An hour. For. A. Bath.

ei34 · April 2018

I think Hannah’s mom was the most wrong for what she said to LW, followed by Hannah for bringing four guests into the home and not preparing them for the norm. Back in my post-college roommate days, the three of us decided the guest policy was we could host one guest at a time (as opposed to Hannah’s four) and that the guest had to be out id hosting roommate was out. I find it obnoxious that so many of Hannah’s family members were just hanging out pounding on the door like they owned the place.

As someone who lives in a one bathroom home with three toddler/preschoolers in various stages of potty-training, I can’t imagine doing anything in the BA for an hour. But, LW isn’t me. She can go ahead and take that 6-7pm bath, as long as she’s checked with Hannah.

ShesSoCold · April 2018

eileenrob said:

I think Hannah’s mom was the most wrong for what she said to LW, followed by Hannah for bringing four guests into the home and not preparing them for the norm. Back in my post-college roommate days, the three of us decided the guest policy was we could host one guest at a time (as opposed to Hannah’s four) and that the guest had to be out id hosting roommate was out. I find it obnoxious that so many of Hannah’s family members were just hanging out pounding on the door like they owned the place.

As someone who lives in a one bathroom home with three toddler/preschoolers in various stages of potty-training, I can’t imagine doing anything in the BA for an hour. But, LW isn’t me. She can go ahead and take that 6-7pm bath, as long as she’s checked with Hannah.

Yeah that's a good point. I grew up with 5 people in one bathroom (we did have one of those old basement toilets for emergencies) so nobody did anything in the bathroom that wasn't totally necessary (when H and I were dating and moved into our first apartment, he looked at me like I was nuts when I was blow drying my hair in the bedroom. My mind was blown when it occurred to me that one could dry their hair IN the bathroom!). So my opinion might have been swayed by that too.

But I still think that LW, just this once, could have cut her bath short after the first knock.

But you bet your ass that after that second knock and all the shit talking, I would have stayed in that bath until I couldn't possibly stand it anymore.

hunnybeart · April 2018

As long as the people paying the rent to occupy the space don't have a problem with the arrangement I don't see the problem. For all we know Hannah could work odd hours like 2nd shift and is never home at 6pm anyway so it works for them. The problem is when you introduce 4 extra people, so now 6 people have to share a bathroom. Hannah and her should have definitely talked before this but maybe they did and neither one of them thought to bring it up. Personally 4 extra people is too much to be staying in a shared house, they should have gotten a hotel room or when this incident happened been like, yeah this isn't going to work let's go get a hotel room and stay there the rest of our visit to avoid any problems.

ei34 · April 2018

ShesSoCold said:

eileenrob said:

I think Hannah’s mom was the most wrong for what she said to LW, followed by Hannah for bringing four guests into the home and not preparing them for the norm. Back in my post-college roommate days, the three of us decided the guest policy was we could host one guest at a time (as opposed to Hannah’s four) and that the guest had to be out id hosting roommate was out. I find it obnoxious that so many of Hannah’s family members were just hanging out pounding on the door like they owned the place.

As someone who lives in a one bathroom home with three toddler/preschoolers in various stages of potty-training, I can’t imagine doing anything in the BA for an hour. But, LW isn’t me. She can go ahead and take that 6-7pm bath, as long as she’s checked with Hannah.

Yeah that's a good point. I grew up with 5 people in one bathroom (we did have one of those old basement toilets for emergencies) so nobody did anything in the bathroom that wasn't totally necessary (when H and I were dating and moved into our first apartment, he looked at me like I was nuts when I was blow drying my hair in the bedroom. My mind was blown when it occurred to me that one could dry their hair IN the bathroom!). So my opinion might have been swayed by that too.
But I still think that LW, just this once, could have cut her bath short after the first knock.
But you bet your ass that after that second knock and all the shit talking, I would have stayed in that bath until I couldn't possibly stand it anymore.

