Dear Prudence,
Our parents died when my sister was 18. I am eight years older than her and took up a parental role. I am tired of it. My sister has failed to graduate college, find a permanent job, or bother to think of anyone but herself for the past five years. Over the last three months, my sister has called me crying that her roommates have stiffed her on rent and she is going to be evicted. I finally got fed up and tracked down the roommates and contacted them. My sister was lying to me—her roommates had been paying rent and sent me bank statements to prove it. She spent the money on concerts. I confronted my sister and told her she was a liar and a thief and I was glad our parents were dead rather than see what she has become. She called me a bitch. We haven’t spoken since. Now she is calling me again for money, crying she is going to be homeless. It is true this time because one of the roommates gave me a heads up they are leaving the apartment. I don’t feel guilty, and then I feel guilty about not feeling guilty. I am tired. My sister is 22. I don’t know what to do, but this has to stop. Can you help me?
—Sister, Not Mother