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Spinoff- Drinks Dilemma- Non-Alcoholic options please!!

KnickerGoldKnickerGold member
First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Was going to post on the drinks dilemma thread, but figured I'd open a new thread to post a warning/rant about a reception that still irks me to this day!

Brides/Grooms/Wedding Hosts- if you're having a wedding with beer/wine/ signature cocktails, could you please 'splurge' for the cost of soft drinks or even iced tea? 

I was at a wedding a year or so ago and they provided about 10 beers, 2 of each- red, white and rose wines, and 4 different signature cocktails (4!), but did not include soft drinks. 

Reception was at a venue that has a full bar in the room, so the little soda handle/guns were right there, but alas, glasses were $5 each. 

As I was driving that night, and am not a big drinker I had the option of: water, from the pitcher on the table, which was warm  :s

I've been to weddings with iced tea, lemonade or water as options, and I have no issue with that!
But really, 20 alcoholic choices and 1 non-alcoholic- warm water? I really could've used a Diet Coke for some caffeine- it was a Friday night wedding, so I'd worked all day before making the 6pm ceremony/cocktail hour/awkward 30 minute gap/8pm reception- I needed a pick me up! Even iced tea would've helped!

Rant over.
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Re: Spinoff- Drinks Dilemma- Non-Alcoholic options please!!

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    lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    So run and cokes were free, but just coke was $5?     

    Well that is strange.    I've never heard of soda not being available, especially at an open bar with a soda gun right there. 






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    KnickerGoldKnickerGold member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    Well, not an 'open bar' there was a long list of what they covered- 10 beers, 6 wines and the 4 signature drinks (unsure if those had soda in them) but something off-menu would've been $$$ - like a rum and coke. I can only imagine what that cost if a coke was $5!
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    bethsmilesbethsmiles member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Wow, that's really tacky. A pretty large variety of non-alcoholic drinks are included with the price of my venue which is part of why we picked it, plus we can bring in our own alcohol so we can afford an open bar. I can't imagine making people pay even $1 for soda much less $5!


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    artbyallieartbyallie mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    While I do drink, I agree it is pretty lame and kind of tacky to not offer soda or even tea when you are serving several varieties of alcohol. Especially fountain soda, since it costs the venue almost nothing.
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    AddieCakeAddieCake member
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    That's some bullshit.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    banana468banana468 member
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    I think I was part of a thread advocating for more soft drinks and I had my rumpus handed to me for saying there should be soda offered.

    I agree with you.   So many people go for soda that to have a some available just makes sense. 
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    marsupalamimarsupalami member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    And here I was complaining about a friends wedding who only has tea and lemonade as an option.
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    Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    edited December 2015
    I wouldn't be happy if the only free non-alcoholic drink option at a wedding is warm water.
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    SP29SP29 member
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    Just like there is no requirement to have specific alcoholic drinks, there is no requirement to have specific non-alcoholic drinks- HOWEVER, non alcoholic drinks should always be offered, and covered by the hosts, just like anything else.


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    huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 member
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    SP29 said:
    Just like there is no requirement to have specific alcoholic drinks, there is no requirement to have specific non-alcoholic drinks- HOWEVER, non alcoholic drinks should always be offered, and covered by the hosts, just like anything else.


    This, and the options should be more than just water (especially warm water). That's just poor hosting. It doesn't have to be soda, but lemonade, tea, juice, something. A non alcoholic punch. Come on. 
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    monkeysipmonkeysip member
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    I went to a wedding with only tea and water for non-alcoholic options, but they did only offer a couple different wines or beer.  So overall, they were probably trying to stick to a small budget and limited options.  Which is technically fine... soda is not required by etiquette.  But as someone who doesn't really drink alcohol, I agree soda is a nice option to have!

    Just something to keep in mind brides--if you absolutely can't afford it, no worries.  But if you can squeeze it in, please provide some coke, sprite, something!

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    auriannaaurianna member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    I was once at a wedding where they had free beer, wine and soda... until after dinner. Then beer and wine were still free, but they charged $3 a cup for soda. Wtf?

    I don't think soft drinks should be required. But I think offering no non-alcoholic options is really bad planning and prioritization of funds. There should at least be lemonade or tea or soft drinks or milk or something. At the very least, water should be served in a cup with ice.
    So maybe not rude... but just... not good.
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    kittykyatkittykyat member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    edited January 2016
    My venue provides only iced tea and water with our package. Pop is $10 per person extra (stupid expensive IMO), but we are "splurging" for the exact reason you and other PPs have said. We aren't having alcohol so I wanted to at least provide a variety of other drink options. I know I would appreciate that as a guest. 

    ETA: Based on what has been communicated it sounds like its $10 per person attending, regardless of whether they get pop or not. Ugh. 
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    marsupalamimarsupalami member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    That's ridiculously high. Wow.
    We are paying 39 a person but that includes appetizers, dinner, beer, wine and soda.
    Open bar is only 5$ a person
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    SP29SP29 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    kittykyat said:
    My venue provides only iced tea and water with our package. Pop is $10 per person extra (stupid expensive IMO), but we are "splurging" for the exact reason you and other PPs have said. We aren't having alcohol so I wanted to at least provide a variety of other drink options. I know I would appreciate that as a guest. 

    ETA: Based on what has been communicated it sounds like its $10 per person attending, regardless of whether they get pop or not. Ugh. 
    That is a price gouge -_-. Even if *every* guest drank ALL the pop, it doesn't cost them $10 per person. 
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    STARMOON44STARMOON44 member
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    Knottie52027636 said:

    That's ridiculously high. Wow.
    We are paying 39 a person but that includes appetizers, dinner, beer, wine and soda.
    Open bar is only 5$ a person


    That's ridiculously low. Wow.

    ? Welcome KnottieNumbers! Turns out people on here are from all over, and just calling what they spend ridiculous is not at all useful.
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    marsupalamimarsupalami member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    I wasn't calling what they are spending ridiculous. I was stating I felt that was a high price IMO.
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    KnickerGoldKnickerGold member
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    kittykyat said:
    My venue provides only iced tea and water with our package. Pop is $10 per person extra (stupid expensive IMO), but we are "splurging" for the exact reason you and other PPs have said. We aren't having alcohol so I wanted to at least provide a variety of other drink options. I know I would appreciate that as a guest. 

    ETA: Based on what has been communicated it sounds like its $10 per person attending, regardless of whether they get pop or not. Ugh. 
    Ya, I wasn't saying 'you must have soda' but at least something non-alcoholic! I mean ice water would've been a plus. Tea- a gift, but no, only the 20 alcoholic options.

    I can see in your case why the price might be 'high'-- if you're only planning on tea/lemonade (fine!) those can be stored more easily than say soda. So there may be more cost involved. 
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    poodledoodleooopoodledoodleooo member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    My venue was stupid expensive about the soda but we added tea, and punch or lemonade (I can't remember if it was both or either or) and ALL were located in an ICED beverage dispenser thing!

    Definitely a solid PSA, though! Keep in mind that non-drinkers will want to have a little fun with their beverages too!
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