Lol...I grew up six people with one bath and H grew up sharing a bath with two sisters (and depending on the weekend also two step-sisters). A few days into living together we were going out somewhere, he was shaving at the kitchen sink and I was blowing out my hair in the bedroom. We kind of joked that one of us could’ve used the bathroom.

MissKittyDanger · April 2018

ShesSoCold said:

eileenrob said:

I think Hannah’s mom was the most wrong for what she said to LW, followed by Hannah for bringing four guests into the home and not preparing them for the norm. Back in my post-college roommate days, the three of us decided the guest policy was we could host one guest at a time (as opposed to Hannah’s four) and that the guest had to be out id hosting roommate was out. I find it obnoxious that so many of Hannah’s family members were just hanging out pounding on the door like they owned the place.

As someone who lives in a one bathroom home with three toddler/preschoolers in various stages of potty-training, I can’t imagine doing anything in the BA for an hour. But, LW isn’t me. She can go ahead and take that 6-7pm bath, as long as she’s checked with Hannah.

Yeah that's a good point. I grew up with 5 people in one bathroom (we did have one of those old basement toilets for emergencies) so nobody did anything in the bathroom that wasn't totally necessary (when H and I were dating and moved into our first apartment, he looked at me like I was nuts when I was blow drying my hair in the bedroom. My mind was blown when it occurred to me that one could dry their hair IN the bathroom!). So my opinion might have been swayed by that too.
But I still think that LW, just this once, could have cut her bath short after the first knock.
But you bet your ass that after that second knock and all the shit talking, I would have stayed in that bath until I couldn't possibly stand it anymore.

"the water is cold and I am pruned but this is a protest!"

ShesSoCold · April 2018

eileenrob said:

Lol...I grew up six people with one bath and H grew up sharing a bath with two sisters (and depending on the weekend also two step-sisters). A few days into living together we were going out somewhere, he was shaving at the kitchen sink and I was blowing out my hair in the bedroom. We kind of joked that one of us could’ve used the bathroom.

LMAO yes, it was life changing! H grew up as an only child in a house with like 4 bathrooms so he had no idea what it was like having a designated morning or evening time slot. Doing my makeup and hair in the bathroom felt "wrong" for like 2 years.

banana468 · April 2018

eileenrob said:

I think Hannah’s mom was the most wrong for what she said to LW, followed by Hannah for bringing four guests into the home and not preparing them for the norm. Back in my post-college roommate days, the three of us decided the guest policy was we could host one guest at a time (as opposed to Hannah’s four) and that the guest had to be out id hosting roommate was out. I find it obnoxious that so many of Hannah’s family members were just hanging out pounding on the door like they owned the place.

As someone who lives in a one bathroom home with three toddler/preschoolers in various stages of potty-training, I can’t imagine doing anything in the BA for an hour. But, LW isn’t me. She can go ahead and take that 6-7pm bath, as long as she’s checked with Hannah.

I've told DH that I've had naps shorter than his time in a bathroom. I just can't be in there that long and still consider it peaceful because there will be screaming, items thrown under the door and pounding on the door. Not to mention after a few minutes in a bath the water starts to get COLD.

artbyallie · April 2018

Maybe my viewpoint is skewed because I can't take baths. Even now, if I do, I will inevitably get a UTI.

But what in the hell is so great about a bath after maybe 30 minutes max anyway? Isn't the water freezing after an hour? And if you're draining cold to add hot, you're wasting an awful lot of it.

banana468 · April 2018

artbyallie said:

Maybe my viewpoint is skewed because I can't take baths. Even now, if I do, I will inevitably get a UTI. But what in the hell is so great about a bath after maybe 30 minutes max anyway? Isn't the water freezing after an hour? And if you're draining cold to add hot, you're wasting an awful lot of it.

Exactly.

In all of this, the LW was able to have a bath - just not the HOUR LONG bath.

It baffles me. People need to get into the bathroom. If you're in it, you finish what you're doing and get out.

