Dear Prudence,
I am the perpetually single friend. Now in my mid-to-late 20s, I think I finally met someone great. Things had been progressing perfectly for a few months until on a recent afternoon he confessed that he is married to his roommate, his best friend’s older sister. He is an immigrant and while I thought he had gotten a green card through the lottery, he is actually getting it through this marriage. It is strictly a business arrangement. Their relationship is closer to that of siblings than anything else. They are about one year into the marriage, with one left to go. I don’t feel jealous. And I’m actually really glad he trusts me with this huge burden he has been carrying. I would never want to jeopardize his immigration status. But I’m struggling with understanding what this could mean for our future. We want a lot of the same things and before this I was thinking that maybe I had finally found the right person. I want to take pictures, take vacations, and introduce him to family. I want to make him part of my life and for the next year I don’t know that will be possible to the extent that I want. What should I do?