Dear Jane,
My boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 or 7 months. Minus the usual ups and downs, things are pretty good. However, he is a truly horrible texter. I would say the average time he takes to respond to any given text message is 1 1/2 to 2 hours. Frequently he doesn’t reply at all. He doesn’t have a smart phone, so he’s not attached to his phone in the way many of us are, so that could definitely the cause of the problem. Or maybe, like many of us who even do have smart phones, he’s just bad at checking his phone.
Either way, I’m beginning to find it pretty intolerable. I don’t overly enjoy small talk over text, so I’m fine with not constantly being in touch. But there’s just something that really bothers me about someone starting a conversation only to sporadically engage in it or not follow up at all. For example, he’ll ask me how my day was, I’ll respond relatively promptly and ask how his was, then he’ll respond hours later or not at all. I should also mention that his unreliability over text makes it very difficult to make plans when talking on the phone isn’t feasible. Basically it all boils down this: I’d rather just not hear from him at all on any given day than only hear from him over text.
Here are my questions: am I right to find this annoying? Should I just ask him to only communicate via phone call? I’m not really interested in trying to get him to respond more promptly, as that seems unlikely.
Thanks Jane!
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