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OK so policy on church but not using their preist

hvcfringehvcfringe
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in Catholic Weddings
So the church I was going to have my wedding at is the whole reason I decided to have my wedding in my college town, that and I loved my campus priest. Now there is only one Catholic church in the town which I have been attending this summer since there is no mass on campus. The church works with the priest that I was going to use so it all worked out. I have not been to impressed with the other priests that are at the church and since the priest I was going to use fell through I don't know if it's ok to use an outside preist. My fiance said that he has a priest that he thinks I would really like. I have already booked the church for the wedding day with them thinking I was going to use the priest I had. So I guess the question in short is what procedures do I need to take now? Can I still use the church even though i'm not using a priest from the parish?
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Re: OK so policy on church but not using their preist

  • darlingcdarlingc
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think this depends on the church. We had to ask permission from the pastor at the church we're getting married at, but it was no problem. We simply wanted to use a priest that I had grown up with and who is closer with my family(he used to be the pastor at the church we're getting married at). You just have to find a way to phrase it so that you don't have to say- "I just don't like any of the other priests here".
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  • chelseamb11chelseamb11 member
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    edited December 2011
    It should be fine, in fact I found out yesterday it's what I am going to have to do.  Most churches are fine with it.  I agree, don't say you don't like the other priest.  Just explain that your FI feels particularly close to this other priest and he wants this priest to officiate your wedding.
     
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  • bibliophile2010bibliophile2010 member
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    edited December 2011
    It shouldn't be a problem to use the parish church, but not the priest. There are pastoral hoops for him to jump through to get permission (these are about making sure the priests are validly ordained, etc., not about jealously protecting the parish from outsiders), but these are taken care of by the priest/office staff, not by you.

    I would ensure that the outside priest is available first. Then talk to the parish staff/the person running your marriage prep/your contact at the parish and tell them that you would like Fr. X from Y to do the nuptial mass and go from there.
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  • enshanleyenshanley
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    edited December 2011
    We had to do the same thing. FI and I both live out of state (where we went to college), but are getting married in our home state in my FI home parish. We really wanted our priest from out of state though (we are both very close to him) and he agreed to travel to marry us. When I called to book the church the priest there actually seemed relieved that we wanted someone else to marry us because then our presiding priest would do marriage prep with us and such. The two priests talked and our presiding priest had to get a letter sent from the Archbishop of our current diocese sent to the Bishop in our home diocese saying that he was in good standing and such. They took care of all of that outside paperwork though. 
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  • kantonikkantonik
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    edited December 2011

    I'm currently going through the same thing as well. We are getting married at my home town church, but I am very close to the priest that was at the parish where I went to college who I would like to have marry us. My hometown parish said, it's fine, that the priest I want to have marry us would just need to get in touch with my parish and workout paperwork and what not, so that they know he will be doing the ceremony instead.

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  • MopsieBMopsieB member
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    edited December 2011
    It's usually fine, but you will have to obtain written permission from the pastor of the church you want to use. Are you also going to use this external priest for pre cana? We did. That simplified things, since he just handled all of our paperwork for us. FYI- most people bring in their own priests, especially if they are family friends. Another thing you can do (which we also did) is have a concelebrant (another outside priest- friend of my husband's).
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