The art of "bean dipping".

Re: The art of "bean dipping".

• poodledoodleooo member

  

  February 2016 edited February 2016

  I'd probably just be like "Yeah, it really is too bad. I'm glad they're understanding!"
  
  ETA: I feel like she can't argue if you're agreeing with her and if she does come back with "well can't you at least try to make room for them?" or some other request, just say, "Sorry, we can't. It sucks but it is what it is."
  

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• ShesSoCold mod

  

  February 2016

  DarthV8r said:

  My FSIL texted me the other day. She basically said it's too bad I didn't have enough room at the wedding to invite her sister and brother in law because they really wanted to attend. 
  I didn't reply back. It's been 4 days because I just can't figure out what to say. I really want to mend the relationship between FSIL and I.  We recently started fresh after a disagreement we had 7 years ago. She held it in for years and I had no idea. 
  
  what do I do now? 
  

  
  Wait...is this your fiancé's brother's wife who is texting you? About her sister and her sister's husband?

  I barely know my brother's SIL's name, let alone would have invited her to my wedding.

  
  

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• DarthV8r member

  

  February 2016

  ShesSoCold said:

  DarthV8r said:

  My FSIL texted me the other day. She basically said it's too bad I didn't have enough room at the wedding to invite her sister and brother in law because they really wanted to attend. 
  I didn't reply back. It's been 4 days because I just can't figure out what to say. I really want to mend the relationship between FSIL and I.  We recently started fresh after a disagreement we had 7 years ago. She held it in for years and I had no idea. 
  
  what do I do now? 
  

  
  Wait...is this your fiancé's brother's wife who is texting you? About her sister and her sister's husband?

  I barely know my brother's SIL's name, let alone would have invited her to my wedding.

  
  

  STIB

  Yes, you are right. We were in the same social circle and the husband of  my FSIL's sister is my FI's first cousin. 

  oy, it sounds so confusing. 

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• jacques27 member

  

  February 2016

  I'd probably go with something like "That's so sweet of them to think of us and want to share in this day.  The wedding plans are already set, but I really look forward to getting together with them soon."  You could add a "Let's plan a get-together soon!" if you want.  You could also expand on that and suggest something like a cookout when the weather gets nice or a game night or what have you. 

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• drunkenwitch member

  

  February 2016

  This might be the cynical side of me, oh who I am kidding, every side is cynical, it sounds like she's baiting you for a fight. Just ignore it. If she tries to bait you again just sigh sadly and say "I know, there are so many people we wanted to invite but we've reached capacity.  Hey, have you seen this adorable puppy video?"

  

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• SP29 member

  

  February 2016

  Don't feel bad about this.
  
  It is rude on FSIL's end to try and invite other guests to your event. I also find it weird she's fishing for an invite for her sister and BIL... now that you explain it, it makes a bit more sense, but still- not everyone can be invited to every wedding.
  
  You don't not owe anyone an invitation.
  
  I like Jacque's wording. Get together with them another time if you are all friends, otherwise, bean dip, bean dip, bean dip!
  

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• kayteekay85 member

  

  February 2016

  drunkenwitch said:

  This might be the cynical side of me, oh who I am kidding, every side is cynical, it sounds like she's baiting you for a fight. Just ignore it. If she tries to bait you again just sigh sadly and say "I know, there are so many people we wanted to invite but we've reached capacity.  Hey, have you seen this adorable puppy video?"

  My thoughts exactly. Sounds like she's baiting yo for an argument. 

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• holyguacamole79 member

  

  February 2016 edited February 2016

  FSIL:
  
  
  
  I'd pick up the phone and call her so that nothing is lost via text.  Say,  "I'm so sorry that I'm just now getting back to you.   I'm flattered that they want to join us, but we can't accommodate them.   How are you, by the way?   I saw your new haircut on Instagram  ... I love it! "

  
  
  
  
  

  

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