Not getting out because your hour isn't up yet just makes me wonder how someone functions. You are bathed. Get out.

VarunaTT · April 2018

banana468 said:

artbyallie said:

Maybe my viewpoint is skewed because I can't take baths. Even now, if I do, I will inevitably get a UTI. But what in the hell is so great about a bath after maybe 30 minutes max anyway? Isn't the water freezing after an hour? And if you're draining cold to add hot, you're wasting an awful lot of it.

Exactly.

In all of this, the LW was able to have a bath - just not the HOUR LONG bath.

It baffles me. People need to get into the bathroom. If you're in it, you finish what you're doing and get out.

Not getting out because your hour isn't up yet just makes me wonder how someone functions. You are bathed. Get out.

I'm usually not in a bath to bathe. That's what showers are for. I'm in the bath to relax. Being in/near water relaxes me (bath, pool, rivers, creeks, streams, just not the ocean, NOPE). Like I said earlier, it's my self care. I usually take a book, have some bubbles, I've had my laptop to watch a show or I've just sat in there with my eyes clothes, enjoying the heat and relaxing. I usually don't do anything except wash my face in there. I suspect LW is the same.

As for the water, it does cool but I have it so hot to begin with, it's usually fine. And yep, I drain some and add new (it's not a whole new bath ful of water). Other people have their forms of self-care, this one is mine.

short+sassy · April 2018

artbyallie said:

Maybe my viewpoint is skewed because I can't take baths. Even now, if I do, I will inevitably get a UTI. But what in the hell is so great about a bath after maybe 30 minutes max anyway? Isn't the water freezing after an hour? And if you're draining cold to add hot, you're wasting an awful lot of it.

Yes and I do, lol. Though certainly not every day or even that often.

But, every once in awhile, I'll put a glass of wine in a plastic cup. Grab a good book. And get my bubble bath fix on! I find it relaxing and refreshing.

My H actually takes more luxuriating baths than I do! Though he tends to be more on the 20-30 minute side and will get out when the water gets cold, instead of refilling.

There was one August a few years ago when a tropical storm had knocked out our power for a week. 95+ degrees and thick humidity all day. My H and I were switching off taking a couple 1+ hour baths a day with cold water. It was the best way to stay cool. Over time, the water actually would go from being cold to slightly above room temp. That was a really bad week, lol.

banana468 · April 2018

VarunaTT said:

banana468 said:

artbyallie said:

Maybe my viewpoint is skewed because I can't take baths. Even now, if I do, I will inevitably get a UTI. But what in the hell is so great about a bath after maybe 30 minutes max anyway? Isn't the water freezing after an hour? And if you're draining cold to add hot, you're wasting an awful lot of it.

Exactly.

In all of this, the LW was able to have a bath - just not the HOUR LONG bath.

It baffles me. People need to get into the bathroom. If you're in it, you finish what you're doing and get out.

Not getting out because your hour isn't up yet just makes me wonder how someone functions. You are bathed. Get out.

I'm usually not in a bath to bathe. That's what showers are for. I'm in the bath to relax. Being in/near water relaxes me (bath, pool, rivers, creeks, streams, just not the ocean, NOPE). Like I said earlier, it's my self care. I usually take a book, have some bubbles, I've had my laptop to watch a show or I've just sat in there with my eyes clothes, enjoying the heat and relaxing. I usually don't do anything except wash my face in there. I suspect LW is the same.

As for the water, it does cool but I have it so hot to begin with, it's usually fine. And yep, I drain some and add new (it's not a whole new bath ful of water). Other people have their forms of self-care, this one is mine.

I get that.

But in all of your posts @VarunaTT I just get the overall impression that you are considerate of others in your daily actions. So if you were about to close yourself in on the only bathroom for an hour those who would need to use it would be aware.

If the LW said, "I told everyone who may not have known that I'm going in for my evening bath and would need an hour in the room so please go in now. They didn't take me up at that time and then banged on the door when I was less than halfway through!" I'd have far more sympathy.

