Jane,
My sister and I grew up middle class. Fine.
My sister married well, and is now upper middle class. Also fine.
Through immaturity, bad luck, and 2008 I ended up working poor for nearly ten years. When I was broke my sister went out of her way to help: $20 here, dinner there. I was, and am grateful. I knew then I’d bounce back, and I did. I am now nearly middle-class and have not forgotten her kindness. Also fine.
Working poverty taught me humility, and I observe hubris in my sister. While I have no problem with her being upper middle class, I do realize she is proud, and used to deference. Working poverty, which she seems unwilling to consider might happen to her, creates very little pride or deference.
I know that life is capricious and that one’s station in life can depend on many variables, including many outside our control. She could end up broke, in other words. But she seems uniquely unwilling or unable to consider this. Simply put, she’s getting snotty, and acting better than her siblings.
Is this worth confronting her about?
I will abide by whatever you say.