Wedding Etiquette Forum

Vendor Tipping

Our venue takes care of everything- food, bar, cake, DJ, etc.  The only thing we had to take care of was hair/makeup, photographer, and officiant.  I asked the venue coordinator how they handle vendor tips (since it is all under one company) and she told us not to tip anything.  Is that rude?  Should I tip anyways?  

Re: Vendor Tipping

  • Our venue takes care of everything- food, bar, cake, DJ, etc.  The only thing we had to take care of was hair/makeup, photographer, and officiant.  I asked the venue coordinator how they handle vendor tips (since it is all under one company) and she told us not to tip anything.  Is that rude?  Should I tip anyways?  
    Is there a line item for gratuities in the contract? It's likely already built into your cost and their payroll system.
  • Second checking the contract. 

    But if someone truly makes your wedding memorable (the chatty bartender that flipped bottles to make cool cockatils, the dj that made played grammas favorite songs etc.) $20 discreetly handed out would be good I think.


  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited September 2016
    Most Knotties know that I love cruising, and on most cruises, tips are charged to my account, $13 per day per person.  I pay these at the end of the cruise with my bill UNLESS the tips are pre-paid in my cruise contract.  This is sometimes part of the deal when I sign up.
    Example:  Hawaii cruise,  $26 X 15 days =$390 total tips from us.  (Ouch!)
                     Japanese cruise, pre-paid gratuities = $0 from us.  (Just signed up for this for next year!  My kids are so jealous!)

    We always give our room steward extra cash in an envelope, which they get to keep for themselves, as long as the tips are paid.

    Like the others told you, check your contract to see if tips are pre-paid.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Hi, I have the same question about tipping. My reception location does not include gratuity on the contract but there is a 19% service charge. The service charge explicitly states that it is not gratuity and that any tipping is voluntary and at my discretion. I've seen tipping etiquette say give 15-20% of food cost for the wait staff and 10-15% of bar cost for the bartenders. I've also seen that you can give a set amount per server/bartender. Is it rude to ask my event manager about the tipping procedure and how many wait staff/bartenders will be working my wedding?
  • cmcginni2 said:
    Hi, I have the same question about tipping. My reception location does not include gratuity on the contract but there is a 19% service charge. The service charge explicitly states that it is not gratuity and that any tipping is voluntary and at my discretion. I've seen tipping etiquette say give 15-20% of food cost for the wait staff and 10-15% of bar cost for the bartenders. I've also seen that you can give a set amount per server/bartender. Is it rude to ask my event manager about the tipping procedure and how many wait staff/bartenders will be working my wedding?
    Tipping is a thank you for exceptional service, therefore it's never rude to ask about how tipping is handled.
    image
  • cmcginni2 said:
    Hi, I have the same question about tipping. My reception location does not include gratuity on the contract but there is a 19% service charge. The service charge explicitly states that it is not gratuity and that any tipping is voluntary and at my discretion. I've seen tipping etiquette say give 15-20% of food cost for the wait staff and 10-15% of bar cost for the bartenders. I've also seen that you can give a set amount per server/bartender. Is it rude to ask my event manager about the tipping procedure and how many wait staff/bartenders will be working my wedding?
    Gratuity was not included in our contract so I ended up calling the company we are working with to ask her about tipping. She was great about it, I never got the vibe that it was a rude question.  Her suggestion for the servers/bar tenders was to tip based on our guest count, $3-5 a guest.  Then the staff splits it up evenly among themselves.   She said other vendors like DJs are trickier because she generally only sees envelopes passed, without ever really knowing what amount is in them but suggested a $50-$100 tip.  I think this may be on the lower end of tipping amounts, honestly, but helpful info nonetheless.
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