Should I register or not?

Re: Should I register or not?

• Cookie Pusher member

  

  December 2016

  Just don't register, and if anyone specifically asks what you want, you can say you don't need anything but are saving up for a house. Most people know cash is a great gift. Some people may still insist on giving a physical gift, but most will take the hint if you don't have a registry. We didn't register (we lived together for 10 years before we got married so didn't need any housewares). Everyone who gave us a gift did so with cash, checks, or giftcards. 

  ~*~*~*~*~

  
  

  Report5 Reply
• charlotte989875 member

  

  December 2016

  Knottie1473119282 said:

  Out of all the aspects of wedding planning, deciding whether of not to register has by far been one of the most tedious tasks. My FH and I are moving in with his parents to save some extra money before the wedding and we hope to look for a house soon after the wedding. I really would love to register for all the cute home things in the world, but we don't have a home yet so we wouldn't have anywhere to put the gifts and opting to a storage units worries with with nice, new things. I would not want my guests to spend money on gifts for them to sit in a storage unit until we buy a house. We do not plan on going on a honeymoon right after the wedding either so we wouldn't do one of those Honeymoon funds. I really would just prefer for them to give money as a gift to help us with buying a house. I really do not want to ask for money though! It sounds rude to me. Do I just not register anywhere and have a "Cards" box at the wedding? If I don't register will just assume that money is the best option? How do I go about this? (Do not rip my head off for wanting money, weddings are expensive! Thanks)
  
  Advice is appreciated!

  Just don't register. Think of it this way, when you are ready to buy a house and furnish it, there will be new designs/products/styles that you might like better, and until you find a house you won't know what will fit. By waiting you'll get exactly what you want. 
  
  So don't register, people will get the hint and give you cash/checks. If they ask tell them you're saving up to buy a house and won't know what you need until then. 

  Report2 Reply
• SP29 member

  

  December 2016

  Agree with the above.
  
  No registry- most people will get it. There will be some people who will only ever give a physical gift, but once you receive that gift it is up to you to decide what to do with it; keep it, store it, return it, donate it, etc. If you think your crowd is made up of a few of these people, you *could* create a small registry with a few items you know you'll need/want, such as towels, or a picture frame for one of your wedding photos.
  
  Yes, it is rude to ask for money, but not rude to say, "No, we aren't registered anywhere but we are saving up for a house".
  

  Report1 Reply
• STARMOON44 member

  

  December 2016

  I would just add that if you don't want physical gifts you should skip a shower 

  Report3 Reply
• ernursej member

  

  December 2016

  We didn't register and only received one 'boxed' gift. The rest were gift cards, cash and cheques. People will get the hint if you don't have a registry.

  Report1 Reply
• charlotte989875 member

  

  December 2016

  MelCar2 said:

  If you would like to request money from your guests, there is a way to do it tastefully. Have you already created a registry yet? If not, I would suggest using a universal gift registry service. We used MyRegistry.com because we were able to add individual items from different stores as well as have our honeymoon fund on the registry in the event people preferred to give us cash instead. It's nice because your guests will feel like they have options instead of feeling obligated to just give you cash!

  
  

  This is pretty poor advice. Asking for money, as part of a honeymoon fund, gift cards, or as part of a universal registry is still pretty rude. Your guests know how to give cash if that's what they want to do, without you asking for it. 

  Report9 Reply
• charlotte989875 member

  

  December 2016

  You're still asking for cash. That's still rude. Even if it's listed with toasters and glasses. I'm sure that you did like it, many brides do. But that doesn't mean your guests like it. Many may find it rude that you're asking them for cash. 

  Report1 Reply
• CMGragain member

  

  December 2016 edited December 2016

  MelCar2 said:

  I did not feel that way. There were a lot of things on my registry and if someone preferred to contribute to my honeymoon as opposed to getting me linens or an appliance, that was their choice. But it wasn’t pushy or tacky because MyRegistry is not a cash registry, so I really liked it a lot.

  What YOU feel about it is irrelevant.  It is how it make your GUESTS fell that is important.  Many will find it rude and greedy of you.  It is no different that asking for cash.
  So, you don't care about your guests opinions of you?
  

  

  Report0 Reply