Mixed Gender Ushers

Re: Mixed Gender Ushers

• CMGragain member

  

  March 2017

  Ushers are not a part of your wedding party.  They do not need to match you colors at all.  How old are the boys?  If they are at least 12, they should wear suits.  The girls should wear dresses.
  

  

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• greeninspring member

  

  March 2017

  I agree. Suits and a dress. The colors for the ushers don't matter as much. You can give them boutenierres and a corsage if you want them to stand out a little more. 

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• JediElizabeth member

  

  March 2017

  Knottie2a88b576acf48596 said:

  Hi there!  We are getting married in November and have asked my two nephews and niece to be ushers at our wedding.  The ceremony will be a Catholic Mass, and our church layout is a little different, so we are asking them to act really as greeters, more than seaters.  
  
  My questions is if anyone has seen a cute idea for dressing ushers that are mixed gender?  My bridesmaids will be wearing slate/steel blue, and the groomsmen possibly grey.  Our other colors are silver and red, which would be too loud for my niece to wear, but another dress might match the bridesmaids too much and confuse my older (read:etiquette crazy) guests.  Thoughts?

  There's a big difference between caring for etiquette and caring for whatever traditions your older guests hold dear. Etiquette is about not making others feel uncomfortable. Traditions often do the exact opposite. 
  
  Your guests experiences should not be changed by the attire of your ushers, wedding party, or even you. How they dress is traditional or not, depending on your choices. 
  
  Don't pay any attention to people who side eye that stuff. Instead, worry about things that changes guest experience for the better (not having a gap, making sure your guests are comfortable during the reception, etc.)

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• ahoywedding member

  

  March 2017

  I am a female and was an usher in my cousin's wedding. Her husband's male cousin was the other usher. I wore a black dress & he wore a suit and honestly I don't think anyone gave a damn what either of us looked like. We were present for the rehearsal, just so we understood the flow of the day, but it was a pretty minor thing. I think as long as we looked nice & presentable, it probably would have been fine.

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• southernbelle0915 mod

  

  March 2017

  Now that I have a kid, I can tell you that you'll be the parents' hero if you keep it simple/inexpensive and something they can wear again.
  
  I would ask them to put the girl in knee-length grey or silver dress and then you can give her a red corsage that matches the wedding party. I would ask them to put the boy in a black or grey suit with a white shirt and then you supply a slate blue tie and a boutonniere to match your niece's corsage. Both in black shoes.
  
  So basically you're asking the parents to buy a grey or silver dress that she can wear again and a black or grey suit that the boy can wear again. And by just saying something like "grey or silver knee-length dress with any black shoe" you're giving them the freedom to stay within their budget.

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• Knottie2a88b576acf48596 member

  

  March 2017

  Exactly the point: they're not part of the wedding party, so we wanted to not confuse people.
  
  Thanks for the positive and helpful comments!

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• ernursej member

  

  March 2017

  Knottie2a88b576acf48596 said:

  Exactly the point: they're not part of the wedding party, so we wanted to not confuse people.
  
  Thanks for the positive and helpful comments!

  
  I don't think people will get confused regardless of the dress. If someone is present at the beginning before people in similar looking dresses/suits start walking down the aisle, I will assume they are ushers. If people are walking down the aisle one after another to music and the guests are seated, I would assume they are part of the wedding party. Keep it simple and let them wear whatever they would like. A bout/corsage would be a lovely touch.

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