Budget Weddings Forum

Rehearsal Dinner Questions

Hello everyone! We are inviting 100 people to our wedding....90 of whom are from out of town. I have heard that you must invite out of town guests to the rehearsal dinner...but this seems insane. Is there any way I can shorten the list without being rude? Our wedding budget is pretty tight and I simply cannot afford to feed 90-100 people two nights in a row.

Please help! Thank you

Re: Rehearsal Dinner Questions

  • You don't have to invite all out of town guests to the rehearsal dinner. You can choose just to invite your bridal party, their significant others, and immediate family. 
  • missfrodo said:
    You don't have to invite all out of town guests to the rehearsal dinner. You can choose just to invite your bridal party, their significant others, and immediate family. 
    This.  Whoever told you all out of town guests must be invited to the rehearsal dinner was mistaken.  Only those who take part in the rehearsal, plus their SOs, must be invited to the rehearsal dinner.  If you're really strapped for cash, skip the rehearsal, and you don't need a dinner at all.  People can be told quickly before the ceremony where they need to go, so unless your ceremony is particularly complicated, it's not something you really need.  We didn't have one, and everything went fine (my parents did host a dinner for their visiting family the night before, but it's totally optional).  
    This.

    Only those involved in the rehearsal need to be invited to the dinner with their significant other. Couples usually also invite immediate family (parents, siblings, grandparents).

    Inviting OOT guests is a tradition, not a requirement. And it's a tradition from when there was less global travel- most people didn't live too far from where they grew up, thus there would be very few OOT guests.
  • Ditto advice on invite list. Anyone required at the rehearsal + their SOs and immediate family + SOs. 

    Also though, you don't even need to have a rehearsal dinner if you aren't having a rehearsal. And you really don't need a rehearsal unless it's a complicated ceremony. 
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  • That's mostly a regional tradition from what I understand.  We attended a wedding in Rhode Island and were not invited to the rehearsal dinner.  In fact, I would've been shocked and confused if we had been!  We only had a handful of out of town guests and we did not invite them to the rehearsal dinner.  It can be as big or small as you want.
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