There seem to be nuances of understanding human behavior that are missing here from the LW.

And I just wonder if this is the roommate's first dip into a shared living arrangement that doesn't involve flip flops in the shower which is why mom is being so rude. It doesn't make it right- but I just get the impression that mom is there to approve the arrangement and make judgments as her daughter grows up.

STARMOON44 · April 2018

banana468 said:

VarunaTT said:

banana468 said:

artbyallie said:

Maybe my viewpoint is skewed because I can't take baths. Even now, if I do, I will inevitably get a UTI. But what in the hell is so great about a bath after maybe 30 minutes max anyway? Isn't the water freezing after an hour? And if you're draining cold to add hot, you're wasting an awful lot of it.

Exactly.

In all of this, the LW was able to have a bath - just not the HOUR LONG bath.

It baffles me. People need to get into the bathroom. If you're in it, you finish what you're doing and get out.

Not getting out because your hour isn't up yet just makes me wonder how someone functions. You are bathed. Get out.

I'm usually not in a bath to bathe. That's what showers are for. I'm in the bath to relax. Being in/near water relaxes me (bath, pool, rivers, creeks, streams, just not the ocean, NOPE). Like I said earlier, it's my self care. I usually take a book, have some bubbles, I've had my laptop to watch a show or I've just sat in there with my eyes clothes, enjoying the heat and relaxing. I usually don't do anything except wash my face in there. I suspect LW is the same.

As for the water, it does cool but I have it so hot to begin with, it's usually fine. And yep, I drain some and add new (it's not a whole new bath ful of water). Other people have their forms of self-care, this one is mine.

I get that.

But in all of your posts @VarunaTT I just get the overall impression that you are considerate of others in your daily actions. So if you were about to close yourself in on the only bathroom for an hour those who would need to use it would be aware.

If the LW said, "I told everyone who may not have known that I'm going in for my evening bath and would need an hour in the room so please go in now. They didn't take me up at that time and then banged on the door when I was less than halfway through!" I'd have far more sympathy.

There seem to be nuances of understanding human behavior that are missing here from the LW.

And I just wonder if this is the roommate's first dip into a shared living arrangement that doesn't involve flip flops in the shower which is why mom is being so rude. It doesn't make it right- but I just get the impression that mom is there to approve the arrangement and make judgments as her daughter grows up.

Yeah I completely get the appeal of a hour long bath. But I’m the moment when other people need the bathroom, you wrap things up and then have a discussion about what happens next time with your roommate. Just staying in there? Rude.

VarunaTT · April 2018

And like I've stated before, I think LW made a mistake for the 2nd person and how they weren't pre-emptive or responsive. And, TBH, I feel like there might be another level to LW's issue, b/c that's awfully rigid for a routine.

But I don't think LW's mistake is as big as the guests bad behavior, or really, Hannah's failure in being considerate of her roomate's habits.

mrsconn23 · April 2018

VarunaTT said:

And like I've stated before, I think LW made a mistake for the 2nd person and how they weren't pre-emptive or responsive. And, TBH, I feel like there might be another level to LW's issue, b/c that's awfully rigid for a routine.

But I don't think LW's mistake is as big as the guests bad behavior, or really, Hannah's failure in being considerate of her roomate's habits.

Agreed. I have a Sheldon Cooper-esque vision of LW in my head.

banana468 · April 2018

mrsconn23 said:

VarunaTT said:

And like I've stated before, I think LW made a mistake for the 2nd person and how they weren't pre-emptive or responsive. And, TBH, I feel like there might be another level to LW's issue, b/c that's awfully rigid for a routine.

But I don't think LW's mistake is as big as the guests bad behavior, or really, Hannah's failure in being considerate of her roomate's habits.

Agreed. I have a Sheldon Cooper-esque vision of LW in my head.

