Destination Weddings

Home Ceremony and Destination Wedding

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Re: Home Ceremony and Destination Wedding



  • ShesSoCold Which is why Destination wedding locations ask you if you will have a legal ceremony or a SYMBOLIC ceremony. There is NOTHING wrong with having a symbolic ceremony and getting legally married at home in your city/ county of residence. Many times it is less of a hassle to have a legal wedding where you live vs in Mexico or where ever you decide to have your ceremony! Have people forgotten that you can also get legally married at a courthouse and decide to have a wedding celebration or a full on wedding later. You never know ones circumstance so lets be respectful and not rude! 

    No. No you cannot. I mean, unless there is a divorce, which seems like way more trouble than it's worth. Do you know the definition of a wedding? Do you understand what getting married means? If people are not legally binding their lives, it's just dress-up and a skit. 

    This. I would be so embarrassed, as a wife, to pretend to be a bride and get married all over again. What a total waste of everyone's time.
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    [Deleted User]YogaSandy
  • Jells2dot0Jells2dot0 Cowtown
    Moderator Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    mod

    Jells2dot0 My family members and friends attending also have no issue with attending a symbolic ceremony. I think people are looking too deep into it! People are allowed to have their wedding the way that they want and whatever suites them and their situation. 

    If your family and friends know it's symbolic and still want to travel for it, then that is great. If you are just assuming they would be okay with it, you need to be honest with them about your intentions. It's a lot to ask a person to spend a ton of money and time to travel to a celebration they think is occurring, but it actually isn't.

     







  • Jells2dot0Jells2dot0 Cowtown
    Moderator Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    mod
    I have edited out the TOS violation. We can disagree and not attack!

     







    snowywinter
  • ShesSoCold Which is why Destination wedding locations ask you if you will have a legal ceremony or a SYMBOLIC ceremony. There is NOTHING wrong with having a symbolic ceremony and getting legally married at home in your city/ county of residence. Many times it is less of a hassle to have a legal wedding where you live vs in Mexico or where ever you decide to have your ceremony! Have people forgotten that you can also get legally married at a courthouse and decide to have a wedding celebration or a full on wedding later. You never know ones circumstance so lets be respectful and not rude! 
    No. No you cannot. I mean, unless there is a divorce, which seems like way more trouble than it's worth. Do you know the definition of a wedding? Do you understand what getting married means? If people are not legally binding their lives, it's just dress-up and a skit. 
    ^^^^ THIS. ALL OF THIS!

    Serioulsy, you can stamp your feet and throw your tiara all you want, but it will never make your SYMBOLIC mumbo jumbo any less of a FARCE. Yes, people do it all the time. It doesn't make it any less shitty. Don't come here asking for grown up opinions if you are not grown up enough to ACCEPT them when offered. We are sorry that marrying the love of your life the proper way is too much of a "hassle". Some of us don't think anything is too much of an "inconvenience" to do what is right. I went on a 9 hour each way road trip with a broken hip to obtain the necessary licensing far enough in advance (state waiting period requirements & work scheduling) so that the ceremony would be legit THAT DAY. This is a wedding, not a dog and pony show.

    [Deleted User]YogaSandy
  • Jells2dot0 My family members and friends attending also have no issue with attending a symbolic ceremony. I think people are looking too deep into it! People are allowed to have their wedding the way that they want and whatever suites them and their situation. 
    But, it's NOT YOUR WEDDING!
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    TheCheeseWench[Deleted User]YogaSandykimmiinthemitten
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    member
    If getting married at your Catholic church is important to you, then that's where your ceremony needs to be, because that is your wedding. Anything taking place in Puerto Rico would be a PPD. If you want your wedding to be in Puerto Rico, then you need to forgo a ceremony at your church.

    The choice is up to you, but you only get to choose one option-you don't get to have it both ways.
    [Deleted User]
  • justsie said:

    A wedding is a wedding. I would ABSOLUTELY not spend money to watch someone play dress up because they wanted to not do the actual work of getting married legally. This is a really poor attitude to have. 


    Are you going to lie to everyone (your nearest and dearest) about you already being married?
    I agree. If it's "easier and less of a hassle" for them to get married at home, it is much "easier and less of a hassle" for me to stay home. I am not spending thousands of dollars and giving up my vacation time (it would probably be unpaid time for me as I'm a teacher and most DWs that we have been invited to are during the school year because it's cheaper) to go on a "holiday" of your choosing just to watch you play dress up.
    [Deleted User]kimmiinthemitten
  • notice the OP never asked if you thought it was appropriate to have a real ceremony and a symbolic one?? Why is everyone so quick to judge and be rude about DW on the DW board??? Do whatever makes you happy, if your guests are cool with it who cares?
    Knottie1433791078.defunct635887248411526866
  • notice the OP never asked if you thought it was appropriate to have a real ceremony and a symbolic one?? Why is everyone so quick to judge and be rude about DW on the DW board??? Do whatever makes you happy, if your guests are cool with it who cares?

    Me thinks you doth protest too much.
    image
    [Deleted User]kimmiinthemitten
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    member
    notice the OP never asked if you thought it was appropriate to have a real ceremony and a symbolic one?? Why is everyone so quick to judge and be rude about DW on the DW board??? Do whatever makes you happy, if your guests are cool with it who cares?
    .......says the poster who chants the mantra, "Okay chill, it's my wedding day and  I will do what I want."

