Chit Chat

Decline to be sister's bridesmaid?

Hope you're all doing well out there. My youngest sister is getting married for the second time--- both are destination weddings. I was in her first wedding and now I have a feeling I'm going to be asked to be a bridesmaid. There have been a lot of weddings in my family in the past 5 years and I'm kinda over the bridesmaid dress and hoopla. Is it rude for me to decline? My other sister would probably jump at the chance to be a bridesmaid, so I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse. I can plan the bachelorette and help out with anything related to the wedding and helping to host her guests but I'm just not feeling this.... Am I being selfish and rude?

Re: Decline to be sister's bridesmaid?

  • I'm curious- besides the dress, what other "hoopla" are you expecting? Offering to help with the b-party and whatnot is often what bridesmaids do anyway. Was she kind of a 'zilla the first time around?
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  • You're good to decline.  I would just avoid giving any reason (prevents the "trying to fix it" drama) and keep repeating what @Charlotte989875 recommended above.
  • @thisismynickname She wasn't a 'zilla the first time but it was a huge wedding and I don't love getting announced at  the reception, standing in front of everyone at the ceremony and am feeling cheap about spending $300 on a dress I'll wear once. I think I'm just weddinged-out in general and feel like I'm too old for the pomp.  I am REALLY looking forward to a good friend's wedding in September, though, because it's a big three-day party on a beautiful lake and everyone's doing fun outdoorsy stuff and it'll be laid-back with a bunch of crazy people in a barn.  Both my sisters are traditional and formal so I don't always feel comfortable at their parties because I'm scared of inadvertently doing something wrong.
  • Thanks, ladies --- this makes me feel much better.  Apologies for the duplicate posts; my only excuse is that I was on my phone.  Enjoy your Thursday night :)


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