Sex disappointment

JeeGooDowster · January 2016

Congrats on a healthy grandson. I wish a healthy and smooth delivery for your daughter.

I'm 34 and just had my first baby in June. I wanted to have a boy first (i also wanted a girl but just wanted to get the pressure of having a boy over and done with)...so when my doctor told me it was a girl (at 3 months pregnant)...I was disappointed for about a 2 days. I soon got over it and was anticipating the arrival of my baby girl.

Now, i can't imagine life without her and I'm in love. I almost feel guilty for being disappointed, but it happens.

flantastic · January 2016

mrsdowster said:

Congrats on a healthy grandson. I wish a healthy and smooth delivery for your daughter.

I'm 34 and just had my first baby in June. I wanted to have a boy first (i also wanted a girl but just wanted to get the pressure of having a boy over and done with)...so when my doctor told me it was a girl (at 3 months pregnant)...I was disappointed for about a 2 days. I soon got over it and was anticipating the arrival of my baby girl.

Now, i can't imagine life without her and I'm in love. I almost feel guilty for being disappointed, but it happens.

Why would there be pressure to have a boy but not to have a girl?

KatWAG · January 2016

flantastic said:

mrsdowster said:

Congrats on a healthy grandson. I wish a healthy and smooth delivery for your daughter.

I'm 34 and just had my first baby in June. I wanted to have a boy first (i also wanted a girl but just wanted to get the pressure of having a boy over and done with)...so when my doctor told me it was a girl (at 3 months pregnant)...I was disappointed for about a 2 days. I soon got over it and was anticipating the arrival of my baby girl.

Now, i can't imagine life without her and I'm in love. I almost feel guilty for being disappointed, but it happens.

Why would there be pressure to have a boy but not to have a girl?

Because only boys can carry on the family name, duh!

JeeGooDowster · January 2016

stupid reasons for example like what @katwag mentions and other superstitions. I'm Chinese and so is my husband. Elders in our family have annoying superstitions like "having a boy is better" "having a boy is good luck" hearing about it is just as annoying.

But as i mentioned before, I got over it really quick and didn't care what anyone else thought or said.

CMGragain · January 2016

mrsdowster said:

Congrats on a healthy grandson. I wish a healthy and smooth delivery for your daughter.

I'm 34 and just had my first baby in June. I wanted to have a boy first (i also wanted a girl but just wanted to get the pressure of having a boy over and done with)...so when my doctor told me it was a girl (at 3 months pregnant)...I was disappointed for about a 2 days. I soon got over it and was anticipating the arrival of my baby girl.

Now, i can't imagine life without her and I'm in love. I almost feel guilty for being disappointed, but it happens.

I think that this is what is also bothering my daughter. She knows that she shouldn't feel disappointed, but she still does, and that makes her feel guilty.
Some of the things she said that she would miss are fantasies of shopping, mimosas and manicures together. Ha! As a child, she HATED shopping; we only had mimosas at her wedding; and we never had manicures! She is a strong feminist (Did she have a role model?) and I think she will be the perfect woman to raise two boys to respect women as human beings.

flantastic · January 2016

CMGragain said:

mrsdowster said:

Congrats on a healthy grandson. I wish a healthy and smooth delivery for your daughter.

I'm 34 and just had my first baby in June. I wanted to have a boy first (i also wanted a girl but just wanted to get the pressure of having a boy over and done with)...so when my doctor told me it was a girl (at 3 months pregnant)...I was disappointed for about a 2 days. I soon got over it and was anticipating the arrival of my baby girl.

Now, i can't imagine life without her and I'm in love. I almost feel guilty for being disappointed, but it happens.

I think that this is what is also bothering my daughter. She knows that she shouldn't feel disappointed, but she still does, and that makes her feel guilty.
Some of the things she said that she would miss are fantasies of shopping, mimosas and manicures together. Ha! As a child, she HATED shopping; we only had mimosas at her wedding; and we never had manicures! She is a strong feminist (Did she have a role model?) and I think she will be the perfect woman to raise two boys to respect women as human beings.

There's no guarantee a girl would have liked those things either, so all in all, I think everybody needs to understand that they may need to let go of those ideas anyway. It is what it is.

CMGragain · January 2016

I will give her one point, though. It is more fun to dress little girls than to dress little boys. I have a box of all the handmade smocked dresses that I made for her in the early 1980s. Maybe I'll get a great-granddaughter, someday, but I won't be around to see that.

TrixieJess · January 2016

CMGragain said:
I will give her one point, though. It is more fun to dress little girls than to dress little boys. I have a box of all the handmade smocked dresses that I made for her in the early 1980s. Maybe I'll get a great-granddaughter, someday, but I won't be around to see that.