    [Deleted User]
  • A wedding isn't necessarily the day that you wear the white dress and dance and cut cake and take a ton of photos. It is the day that you sign that marriage license with your partner, no matter what else goes on that day. THAT is a wedding.
    redoryx[Deleted User]artbyallieCMGragain
  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten Detroit, MI
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    member

    notice the OP never asked if you thought it was appropriate to have a real ceremony and a symbolic one?? Why is everyone so quick to judge and be rude about DW on the DW board??? Do whatever makes you happy, if your guests are cool with it who cares?

    If your friend came to you with lipstick on her teeth and asked how you liked her jeans, you'd tell her about the lipstick right? OP has a bad case of lipstick but is yelling: look at my jeans!!
    image
    lc07
  • natswildnatswild The F-f-f-rozen N-n-north (Northern Alberta)
    Fourth Anniversary 250 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    member
    PP have it covered, have the ceremony AND reception at home, then have your HM in Mexico.  Not hard to understand.

  • Im finding that people on this site generally HATE the following.
    1. destination weddings where the bride and groom handle the legalities in their home country (whether or not there is a ceremony or vows exchanged)
    2. Nontraditional wedding concepts
    3. Really long engagements
    4. Calling anything an elopement if its planned

    As a bride-to-be, that has been engaged for 5 year, and planning to sign for my marriage cert in the US. and then have a destination "symbolic" ceremony for guest to attend (or not) with photos and video etc, I have been plainly discouraged from posting at all BECAUSE for the most part non-traditionalist are berated. I for one, disagree with them and think that if you are honest with your "guest and family" it should not be an issue. If you think that everyone should attend your church ceremony and THEN your destination wedding it seems like a bit much.

    My parents for one don't care if we call it a symbolic ceremony or a vow renewal or a birthday party ..they truly don't.

    US: "Mom, Dad. We're thinking about getting married in Mexico or Bali."
    Them" Thats amazing, we need a vacation! I already have a passport! But isn't it going to be a pain in the a$! to deal with legalities over there?"
    US:"We just have to do X, X and this."
    Them: "That's silly, take care of it in New York before you leave."

    (were only inviting immediate family)

    My point is marriage is evolving. It's a concept traditionally based on religion and dowery. The woman that whole heartedly want to defend their traditions and beliefs based on what marriage means to THEM are ignoring that other families and women and couples are looking at the concept differently. 

    Go ahead berate me. Cry and whine that I have upset you because a wedding is a wedding is a wedding. But there are brides that are not religious and not looking to spend 30k dollars, whose parents are divorced, and are playing a key role in the evolution of what constitutes as an "acceptable wedding". Do you girl.
    Knottie1433791078.defunct635887248411526866
  • @Jells2dot0 ;  Please close this zombie thread.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Jells2dot0Jells2dot0 Cowtown
    Moderator Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    mod
    edited January 2016
    Im finding that people on this site generally HATE the following.
    1. destination weddings where the bride and groom handle the legalities in their home country (whether or not there is a ceremony or vows exchanged)
    2. Nontraditional wedding concepts
    3. Really long engagements
    4. Calling anything an elopement if its planned

    As a bride-to-be, that has been engaged for 5 year, and planning to sign for my marriage cert in the US. and then have a destination "symbolic" ceremony for guest to attend (or not) with photos and video etc, I have been plainly discouraged from posting at all BECAUSE for the most part non-traditionalist are berated. I for one, disagree with them and think that if you are honest with your "guest and family" it should not be an issue. If you think that everyone should attend your church ceremony and THEN your destination wedding it seems like a bit much.

    My parents for one don't care if we call it a symbolic ceremony or a vow renewal or a birthday party ..they truly don't.

    US: "Mom, Dad. We're thinking about getting married in Mexico or Bali."
    Them" Thats amazing, we need a vacation! I already have a passport! But isn't it going to be a pain in the a$! to deal with legalities over there?"
    US:"We just have to do X, X and this."
    Them: "That's silly, take care of it in New York before you leave."

    (were only inviting immediate family)

    My point is marriage is evolving. It's a concept traditionally based on religion and dowery. The woman that whole heartedly want to defend their traditions and beliefs based on what marriage means to THEM are ignoring that other families and women and couples are looking at the concept differently. 

    Go ahead berate me. Cry and whine that I have upset you because a wedding is a wedding is a wedding. But there are brides that are not religious and not looking to spend 30k dollars, whose parents are divorced, and are playing a key role in the evolution of what constitutes as an "acceptable wedding". Do you girl.


    I'm not sure what site you have been reading because I eloped and PLANNED I OUT OVER A YEAR. Eloping means getting married without the knowledge of others. I planned mine out without sharing details. My parents are divorced, I did not want a traditional or religious wedding, and I was married on a beach. Guess what? That is an acceptable wedding and it was every bit real.

    People are not bashing non-traditional weddings. Etiquette is what is in question. Tradition does NOT equal etiquette. It's not appropriate to have a legal ceremony (aka your actual wedding) in one place and invite others to your re-do wedding without telling them the truth behind your intentions. Just be honest with ALL of your guests and then all is good! If you read the posts on here, you'd know that.


    Now, as for bumping an old thread to stir the pot. This thread is closed.


    edit because words are hard today


     







    Heffalump
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