Just Engaged and Proposals

Just engaged!

Hey everyone I am recently engaged and I'm trying to figure out when is the best time to ask my girls to be a part of my bridal party? Our wedding is not u til August 18,2018. I also would like to know of everyone's ideas on bridesmaid proposals! 
lizbellabride

Re: Just engaged!

  • Rule of thumb and what any wedding planning book will tell you is not to ask until 8 months before your wedding date.  A lot can change in 2 years.   

    Pinterest is a great way to get ideas, but IMHO nothing beats personally asking each member, just one-on-one, without all the fanfare.  

    Congrats and good luck!
    Anniversary
    kimmiinthemitten
  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    member
    edited November 2016
    Hey everyone I am recently engaged and I'm trying to figure out when is the best time to ask my girls to be a part of my bridal party? Our wedding is not u til August 18,2018. I also would like to know of everyone's ideas on bridesmaid proposals! 
    Congratulations on your engagement!
    DO NOT ask anyone to be in your wedding party until about eight to ten months before your wedding.  This means not before December 2017!  Most of the drama we see on the board is about brides who want to get rid of a bridesmaid because they are no longer friends.  Once you ask someone, you cannot take it back.
    Slow down.  Enjoy your engagement.  Start thinking about what kind of BUDGET you will have, and talk to your FI about what you both want for a wedding.  Read a good book about wedding etiquette.  I like Miss Manners' Guide to a Surprisingly Dignified Wedding.  It is a bit conservative, but generally favors budget weddings, and it is funny!

    Bridesmaid proposals?  What?  Just ask them - next year.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    lizbellabride
  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten Detroit, MI
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary 5 Answers
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    Congrats and welcome to The Knot. 

    Change your name and stick around. This is a great resource!
    image
  • Definitely heed the advice about waiting until it is closer to ask your wedding party!  I asked a couple of people right away when I got engaged because I didn't know any better back then, and I kind of wish I could take one of those back.  No hellish high-drama falling-out or anything, just not feeling as close to her as I was a year ago.  Of course I'm not going to kick her out, but if I had waited for a more reasonable time frame I probably would have made a different choice.

    Add me to the list of people who thinks "bridesmaid proposals" are borderline absurd.  What's wrong with a one-one-one heartfelt statement that this person is one of the people you care about most and you hope they will stand up with you at the wedding?  
  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    member
    edited November 2016
    I don't think I ever posted about my daughter's MOH.  When daughter telephoned her, they hadn't seen each other for a few years.  Daughter said, "Sue, do you remember when we were in high school and we talked about being bridesmaids at each others wedding...?"  The response was, "You're engaged? Woo-hoo! Bitch, you BETTER ask me to be your bridesmaid!"  Not exactly Miss Manners, but I thought it was funny.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Keisha84Keisha84
    Third Anniversary 100 Love Its 10 Comments First Answer
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    edited November 2016
    My wedding isn't till 2018 and I planning on asking my BP soon. My maid of honor is my friend of 17 years. I don't see anything changing in our friendship. My other bridesmaids are my sister and my future sister in law. 

    If I was asking friends I didn't know as long I would wait longer before asking them to be bridesmaids. 

    *I put the wrong wedding year lol 
  • Hey everyone I am recently engaged and I'm trying to figure out when is the best time to ask my girls to be a part of my bridal party? Our wedding is not u til August 18,2018. I also would like to know of everyone's ideas on bridesmaid proposals! 
    HEY we have the same wedding date!!!!

    I'm going to be asking my bridal party pretty quickly. I just got engaged on Sunday, and some of them kinda already know they'll be in the bridal party cause we've talked about it before.

    But I of course would like to formally ask them, and I'm going to be doing the bridesmaid gift boxes, so it'll probably be once I have those all together, and then any time I see them!

    Whenever it feels right to you, basically. It's YOUR wedding! 
    8.18.18 <3
  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    member
    edited September 20
    Hey everyone I am recently engaged and I'm trying to figure out when is the best time to ask my girls to be a part of my bridal party? Our wedding is not u til August 18,2018. I also would like to know of everyone's ideas on bridesmaid proposals! 
    HEY we have the same wedding date!!!!

    I'm going to be asking my bridal party pretty quickly. I just got engaged on Sunday, and some of them kinda already know they'll be in the bridal party cause we've talked about it before.

    But I of course would like to formally ask them, and I'm going to be doing the bridesmaid gift boxes, so it'll probably be once I have those all together, and then any time I see them!

    Whenever it feels right to you, basically. It's YOUR wedding! 
    I'm sorry, but this is terrible advice!  I cannot tell you how many tearful posts we get on The Knot because a bride jumped the gun and asked her bridal party too early.  It is one of the most common problems we see.

    Generally we advise brides to ask their wedding party no more than TEN MONTHS before the wedding ceremony, so @kristinalynn91, you are not too far off that schedule.   This gives the ladies plenty of time to select their dresses, and you will be less likely to have bridal party regrets.

    This thread is from 2016.  You should really start a new thread if you have questions.  We wil be happy to help you.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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