Attire & Accessories Forum

Updating an Heirloom Ring

My fiancé's grandmother recently gave me her late husband's wedding band. It was a beautiful gesture and my fiancé really wants to wear it (his full name has been passed down for 5 generations, so tradition is very important to him). We have a few dilemmas, though:

1) The band is gold and does not match my (sterling) silver engagement ring
2) It must be resized larger and the ring is already very thin
3) We are young college students on a VERY tight budget

We have no issue with altering the ring in any way. Ideas?

Re: Updating an Heirloom Ring

  • #3 is the most important here as it tells us "old fogies" here where you're "at" in life.  Which is a challenge for #1 and 2.  The "easy solution" would be to have a custom jeweler "wrap" the vintage ring with gold to strengthen and resize it if it's already worn thin.  Vintage rings in general were made considerably thinner than the rings of today, so that's something to consider.  #1 TRULY in the real world - DOES NOT MATTER!!!  Many couples don't even wear their rings because of careers that don't allow jewelry or if they do it must be absolutely plain.  DH's ring looks nothing like mine - we each chose rings that we liked even though DH has only worn it a handful of times since we've been married (guess what - we're still married!)..  

    This is one of the areas that you're making a long-term investment in regards to the wedding because in order to use it as his wedding ring it has to be at minimum resized.  It's best to not go cheap because it is an heirloom.  
  • Yep, agree with PPs. Consult a jeweler to see what your options are - an heirloom is not something you want to damage. The color doesn't matter. I know plenty of people who have different color rings or one doesn't wear a ring at all. NBD.
  • My fiancé's grandmother recently gave me her late husband's wedding band. It was a beautiful gesture and my fiancé really wants to wear it (his full name has been passed down for 5 generations, so tradition is very important to him). We have a few dilemmas, though:

    1) The band is gold and does not match my (sterling) silver engagement ring
    This doesn't matter at all!  (My rings are white gold, husbands is black carbon with a tungsten outside...it can't be resized but it was only $20 so there's that)

    2) It must be resized larger and the ring is already very thin
    This can be done, but you will need to find a good reputable jeweler and don't skimp.  You don't want to destroy the ring.

    3) We are young college students on a VERY tight budget
    Try getting a "cheaper" band for now and then resize when you have the money.  I understand that some people will object to this idea, but at the end of the day it is "only a ring".  You will be no more or less married regardless of what he wears.

    We have no issue with altering the ring in any way. Ideas?
    If you want him to wear the ring daily, you could place it on a nice quality necklace and wear it that way, then just re-size when you have the funding.
  • If he loves it and wants to wear it as is, your easiest and cheapest option is just to get it sized to fit. It doesn't have to match your ring. (Plus, sterling is not as durable as gold anyway, so you may wish to upgrade to white, yellow, or rose gold in a few years)

    Resizing is super simple for a jeweler (but go to one that does repairs in-house and NOT a chain store!). Depending on how thin the shank is, they may recommend re-shanking (cutting off the thin portion and putting in a new piece of gold). This will be more expensive than just sizing up, but worth it because then it will last much longer. I don't know how pricy your area tends to be, but in mine such a repair would probably run in the $100-$200 range at most, unless the ring is super wide and heavy, which I assume it is not.
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  • My husband was in a similar situation. He inherited a simple gold band, that was pretty thin and needed to be resized...and also wasn't really his style. He had a jeweler set it into platinum, so it's a larger and more modern look. Perhaps you could look into the cost to have the ring set into sterling silver? (Only if he wants silver--there is no reason your rings have to match!).

    It's similar to this type of design. 

    Image result for mens gold in platinum ring
  • I'll state upfront that this is a controversial suggestion that violates strict etiquette:

    Can your FI ask his grandma for help with the resizing/restoration?  I would ONLY consider this if Grandma is financially comfortable, and ONLY if they have the sort of relationship where an ask like that would be acceptable.  Each family has its own relationship toward money.  I know that personally if my own grandma was still alive she would be crushed if a couple hundred dollars to get the ring resized prevented me from making use of an heirloom ring she gave me and I loved.  Maybe he could ask for this for Christmas?

    And it doesn't matter that the heirloom ring is a different color than yours. Plus, as someone already pointed out, silver doesn't really stand up to long term daily wear, so maybe you can replace yours with gold some day as well if you prefer that the rings match?
  • my rings are white gold hubby had a stainless steel ring or titanium it got to snug on him and couldn't be resized. he ended up picking out a new ring in gold at the jewelers. it does not match mine but who cares as long as he's happy it's all that matters 
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