I don't know about that, I love going through the boxes of hand-me-downs and seeing all the cute shirts and pants for boys. You can also accesorize boys with hats, ties and shoes.

ShesSoCold · January 2016

TrixieJess said:

I will give her one point, though. It is more fun to dress little girls than to dress little boys. I have a box of all the handmade smocked dresses that I made for her in the early 1980s. Maybe I'll get a great-granddaughter, someday, but I won't be around to see that.
I don't know about that, I love going through the boxes of hand-me-downs and seeing all the cute shirts and pants for boys. You can also accesorize boys with hats, ties and shoes.

There is nothing cuter than a little boy in a suit and tie. Sure girls in their dresses are cute, but boys in ties are the best ever.

Heffalump · January 2016

Nobody loves their mommas like little boys. I don't mean to stereotype, but I see a lot more drama between moms and daughters than between moms and sons. So think of all the teenaged eyerolls and dramatic sighs and door slams she won't have to deal with.

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TrixieJess · January 2016

Heffalump said:

Nobody loves their mommas like little boys. I don't mean to stereotype, but I see a lot more drama between moms and daughters than between moms and sons. So think of all the teenaged eyerolls and dramatic sighs and door slams she won't have to deal with.

Meh, my 17 year old brother could prove this wrong in so many ways. I gave him a tiara one year for his birthday because he's such a drama queen. As well, that boy can slam a door with the rest of them. If only he could do a soul scorching witty retort to go with any of the attitude he gives his mother.

CMGragain · January 2016

Well, I've done both. I bought my teenage son a tuxedo because he performed in a jazz band that played evening jobs, and in a symphony orchestra.
Sorry, but buying my daughter's wedding dress was a bigger thrill. And the little dresses were cuter, too.

huskypuppy14 · January 2016

Heffalump said:

Nobody loves their mommas like little boys. I don't mean to stereotype, but I see a lot more drama between moms and daughters than between moms and sons. So think of all the teenaged eyerolls and dramatic sighs and door slams she won't have to deal with.

Then don't stereotype. I don't have brothers, but I know a lot of men that must have been/were drama llamas as teenagers.

Now, I as a teenager definitely had the eye roll down, but we weren't allowed to slam doors in our house. Teenagers eye roll, it's not specific to girls.

CMGragain · January 2016

Damage done by DD's teenage temper tantrums:
Kicked hole in the wall.
Threw a full plastic clothes hamper at me.
Broke a large picture in my bedroom.
Endless screaming fits of "I hate you!"

I survived, and we are now very close.

Damage done by DS' teenage temper tantrums:
None
Screaming tantrums: None
One physical fight with Dad - Dad won. (He didn't hit back, he just pinned the kid.) DS still feels guilty about it.

MobKaz · January 2016

Again, my opinions may be biased because I grew up in a male dominated family.

My son could have a house full of friends in the basement and I might not even realize it. My daughter might have one friend over and the bickering, whining, and drama would begin five minutes after play started.

I have always been more fond of purchasing clothing for boys. I have never been a "girly girl", and dreaded when I would need to actually make a dress purchase for DD. I never cared for the colors pink or purple, either. I have probably already purchased at least 40 outfits for impending grandson. I do make clothing purchases for the granddaughter, but at the age of 18 months, have yet to buy her a dress. She can really rock the Osh Kosh, however!

drunkenwitch · January 2016

Look at this way, my mom got the girl she wanted but not tbe daughter she wanted. It took her decades to accept me for who I am and stop trying to force me into the role of "her perfect daughter ".

madamerwin · January 2016

Heffalump said:

Nobody loves their mommas like little boys. I don't mean to stereotype, but I see a lot more drama between moms and daughters than between moms and sons. So think of all the teenaged eyerolls and dramatic sighs and door slams she won't have to deal with.

I can't really speak for teenage boys, but as one of four sisters, I know my mom had it rough when we were teenagers. I am sure boys can be just as bad (actually, I know H was no peach to his parents as a teen, mostly drama with his dad), but I don't know how my mom handled us four girls. Looking back, we were awful.

Whenever we asked my mom what she wanted for her birthday/Christmas, she would say, without missing a beat, "Peace on earth, Kentucky Fried Chicken, and for my children to love me when they're 16." We did love her, but we were still assholes.

tigerlily6 · January 2016

I am the only girl with two brothers. Both of them and my mom have scrapped with my mom far more than I did as teenagers (both left the house to move in with friends for periods due to conflicts, got in shouting matches, said some pretty hurtful things, etc), so a lot of it is personalities, I think. I've definitely had arguments with my parents, but for the most part I just kind of kept my head down until I was out of the house.

As a former high school teacher, however, I will say that if you have to deal with drama of any kind, I would generally take boy drama over girl drama any day. Most guys when they're pissy are just rude butts. Girls tended to get vicious and spiteful and refused to move past anything.