"What time do you move your bowels every day?"

lovesclimbing · April 2018

mrsconn23 said:

VarunaTT said:

And like I've stated before, I think LW made a mistake for the 2nd person and how they weren't pre-emptive or responsive. And, TBH, I feel like there might be another level to LW's issue, b/c that's awfully rigid for a routine.

But I don't think LW's mistake is as big as the guests bad behavior, or really, Hannah's failure in being considerate of her roomate's habits.

Agreed. I have a Sheldon Cooper-esque vision of LW in my head.

Haha, I was going to say this, but then I remember him saying to Penny in an early episode that he used the bathroom from x time to y time and that she should "plan her ablutions accordingly," so he actually informed them of his routine so they could plan around it. It doesn't sound like the LW did so, which would have been considerate.

MesmrEwe · April 2018

Long tub soaker here... SNS - it's self-care, and one of the few chances for me to get an undisturbed nap in (yes - I SLEEP in the tub!). I also use it to massage with heat muscles with the shower water..

Hannah should be told - js - because she brought extra house guests in who thought they had hotel access to the restroom instead of going over the house routine with her guests, she expected her roommates to play hosts too. That many extra people SNS - Motel 6 is $50-60/night, but more than that, LW has a routine (who's to say that hour is directly before she heads into work). Presumably she uses that time slot because she isn't bothered or rushed and where it is a very set routine, Hannah should have notified her guests as much as the hostess. It is not the roommate's job to attend to Hannah's guests whims. It's one thing if that was the only bathroom in the entire house and they'd have zero access for going potty, but that's not the case. I also presume there was snarky comments only instead of any questions about time. Even if it was the case, Hannah needs a "Logistics 101 - this is why guests get a hotel when you have a house-full of roommates or you inform them of your house quirks"...

IMO - In the idealistic world - SNS, I'd have confronted the rudeness through the door while I was in the shower/tub. She lives there, it is "her" house too, not the guests whom she had no control over the invitation there-of, and a snarky "Hannah should have informed you this is MY TIME!" every night. Flip the story to any of the cast of characters and LW should be standing up for herself IRL.

climbingsingle · April 2018

I also don't get the concept of taking an hour long bath.

If you choose to rent a bedroom and have a shared space like a bathroom, sometimes that will mean your schedule will get disrupted if your housemate has guests, and you should be accommodating of that. I can't imagine sitting in the bath for another 40 minutes after knowing that your housemate's sister was looking to use the bathroom. Why not be considerate and cut your bath short?

But also, I think it's a little nuts to have 4 of your relatives come stay with you when you share just 1 bathroom.

kimmiinthemitten · April 2018

climbingwife said:

I also don't get the concept of taking an hour long bath.

If you choose to rent a bedroom and have a shared space like a bathroom, sometimes that will mean your schedule will get disrupted if your housemate has guests, and you should be accommodating of that. I can't imagine sitting in the bath for another 40 minutes after knowing that your housemate's sister was looking to use the bathroom. Why not be considerate and cut your bath short?

But also, I think it's a little nuts to have 4 of your relatives come stay with you when you share just 1 bathroom.

I can't figure out if I'm more shocked a Prudie about a bath filled two pages or that it took two pages for someone to finally mention this. Get a hotel mom and sisters! That's nuts!

banana468 · April 2018

kimmiinthemitten said:

climbingwife said:

I also don't get the concept of taking an hour long bath.

If you choose to rent a bedroom and have a shared space like a bathroom, sometimes that will mean your schedule will get disrupted if your housemate has guests, and you should be accommodating of that. I can't imagine sitting in the bath for another 40 minutes after knowing that your housemate's sister was looking to use the bathroom. Why not be considerate and cut your bath short?

But also, I think it's a little nuts to have 4 of your relatives come stay with you when you share just 1 bathroom.

I can't figure out if I'm more shocked a Prudie about a bath filled two pages or that it took two pages for someone to finally mention this. Get a hotel mom and sisters! That's nuts!

