When Your Hands Are Bigger Than Your FH's

marlajosephs · January 2017

Hello! First time posting here. So, amidst all the excitement of wedding planning, I've found myself insecure of a peculiar thing: the size of my hands.

I'm a girl, and my fiance is male. There certainly seems to be an expectation that women are supposed to have smaller ring sizes than men, but I have a ring size several sizes larger than him (I'm a 10.5-11, he's a 6.5--yes, he's on the petit side). I'm larger than him, in general--I'm about 4" taller than him and my feet are bigger than his.

He's reassured me that there's nothing wrong with any of that and that I'm beautiful, but after being turned away from all but one jewelry store in the mall because the rest just don't carry or adjust to my size... I've been finding myself more and more insecure over it.

So, two questions:

1) Do you deal with insecurity over ring size? If so, how do you deal with it?

2) What are the best jewelry stores that carry larger ring sizes for women? I still want a pretty and "feminine" ring, but most of the stores I've visited only carry rings up to size 8.

(Clarification on the last point-my FH and I have been dating for three years and in a "pre-engagement" for the last several months. This summer, we're going to make the engagement official; since we've already discussed the engagement, we're picking out the rings together).

OurWildKingdom · January 2017

Check out Etsy for larger size rings. FW and I both have a 9.5 ring size, and we found our engagement rings there. Only drawback is that we had to wait about six weeks, but that may just have been our seller.

levioosa · January 2017

Try going to an independent jeweler. They will be cheaper than the big chains like Kays, Zales, etc and have better quality gems. They will also be able to custom make whatever size ring you need and you can even create your own ring.

CMGragain · January 2017

marlajosephs said:

Hello! First time posting here. So, amidst all the excitement of wedding planning, I've found myself insecure of a peculiar thing: the size of my hands.

I'm a girl, and my fiance is male. There certainly seems to be an expectation that women are supposed to have smaller ring sizes than men, but I have a ring size several sizes larger than him (I'm a 10.5-11, he's a 6.5--yes, he's on the petit side). I'm larger than him, in general--I'm about 4" taller than him and my feet are bigger than his.

He's reassured me that there's nothing wrong with any of that and that I'm beautiful, but after being turned away from all but one jewelry store in the mall because the rest just don't carry or adjust to my size... I've been finding myself more and more insecure over it.

So, two questions:

1) Do you deal with insecurity over ring size? If so, how do you deal with it?

2) What are the best jewelry stores that carry larger ring sizes for women? I still want a pretty and "feminine" ring, but most of the stores I've visited only carry rings up to size 8.

(Clarification on the last point-my FH and I have been dating for three years and in a "pre-engagement" for the last several months. This summer, we're going to make the engagement official; since we've already discussed the engagement, we're picking out the rings together).

I told my 6' tall daughter not to worry about how tall a man is when choosing a life partner. This applies to ring size, too. Daughter married a shorter man, and he is wonderful to her and their two children.

Any good jeweler can size a ring up to the size you need. Do not go to a mall store for this. You need to choose a ring that has a plain shank in the back, not one that is engraved or has stones all around. My ring was originally a size 6, and it fit my hand perfectly! Forty years later, It is now a size 9. Same ring, No problems.

If you and your FI have agreed that you will be married and are shopping for rings, you are already engaged to be married. The engagement ring is only a symbol of that commitment. Many brides, including my mother and my sister, didn't even get one.

Congratulations!

MesmrEwe · January 2017

In general working with a local independent jeweler is the way to go! You help promote small business and the money stays in your community. To put your mind at ease, this is not something to worry about because like your shoe size, you really don't have much of any control over your hand size! I've had multiple "wedding rings" (no one tells you after kids your hand size may change...significantly!) and my husband's ring even if I wanted to I couldn't wedge on my ring finger. That said - my rings are purely feminine and I worked with my jeweler to select them. We ordered them in sized to my hand or had them resized by their people. You have an idea of how you want your ring to look and your budget, just work with your local jeweler and you'll have the ring(s) of your budget's dreams! The only mistake is likely working with larger chain jewelers who aren't as flexible. Are you going to be able to go into a jewelry store and try on different rings, not really, but you are going to get an idea of what you want (you already know this whether it's fully on your finger or not), so go ahead and order it!

karen818-2 · April 2017

I want to show you mine...it's a custom made ring from one of the local vendors in the city I live in with my fiance. You can also order a ring from anywhere and have it sized up. My ring is a size 9.5 and I've lost a bunch of weight recently so it now needs a snuggie thing on it to keep it from flying off (he used one of my middle finger rings to get the right size).

cindylover711 · November 2017

The ring looks really pretty. Totally fall in love with it.

MyNameIsNot · August 2020

knottie664d5a81b87f10df said:

agree, try to find independent jeweler

Please check the date before posting. There's no reason to reopen the thread just to duplicate something someone else said years ago.

When Your Hands Are Bigger Than Your FH's

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