Wedding Party

Unhelpful Bridal Party

lkmkmlkmlkmkmlkm member
First Anniversary First Comment
edited July 2017 in Wedding Party
Got the advice I needed, thanks.

Re: Unhelpful Bridal Party

  • Ouch. My family lives across the country, we went to the courthouse to avoid the legal hassles of getting married outside the country & to save our anniversary date. We had planned the destination wedding first. 
  • ajflkdafs said:
    Ouch. My family lives across the country, we went to the courthouse to avoid the legal hassles of getting married outside the country & to save our anniversary date. We had planned the destination wedding first. 
     What does your family living cross country matter???  Are you making them go to Vegas, too?
  • ajflkdafs said:
    Ouch. My family lives across the country, we went to the courthouse to avoid the legal hassles of getting married outside the country & to save our anniversary date. We had planned the destination wedding first. 
    It doesn't matter why you chose to get married at the courthouse. You did choose to do that.  Congratulations!  You are married.

    Thousands of women have been married  just like you were. Cherish your wedding day. It was the day when you married the love of your life.

    Please don't subject your family and friends to this re-do, which won't be your wedding day.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • No...my family lives close to where our destination wedding is. I live close to Vegas. 
  • I'm not sure your need to put me down, you are right, they didn't offer to throw the party and I shouldn't expect their help. Everything else you've said has been completely rude. 
  • ajflkdafs said:
    No...my family lives close to where our destination wedding is. I live close to Vegas. 
    ajflkdafs said:
    No...my family lives close to where our destination wedding is. I live close to Vegas. 
    ajflkdafs said: 
    I'm not sure your need to put me down, you are right, they didn't offer to throw the party and I shouldn't expect their help. Everything else you've said has been completely rude. 
    I'm glad you realize that you don't expect their help.  Do they know that you're already married?
  • ajflkdafs said:
    I'm not sure your need to put me down, you are right, they didn't offer to throw the party and I shouldn't expect their help. Everything else you've said has been completely rude. 
    Not trying to be hurtful but the truth is not always easy to take. 
  • ajflkdafs said:
    I'm not sure your need to put me down, you are right, they didn't offer to throw the party and I shouldn't expect their help. Everything else you've said has been completely rude. 
    Nothing said was rude. Honest? yes. Blunt? yes. But not rude. 
    image
  • Calling MUD. 
    One post ever? Check.
    PPD? Check. 
    DW? Check.
    Expensive Bach? Check.
    Complaining about lack of participation from "bride"slaves? Check. 
    *********************************************************************************

    image
  • MobKaz said:
    ajflkdafs said:
    Ouch. My family lives across the country, we went to the courthouse to avoid the legal hassles of getting married outside the country & to save our anniversary date. We had planned the destination wedding first. 
    From whom?  From what?  Date abductors?

    See this is part of the cognitive dissonance I never get. She knows it's her husband, she considers the courthouse wedding her anniversary - how is that not fully real? And if the courthouse wedding is the real thing, why would people care about the destination re-do? Or have interest in a "bachelorette"?

    I guess it's just thinking you're entitled to everything you've ever seen people receive around their marriage - you're obviously going to have a fancy bachelorette, and people will love to do it and make it work because you and because marriage happens/ed somewhere in there, so what does it matter if it's after the actual marriage?
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited July 2017
    Ha! Ha!  Now she tried to delete her original post!  Her wedding was LAST YEAR, and now she wants a PPD????  Complete with destination bachelorette party and bridesmaids???
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Calling MUD. 
    One post ever? Check.
    PPD? Check. 
    DW? Check.
    Expensive Bach? Check.
    Complaining about lack of participation from "bride"slaves? Check. 
    I was just going to post this. 
  • MobKaz said:
    ajflkdafs said:
    Ouch. My family lives across the country, we went to the courthouse to avoid the legal hassles of getting married outside the country & to save our anniversary date. We had planned the destination wedding first. 
    From whom?  From what?  Date abductors?

    See this is part of the cognitive dissonance I never get. She knows it's her husband, she considers the courthouse wedding her anniversary - how is that not fully real? And if the courthouse wedding is the real thing, why would people care about the destination re-do? Or have interest in a "bachelorette"?

    I guess it's just thinking you're entitled to everything you've ever seen people receive around their marriage - you're obviously going to have a fancy bachelorette, and people will love to do it and make it work because you and because marriage happens/ed somewhere in there, so what does it matter if it's after the actual marriage?
    The part I never get is this date obsession.  It's the tail wagging the dog- getting married on a specific date so that the date will hold significance.