FWIW I think it's nuts. In my head the arrangement is two girls living with a couple, Hannah's told her mom that the LW is this really rigid person and they share a bathroom, it's their first time living in a new place - maybe even in the "big city". Mom and Dad and the siblings are now needing to come out and visit. They want to check on their "baby" and make sure that she's doing well.

So they're not staying with them instead of a hotel. They're also the kind of parents who are helicoptering over their daughter to make sure that SHE is making good choices as tip toes into adulthood.

Maybe as Hannah ages she'll be able to say more to her mom and dad but Hannah right now still has a feeling of debt to her parents and simply cannot say no to her mom who rules the roost. And mom thinks that this living arrangement should be up to HER standards and not necessarily the arrangement that has been mutually agreed to by those who are actually living there.

Clearly none of that is written by the LW but it's what I've concocted in my head.

ei34 · April 2018

The funny thing about Hannah’s family is if even if they’d sprung for a hotel room it most likely would’ve been the four of them in one room with one bathroom. Would Hannah’s mom have criticized her daughters’ upbringing if they fought over the bathroom?

thisismynickname2 · April 2018

Hm, I don't think 4 houseguests is too odd. As long as I've been alive we've been visiting family overseas and we've almost always stayed with relatives. I've definitely experienced a week of 4 house-guests in little European homes with one tiny bathroom.

You. Take. Turns. This whole letter would have been alleviated with advance planning, the mom is an ass for talking shit and the LW is an ass for not being considerate and for being overly rigid once it was apparent others needed time in there too. Be nice ONE time and figure out the schedule for the remaining days so she can still have her self-care time.

mrsconn23 · April 2018

thisismynickname2 said:

You. Take. Turns. This whole letter would have been alleviated with advance planning, the mom is an ass for talking shit and the LW is an ass for not being considerate and for being overly rigid once it was apparent others needed time in there too. Be nice ONE time and figure out the schedule for the remaining days so she can still have her self-care time.

I agree. Mom was the biggest asshole for being insulting, but everyone in this situation was a little bit of an asshole. Sisters for talking shit, Hannah for not managing her family's and LW's expectations, and LW for continuing their rigid routine and being non-responsive to guests in her home (yes, they weren't LW's guests...but since it was already a done deal they were staying, a little give goes a long way and then she and Hannah need to talk it out after the fact...hindsight and all that). Nothing LW did warranted being insulted the way they were, but they are not 100% a victim in the frustrated reaction they received.

I shared a bathroom and when we were teenagers, a phone, with 2 sisters. And we had family/friends stay with us when they were in town from time to time. Plus traveling as an adult, I've spent plenty of time in family homes or shared space in a condo or vacation home. Therefore it is unfathomable to me to not communicate some sort of 'plan' when several people are sharing a space, regarding many aspects (cooking, sleeping, outings, etc), but especially when there's numerous people and just a couple bathrooms.

levioosa · April 2018

Am I the only one who thinks there might be some sort of mental health issue going on? Like, I get all of the points brought up so far, but LW takes an HOUR LONG bath EXACTLY at 6 pm EVERYDAY? What happens if she had moved that to 7pm? Or if she had taken it earlier? Or, just for kicks and giggles, let's say that instead of having houseguests, Hannah was having a birthday or graduation party. It sounds like this is the only available bathroom that is not in the master. Would that change things for the people defending LW's bathroom rights? If there's only one bathroom to use in a shared space, it stands to reason that sometimes your routine is going to be interrupted. The houseguests were also rude, but I just can't get over LW being that solid in her routine that she's not able to make an exception.

I also wonder about the first "pounding" on the door. Like was it really as rude as portrayed or was it a "Hey LW, I was wondering how long you'd be as we're trying to get ready for dinner soon?" And then 20 minutes later, aka 40 minutes into the bath, "Hey LW, we actually have reservations at x time and I have to use the restroom. Will you be out soon?" And if LW stayed in the bath after that I'd be pretty ticked as a guest too. LW is coming off a liiiittlleee bit like a martyr to me. She locked herself in her bedroom the rest of the weekend and wouldn't come out? Okay.

