Dear Prudence,
My first husband died after a long illness; for the last eight years of his life we were essentially co-parents and close friends. After he passed I began dating again; in the two years since I have gotten happily remarried. My daughter loves her stepdad and new relatives. My brother has never met my new husband and refuses to allow him in his house or meet his wife and children. Everyone who has met my husband (even my first husband’s relatives!) adore him. My brother and his wife think I and my daughter should still come over for their children’s birthdays (and bring presents). But they think I’m being unreasonable for refusing to set foot in their home until my husband is welcome. Should I suck it up and go see them without my husband? Or should I stand my ground?