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advice on getting grandma to stop forwarding racist emails?

My Grandmother is an Obama birther, the-Clintons-have-people-murdered forwarding email sharer. I have, as kindly as possible, asked every time she sends me one, to stop, and when possible, have included an corresponding link to Snopes. I had previously done this while Replying All, but she's recently started BCCing so I can't shame her stupid beliefs with the rest of the folks she emails anymore. She is also a retired University employee and does this from her .edu email, which seems inappropriate. Any advice to get her to knock it off? I don't want to block her email entirely because sometimes she sends things I'd like to get (non chain emails) but she doesn't respect me enough to stop when I've asked kindly.

Re: advice on getting grandma to stop forwarding racist emails?

  • Grandmama, stop sending me racist emails. 

    And if that doesn't work either block her or just delete them. There is no way to change a determined forwarder of dumb emails. 
  • Start reporting them as spam.  
    Married 9.12.15
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  • Grandma, I have asked you numerous times to stop sending me racist emails. If I receive another one, I will block you email which means I may not receive important correspondence you choose to send.  Your choice.
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  • "Grandma - please stop sending me these political emails. I've asked you to stop X times. If you send another one, I'm going to block your email address. I'd rather not do that, so please respect my request. Love you, kylexo"
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  • Many people in our family had to block Uncle Ed's e-mails.  They were ridiculous and offensive.  Too bad his choices led to family estrangement.  By the time he died, no one was speaking to him.  Very sad.
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  • It depends on how your relationship is with her aside from the emails. If you're close but get frustrated by the things she says and forwards, I would just delete the emails.  She's unlikely to change or be less stubborn at this stage in her life.  I would either try to engage her in a face-to-face discussion about her views or just ignore it.  

    Not the same situation, but my dad says a lot of things that I don't agree with that come across as close-minded and bigoted.  It's especially embarrassing if we're eating dinner at my parents' house and other friends are invited.  When I was younger I would get worked up and try to get him to see my viewpoint, now I just attempt to ignore it and change the subject because I know he can't be reasoned with on certain topics.  Even if everyone at the table disagrees with him, they're willing to overlook his views and love him anyway.
  • Just a thought, but is this relatively new behavior? If so, she could have a health problem so that she doesn't know what she is doing is unacceptable? If that isn't the case, I agree with @vikinganna87.
  • kylexokylexo member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    edited September 2016
    It's been going on for awhile. We got in a fight about it once because I responded with a Snopes link and let her know that I loved and respected her as a family member but preferred she stop sharing these with me as we don't see eye to eye on it. I also pointed out numberous grammatical and spelling errors in addition to the factual errors and said something to the effect of: "you are such an intelligent woman whom I admire, it's really disheartening that you pass along this dishonest crap as fact, particularly when it looks as if it were written by a 3rd grader with a wild imagination." her response was to highlight and correct a tiny grammatical error I made in the response with nothing else. she has not slowed the sharing of crap emails.
  • Have you had an in person conversation with her about it?
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • Have you had an in person conversation with her about it?
    ha! yeah I have. she first railed on about how young people are ruining the country for older people like her, people with brown skin are lower, my nose piercing made me look like an animal BUT it was too bad i was a big girl cause i have a cute face. the kicker was she felt this was an appropriate conversation to have with me 3 days before the wedding.

    in getting this feedback on my interactions with her, i've done some reflecting. i think if not for my mom and her wanting to maintain the peace i would probably cut grandma out of my life since she's pretty toxic. i know my moms relationship with grandma is important and it's important to mom that her kids have a relationship with grandma, but maybe it's more important that i stand up for myself and set boundaries on that relationship.
  • it's frustrating when you talk to her in person about politics cause she just gets nasty, makes personal attacks and thinks anyone who disagrees with her is an idiot who is trying to ruin her country.

    i might not handle political discussions perfectly, but i am also smart enough to know that calling someone who disagrees with my politics an idiot is the last way for them to ever give a shit about my position. i think education and swaying happens way more frequently by kindly and gently opening peoples eyes to why things are viewed differently and humanizing it for them. sometimes i think grandma just likes to be nasty to people for the sake of being nasty.
  • Ugh, I feel for you. I had a great aunt like that. Well, I have a great aunt like that. She treated everyone around her like absolute shit. From when I was probably 12 - 18 she was just horrible. Telling me that I needed to scrub my face until my skin was raw so no one has to look at my acne, telling me I was fat, I should wear more layers to cover my body type, etc. I was 18 when I stopped going to see her and help her out. I felt so much better. She's still alive but no one in the family has seen or spoken to her in years. When my mom was dying, somehow she heard about it and sent my mom a letter. The first line was "I'm sorry you didn't tell me you were sick".

    You don't have to have a relationship with her, of any kind, if you don't want to. Your mom may be upset, but your own happiness is more important. But if you do, I do agree with the suggestion of just deleting the emails and ignoring them.

    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • Didn't read all the responses. However, my grandma used to do this to me all the time. Once I sent her a snoopes link. They still came. However, another time while I was visiting her, she made a stereotypical comment and I called her out on it. Ever since then the emails have stopped. To me. Awhile after the emails stopped DH said something about a "poem" forwarded email that my grandma sent to us. I told him I didn't get it. He pulled it up in his email. I showed him I didn't get it. He became a bit concerned wondering if she thought he shared her ideas. I told him it was probably only because I called her out and made my feelings very well known. So, I was able to get her to stop sending them to me.
  • I train people the way I train animals.

    When my H's grandfather sends me emails like this, I simply don't open and delete them. When he sends nice "letter" style emails asking about us, I reply promptly with a pleasant response.

    Ignore bad behavior and reward good behavior. She'll either stop sending them, or she won't, but it doesn't have to bother you. Good luck :)
  • "Gran, these letters are racist and untrue. You are welcome to your beliefs but I will not tolerate bigoted or racist lies. Please stop sending them to me or I will have to cut back on our communication. " Next time she sends them, block her. 
  • "Grandma, I really don't appreciate getting these emails. Please stop sending them to me. If I get them anymore, I'm going to report them to the email administrator at the university and block them going into my email box." Then follow through.
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