VarunaTT · April 2018

levioosa said:

Am I the only one who thinks there might be some sort of mental health issue going on? Like, I get all of the points brought up so far, but LW takes an HOUR LONG bath EXACTLY at 6 pm EVERYDAY? What happens if she had moved that to 7pm? Or if she had taken it earlier? Or, just for kicks and giggles, let's say that instead of having houseguests, Hannah was having a birthday or graduation party. It sounds like this is the only available bathroom that is not in the master. Would that change things for the people defending LW's bathroom rights? If there's only one bathroom to use in a shared space, it stands to reason that sometimes your routine is going to be interrupted. The houseguests were also rude, but I just can't get over LW being that solid in her routine that she's not able to make an exception.

I also wonder about the first "pounding" on the door. Like was it really as rude as portrayed or was it a "Hey LW, I was wondering how long you'd be as we're trying to get ready for dinner soon?" And then 20 minutes later, aka 40 minutes into the bath, "Hey LW, we actually have reservations at x time and I have to use the restroom. Will you be out soon?" And if LW stayed in the bath after that I'd be pretty ticked as a guest too. LW is coming off a liiiittlleee bit like a martyr to me. She locked herself in her bedroom the rest of the weekend and wouldn't come out? Okay.

If mom really did go so far as to insult LW's upbringing and family, then yeah, i tend to believe that sisters were pounding on the door. No one sounds particularly peachy.

I do feel like there's a rigidity to LW, but I hate to just armchair diagnosis mental illness. And if there is mental illness, I really Really REALLY think Hannah should've told her family right off the bat. LW does state they had worked it out with Hannah and had no issues there.

ShesSoCold · April 2018

levioosa said:

Am I the only one who thinks there might be some sort of mental health issue going on? Like, I get all of the points brought up so far, but LW takes an HOUR LONG bath EXACTLY at 6 pm EVERYDAY? What happens if she had moved that to 7pm? Or if she had taken it earlier? Or, just for kicks and giggles, let's say that instead of having houseguests, Hannah was having a birthday or graduation party. It sounds like this is the only available bathroom that is not in the master. Would that change things for the people defending LW's bathroom rights? If there's only one bathroom to use in a shared space, it stands to reason that sometimes your routine is going to be interrupted. The houseguests were also rude, but I just can't get over LW being that solid in her routine that she's not able to make an exception.

I also wonder about the first "pounding" on the door. Like was it really as rude as portrayed or was it a "Hey LW, I was wondering how long you'd be as we're trying to get ready for dinner soon?" And then 20 minutes later, aka 40 minutes into the bath, "Hey LW, we actually have reservations at x time and I have to use the restroom. Will you be out soon?" And if LW stayed in the bath after that I'd be pretty ticked as a guest too. LW is coming off a liiiittlleee bit like a martyr to me. She locked herself in her bedroom the rest of the weekend and wouldn't come out? Okay.

I think this is quite a stretch. I have a routine, a lot of it down to the minute and I like to keep it and I get a little stressed if something throws it off. I don't think that makes me crazy. I don't cry when I can't get on my elliptical at exactly 5:15, but I definitely prefer to. And if I have something else going on at 5:15, then I adjust accordingly.

LW may not have known her roommate's family was currently at the house or that they would need the bathroom. I also don't think we can assume that she was completely unwilling to change her routine here. Like, if I were her, I wouldn't not take my bath just in case someone else might need the bathroom at that time. Sure she should have wrapped her bath up after the first knock, but I think it's a stretch to think she shouldn't have bathed at all - just in case.

charlotte989875 · April 2018

ShesSoCold said:

levioosa said:

Am I the only one who thinks there might be some sort of mental health issue going on? Like, I get all of the points brought up so far, but LW takes an HOUR LONG bath EXACTLY at 6 pm EVERYDAY? What happens if she had moved that to 7pm? Or if she had taken it earlier? Or, just for kicks and giggles, let's say that instead of having houseguests, Hannah was having a birthday or graduation party. It sounds like this is the only available bathroom that is not in the master. Would that change things for the people defending LW's bathroom rights? If there's only one bathroom to use in a shared space, it stands to reason that sometimes your routine is going to be interrupted. The houseguests were also rude, but I just can't get over LW being that solid in her routine that she's not able to make an exception.

