Dear Prudence,
My two sisters and I each have one daughter and several sons. The girls grew up together—more like sisters than cousins. That relationship has been especially important to my daughter, “May,” who can be shy and doesn’t have loads of friends. She adores her cousins. The older cousin, “April,” has a very jealous nature. She’s well-known for it, and everyone, including April, laughs it off as a quirky, charming flaw. Both my nieces are lovely, but my daughter is beautiful. She’s also a professional athlete. April has always been insecure about this. She doesn’t like to take photos beside my daughter and has thrown tantrums when she sees group photos of them on social media. In recent years, she’s avoided being seen in public with May.
April is getting married in the autumn. We were disappointed but not surprised when she didn’t choose my daughter as a bridesmaid. She asked her other younger cousin, “June,” and two friends instead. We want April to have the happiest, most stress-free day possible. The problem is that April and her mother have felt the need to concoct a story about why she isn’t having May as her bridesmaid. When people who didn’t know them growing up ask, they simply say that April and May have never been that close. To family and friends, they say the girls had a huge falling out a few years ago and have never really made up. That’s completely untrue. They’ve never exchanged a cross word. June and her mother told us about this but are both quite timid and don’t want to call April out on it. May is devastated. She feels she is being written out of their shared history and like she has lost her two sisters. May doesn’t want me to say anything to my sister and April, but I feel really angry about it. I think it’s time we stopped pandering to April’s petty insecurities. Is this worth bringing up, or should I just drop it?
—Poor Cinderella