Hi all! I know there are always questions on wedding dress code but I'm just trying to figure out the best way to communicate it. Long story short the venue we are having our wedding at (private social club) has a fairly open dress code but bars guest from wearing jeans, tshirts, and sneakers. If we as hosts of our event were to not specify a dress code to our guests and had a good deal showing up in jeans, we would run the risk of losing our deposit for failing to comply with the contract.
Our wedding isn't for a year so when we booked the venue several months ago we let our close family know that the dress code would be pretty formal and asked that they gently spread the word when the time comes. I'm concerned about the way my FMIL is conveying the dress code to our upcoming guests (though she shouldn't be having the conversation with anyone yet as save the dates haven't even gone out, but that's another issue). Apparently she is flat out telling extended family members that if they wear jeans we will lose our deposit. There are a lot of issues here, I'm aware, but I'm not sure how to kindly communicate that there is a better way to send this message.