Dear Prudence,
I’ve been at my job with a small, successful, family-owned business for more than five years. When I was originally hired as a temp, I was overqualified but in need of a steady job. The owner’s son recommended me, and I was hired immediately and quickly promoted to full time. Over the years, I have been eager to take on more responsibilities and continue my education. I have taken several industry-related online classes and gotten certificates. I have always paid for these myself. I am currently studying for some challenging industry exams that will hopefully improve my expertise. I mentioned this to my boss, just as I have in the past, only to be dismissed and ignored. He has referred to me as “kid” for years, even after I asked (and eventually told) him not to. I’m in my mid-30s.
A year ago, when a manager position opened, I submitted my résumé and asked if we could set up a meeting to discuss the opportunity. He blew me off, lost my résumé, ignored my next request to discuss the position, and hired a less qualified candidate, who then left the job only three months later. The position remains unfilled. I love what I do and have worked very hard in my career to gain experience and sharpen my skills. I feel undervalued and often disrespected. After the initial exams, I will need my boss to register me to continue to take further exams. I feel like my boss doesn’t take me seriously because we were introduced through his son, who is a few years younger than me. How can I get my boss to understand that I am a valuable asset to him and his company?
—Uninterested Boss