I also wonder about the first "pounding" on the door. Like was it really as rude as portrayed or was it a "Hey LW, I was wondering how long you'd be as we're trying to get ready for dinner soon?" And then 20 minutes later, aka 40 minutes into the bath, "Hey LW, we actually have reservations at x time and I have to use the restroom. Will you be out soon?" And if LW stayed in the bath after that I'd be pretty ticked as a guest too. LW is coming off a liiiittlleee bit like a martyr to me. She locked herself in her bedroom the rest of the weekend and wouldn't come out? Okay.

I think this is quite a stretch. I have a routine, a lot of it down to the minute and I like to keep it and I get a little stressed if something throws it off. I don't think that makes me crazy. I don't cry when I can't get on my elliptical at exactly 5:15, but I definitely prefer to. And if I have something else going on at 5:15, then I adjust accordingly.
LW may not have known her roommate's family was currently at the house or that they would need the bathroom. I also don't think we can assume that she was completely unwilling to change her routine here. Like, if I were her, I wouldn't not take my bath just in case someone else might need the bathroom at that time. Sure she should have wrapped her bath up after the first knock, but I think it's a stretch to think she shouldn't have bathed at all - just in case.

I get annoyed when someone is on "my" treadmill in the mornings. Clearly I adjust, but I think we all have our things. I also like to be in my car by 6:05am to get to the gym because I can get an hour run in, shower, and make it to work a few minutes early. Sure, I can adjust but I have a schedule that works for me.

banana468 · April 2018

levioosa said:

Am I the only one who thinks there might be some sort of mental health issue going on? Like, I get all of the points brought up so far, but LW takes an HOUR LONG bath EXACTLY at 6 pm EVERYDAY? What happens if she had moved that to 7pm? Or if she had taken it earlier? Or, just for kicks and giggles, let's say that instead of having houseguests, Hannah was having a birthday or graduation party. It sounds like this is the only available bathroom that is not in the master. Would that change things for the people defending LW's bathroom rights? If there's only one bathroom to use in a shared space, it stands to reason that sometimes your routine is going to be interrupted. The houseguests were also rude, but I just can't get over LW being that solid in her routine that she's not able to make an exception.

I also wonder about the first "pounding" on the door. Like was it really as rude as portrayed or was it a "Hey LW, I was wondering how long you'd be as we're trying to get ready for dinner soon?" And then 20 minutes later, aka 40 minutes into the bath, "Hey LW, we actually have reservations at x time and I have to use the restroom. Will you be out soon?" And if LW stayed in the bath after that I'd be pretty ticked as a guest too. LW is coming off a liiiittlleee bit like a martyr to me. She locked herself in her bedroom the rest of the weekend and wouldn't come out? Okay.

I'm thinking it's a bit more of rigid personality than a mental illness a la Sheldon Cooper type. "It's not Wednesday. I don't wear green on Tuesday."

LondonLisa · April 2018

It's really neither here nor there if its a MH issue, or just a personal preference: you don't pay to be there, you don't get to complain. This is the literal definition of beggars can't be choosers.

If her flatmate had an issue, she should step in.

I would seriously say to the flatmate: "Is there an issue with my nightly routine? Im embarrassed to say that I heard your family saying that I was raised in a barn and very rude for taking a bath. It really hurt my feelings. If there is a problem, please can you come talk to me directly. I like living with you and I don't want there to be problems."

An hour. For. A. Bath.

Re: An hour. For. A. Bath.

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