Welcome + Reception dinner on same RSVP Card? I don't see that a huge issue, personally.. is this true? (don't freak out on me people!! :smile: ). 
2. **Only resort guests are able to come to the Welcome Dinner, so I don't want to send Welcome Dinner RSVP and Meal Card to EVERYONE if not everyone is permitted (resort policy for this one.)

Help a girl simplify!! Thank you all for your help! 

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Re: Destination Wedding - Invite/RSVP Meal Card Help

  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    ejohnsonk said:
    Hi,

    Challenges/things to consider:
    1. I've read it's not proper etiquette to do Welcome + Reception dinner on same RSVP Card? I don't see that a huge issue, personally.. is this true? (don't freak out on me people!! :smile: ). 
    2. **Only resort guests are able to come to the Welcome Dinner, so I don't want to send Welcome Dinner RSVP and Meal Card to EVERYONE if not everyone is permitted (resort policy for this one.)

    Help a girl simplify!! Thank you all for your help! 

    Well I think you answered your own question to number one.  If people staying off resort cannot attend the welcome dinner then I would separate the two events with two different invites.  Of course if all guests end up staying onsite then this is a moot point and I don't see why you can't include two RSVPs on one card.

    The only issue I see is that you will need to send the welcome dinner invites out early enough to get back RSVPs to give a headcount to your venue.  What if people book after you send these invites?  I guess you may have to call people and invite them verbally at that point.  By the way that policy is really odd.

    How many guests are you inviting?  You say 76 have booked so how many more are left on your list?  You won't be sending invites until March so you still have some time before you need to make a final determination on the RSVP card and invites.  If everyone books at the hotel, needless to say this will be a lot easier on you.  

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  • ejohnsonkejohnsonk member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    I agree @Maggie0829 !! Thank you for your response! If everyone books at the resort, you are correct.. that is fine.

    The "policy" is complicated -- I need to confirm this and the details around it. I know for the people who are staying off resort we have to pay passes for them to come on for the day and ceremony/dinner. So people who would be coming for the welcome dinner (If they told me it was, in fact, possible) would also have to pay a full day pass for them to come to the dinner. I will follow up on the restrictions..

    Lastly, I just contacted the planner I am working with about deadline about meal selection deadlines. Last I spoke with them they require the guest meal selections 45 days in advance, which means I need to order them beginning of February (depending on where I get them, leaving a week or so to receive them, a few days for delivery and 3-4 weeks for them to respond back). Thanks again!
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  • Knottie1436436203Knottie1436436203 member
    First Comment
    Nice thread! This Information will help to me alot!! I love the cards. I like the font and that they are best sized. Thank you!
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  • ejohnsonkejohnsonk member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    @Knottie1436436203 . are you trying to do the same?

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  • Knottie1436436203Knottie1436436203 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2015
    No, no I am not trying to do the same. To be honest with you, I love envelopes, but I am too lazy to make envelopes. Seems like a lot of work (and patience) to do this!
    My friend is going to do them for his son's wedding. She will looking some information about envelopes. I will be helpful for my friend.
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  • lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    ejohnsonk said:
    I agree @Maggie0829 !! Thank you for your response! If everyone books at the resort, you are correct.. that is fine.

    The "policy" is complicated -- I need to confirm this and the details around it. I know for the people who are staying off resort we have to pay passes for them to come on for the day and ceremony/dinner. So people who would be coming for the welcome dinner (If they told me it was, in fact, possible) would also have to pay a full day pass for them to come to the dinner. I will follow up on the restrictions..

    Lastly, I just contacted the planner I am working with about deadline about meal selection deadlines. Last I spoke with them they require the guest meal selections 45 days in advance, which means I need to order them beginning of February (depending on where I get them, leaving a week or so to receive them, a few days for delivery and 3-4 weeks for them to respond back). Thanks again!
    Why in the world do they need meal selections 45 days out?  That is crazy?


    Before you answer it's an island, I will stop you.  My husband has been an exec chef on 2 different Caribbean islands.   I know a lot of chefs on other islands.  None of them need meal selections 45 days out.  That is plain crazy.



    I will something rubs me wrong that only resort guests get to come to the welcome dinner.   I get it's resort policy that you need to pay for the pass for them to come on property.  But it still rubs me wrong anyway.

    Anyway, I've seen welcome dinner RSVPs on wedding RSVPs. Never bothered me.  If not everyone is staying at the resort it would be tacky to ask to RSVP to something they are not allowed to attend.   So I would send out separate invites to the welcome dinner.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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  • ViczaesarViczaesar member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Knottie1436436203 said:
    No, no I am not trying to do the same. To be honest with you, I love envelopes, but I am too lazy to make envelopes. Seems like a lot of work (and patience) to do this!
    My friend is going to do them for his son's wedding. She will looking some information about envelopes. I will be helpful for my friend.
    Who said anything about making envelopes?



    Report Reply
  • SP29SP29 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    We didn't have a destination, but we had meal choices.

    We did our RSVP card like this:

    ____accepts
    ---declines

    ____chicken
    ____beef
    ____vegetarian
    ____kids meal

    You could have your WD on the Reception RSVP card, but that should not go out to anyone not invited to the WD, which would mean two separate cards. I think it a bit odd everyone isn't invited to the WD. I guess it is technically a separate event, so not required, but it seems odd to welcome 2/3rds of the guest list and thank them for making your DW but not the others. I feel like if your resort has a fee, that's the way it works, you chose the venue so you cover that cost for your guests. 

    If you still stick with your current plan of only inviting some to the WD, I would have the WD and Ceremony/Reception printed on two separate cards (an RSVP card for the C+R, and a separate insert for the WD) then you can provide them appropriately to each guest. 
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