I'm truly at a loss as to what to do right now. My wedding is in three weeks and I haven't heard from one of my Bridesmaids for a week and a half.
Here's the full rundown:
I got engaged in May 2017 and had asked all five of my closest girls to be in my Bridal Party by that July. All of them were thrilled and excited and everyone got along so well, despite each of them coming from a different part of my life (school friend, reenacting friend, drum corps friend, sports friend, and future sister-in-law). Everyone came out to the dress shopping days we all agreed on and they all planned my Bridal Shower together.
There was a little bit of a SNAFU the week before my Bachelorette Weekend at the beginning of the month and we ended up having to change locations to a different beach and I fronted the hotel bill since it was so last minute. I told the girls it was no big deal about the cost and just to pay me back when they could or piecemeal for their share, which they all agreed was just fine.
As my MOH and I arrived at the hotel, we received a Facebook message from the one Bridesmaid saying there was a family emergency and that she couldn't make it, but she would still chip in her portion. We said it was absolutely no problem and that we hoped everything was okay.
That was the last any of us heard from her.
A couple of days after we got home, I sent her a Facebook message saying that we all missed her and asking if everything was okay. No response. A couple of days later, I texted her asking if she was okay, thinking maybe she just wasn't on Facebook. Still no response. I let a week go by, giving her some space that maybe she needed. I sent another text to her this week asking her to please, please let me know if everything is okay and saying that I'm now concerned that no one has heard from her after saying there was a family emergency and to please just say something. Again, nothing. I called her. No answer. I went back to my Facebook messenger and saw that she was active on it and is still consistently active on it, but she isn't responding to any of my messages, nor my MOH, who has also now reached out to her.
I have now called her work to see if she has even been showing up, and they said she has been there and was there last night for her shift. So I at least know this way that she, herself, is okay.
She hasn't sent me her RSVP, which I had always obviously assumed was a yes, but I don't know if she's bringing a +1, nor do I have her meal option, and she hasn't even told me if she's interested in joining the rest of us in splitting the hair stylist. My wedding is in three weeks. I have to turn all this information in and I don't know what to do. I don't know if this is something serious with her family, or if she just doesn't have the money, or any other reason in the universe. All I'm asking from her is to just respond to me so that we can talk about whatever it is that's going on. We had always called each other sisters when we spent four summers together. We were inseparable. She even road tripped up to Boston to see me when I moved one year, a good eight hours away from where we lived. But now this.
I don't know if I'm overreacting or being selfish. And maybe I am. But in the next breath, it's not like my wedding is in a year, or six months, or even two months. It's in three weeks. I don't even know if it's enough time to find someone else to fill her spot, to purchase the dress and get it fitted, not to mention the exorbitant rush fees, which I would probably pay for just because of the situation I'm putting another girl in. And what if I do go and replace her and purchase the non-returnable dress and then she shows back up apologizing for it all? Do I eat the hundreds of dollars I just spent or make her eat the hundreds of dollars she spent? I have been sick to my stomach over this, breaking down at work and having to hide in empty offices so no one can see me.
Please, anyone help me!