    Um, the date you get married is significant because it's the day you got married.  Not because it's June 25th ><

    Are there women who induce labor so their child has the specific birthday they wanted?

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • I agree ... if a date is important for a reason, celebrate it for that very reason!  My husband & I "celebrate" 3 dates - our first date, the day he proposed, and our wedding day.  When I say "celebrate", for the first two, we'll be like "awwwww, 5 years ago today I was so nervous!" or he may get a flower.  

    Regarding induction, I have a friend was induced on 11/11/11.  She was induced for medical reasons (high blood pressure, I think).  But we all tease her that she just wanted the cool birth date for her daughter.
  • I kind of understand wanting a specific date, that's why my husband and I waited ~1 year after getting engaged to get married (at City Hall! gasp! and we didn't do a second pretend dress up party afterwards! were we even married?) but we just cleared the date with our guests (immediate family and my bff). But it's the wanting a date and then deciding it wasn't enough and you need even more celebrations about you that I just can't accept.

    You make choices when it comes to weddings, choosing a date over a big celebration is a choice. And you have to live with the consequences, some of which are not then throwing yourself multiple parties in your honor that don't apply to you. I didn't have a shower or bachelorette because a) no one offered and b) I wouldn't have accepted because we didn't have guests besides the above at our wedding.

    It's unbelievable how selfish some people can get, OP included. You are not owed all these parties just because you are getting (or in her case, got) married.
  • I can understand wanting to AVOID certain dates - like Christmas or 9/11 or the date of a family tragedy. And I can understand wanting to have a baby in a certain season because whatever reasons, whether preference/job specific/weather/etc.

    But I can't understand trying to schedule an unnecessary c-section or a medically unnecessary induction because cool date. Just no.
    *********************************************************************************

    image
  • MobKaz said:
    ajflkdafs said:
    Ouch. My family lives across the country, we went to the courthouse to avoid the legal hassles of getting married outside the country & to save our anniversary date. We had planned the destination wedding first. 
    From whom?  From what?  Date abductors?

    See this is part of the cognitive dissonance I never get. She knows it's her husband, she considers the courthouse wedding her anniversary - how is that not fully real? And if the courthouse wedding is the real thing, why would people care about the destination re-do? Or have interest in a "bachelorette"?

    I guess it's just thinking you're entitled to everything you've ever seen people receive around their marriage - you're obviously going to have a fancy bachelorette, and people will love to do it and make it work because you and because marriage happens/ed somewhere in there, so what does it matter if it's after the actual marriage?
    The part I never get is this date obsession.  It's the tail wagging the dog- getting married on a specific date so that the date will hold significance.

    Um, the date you get married is significant because it's the day you got married.  Not because it's June 25th ><

    Are there women who induce labor so their child has the specific birthday they wanted?
    I don't know how true this was, but I seem to remember stories at the end of 1999 of pregnant women trying to time their C-section...or push the birth through natural means...so their baby was born on Jan. 1, 2000.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • MobKaz said:
    ajflkdafs said:
    Ouch. My family lives across the country, we went to the courthouse to avoid the legal hassles of getting married outside the country & to save our anniversary date. We had planned the destination wedding first. 
    From whom?  From what?  Date abductors?

    See this is part of the cognitive dissonance I never get. She knows it's her husband, she considers the courthouse wedding her anniversary - how is that not fully real? And if the courthouse wedding is the real thing, why would people care about the destination re-do? Or have interest in a "bachelorette"?

    I guess it's just thinking you're entitled to everything you've ever seen people receive around their marriage - you're obviously going to have a fancy bachelorette, and people will love to do it and make it work because you and because marriage happens/ed somewhere in there, so what does it matter if it's after the actual marriage?
    The part I never get is this date obsession.  It's the tail wagging the dog- getting married on a specific date so that the date will hold significance.

    Um, the date you get married is significant because it's the day you got married.  Not because it's June 25th ><

    Are there women who induce labor so their child has the specific birthday they wanted?
    Yes. My niece was born on 11/12, and was a scheduled (medically necessary) c-section. I remember that the doctor originally looked at the day before because it was her regular Tuesday at the hospital or whatever, but the hospital was booked solid with planned c-sections for 11/11. 

    People are nuts. It's just a freaking number. 
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