Music

Father/ Daughter Dance for deceased father

I have been going back and forth whether or not to have a father/daughter dance. I lost my dad 7 years ago from a car accident. I did not want to skip because I believe it would be harder knowing that I did not get my dance with him. I decided to start dancing with my mother and then my step dad as they are walking me down the aisle, and then having the DJ annouce anyone that would like to honor my dad to come join and dance with me. I am now stuck on trying to find a good song. I do not want to do a song that would be sad as it will already be an emotional moment, I want to keep it uplifting and in a honor of my dad. Anyone have good suggestions for songs to honor a father?

Re: Father/ Daughter Dance for deceased father

  • I think this might....be a little...insensitive? I don't know the exact words, but it doesn't sound right. Could you maybe play one of your father's favorite songs instead? Do you have someone who kind of stepped into the "father" role after he passed? Usually subtle details or nods to family who have passed are better than the kind of blatant statements. What would you do if no one came forward to "honor" your dad? 

    I was at a wedding several years ago and the groom's father was deceased. They brought the urn of his ashes to the wedding and the groom & his mom danced with the urn during the mother/son dance. As someone who wasn't part of the family and didn't know his father, it was very uncomfortable.
  • @ahoywedding ; I get what you mean.


    I was in your position. It was hard in different aspects for our wedding because my dad wanted to be a huge part of it.
    My dad passed suddenly in spring 2014, and we got married in summer 2015


    I am going to suggest against your idea.
    Before you question it, hear me out. You have to plan something. Bring up those memories that you may not realize are hurting you. Weddings are stressful and emotional.

    Do something else. Definitely still dance with your mum and stepdad if you want.
    I opted to use a piece of my dad's shirt and had it cut into a heart and sewn into my dress.
    Since there was close family - both grandfathers on my side, my husband's grandfather - that also passed away, we put their photos by the guestbook.
    I also lost a friend, but since we had a slideshow I just ensured her photo was there.

    Depending on the song, you could request the DJ to play something and not mention anything. It'll be a personal memorial that you and a few close people will know about.
    ahoyweddingJen4948
  • I think you may choose a song that your dad deeply in love with in the past days. [Hugs]
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston
    10000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    member
    edited November 7
    I think there are appropriate ways to honor your father's memory at your wedding, but this kind of thing should be avoided.

    Your wedding is supposed to be a happy occasion. Any "memorial" to your father or any other deceased loved one needs to be subtle so as not to evoke grief and loss. This type of "memorial" has all the subtlety of an oncoming Mack truck. People will want to dance to celebrate a happy occasion with you -- not as a "memorial" gesture.
    CMGragainMissKittyDanger
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