CMGragain member


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  • Re: Cancel and elope? Help!

    CMGragain said:
    Yeah it’s ridiculous and rude to cancel. Let your mom pay! Enjoy it! Enjoy that your friends and family all get to enjoy the day as guests instead of working!
    No, it isn't rude to cancel a wedding, as long as you give enough notice.
    Invitations have been sent. Its in 2 months. Absent a good reason I think that’s too late to cancel. 
    You are talking about standard etiquette.  Two months is plenty of time to cancel.  Two days is not.
    It is possible that the OP can find a venue that will work for the same date and time she had planned, but it isn't likely.  I think this would be the first thing I would check out.  I planned my own wedding in 2 months time.  It can be done.
    Assuming that it isn't possible to find a venue for the same date and time, the other choice is to cancel plans and re-plan the wedding for the closest date possible.
    I came very close to cancelling my own wedding plans and eloping.  I decided to stick it out, but the memories are not good ones.  I don't regret my decision, but it was very stressful.
    When I was working as a church organist, I had been hired by a couple who decided not to get married the day before their ceremony.  The minister was in complete agreement with their decision.  Was it rude?  No.  Should they have gone through with the marriage to please guests?  No.  Was it inconvenient for guests?  Yes, but they understood, and they were supportive of the couple's decision.  Imagine the phone calls!
    Saying that it is rude to cancel a wedding is not correct.  Cancelling a wedding without informing your guests - now THAT is rude!
  • Re: Cancel and elope? Help!

    Just because your Mom will be hosting does not mean that it has to be a formal wedding.  My sister rented a pavilion in a city park for her wedding.  They had a pig roast (professionally done) with potato salad, baked beans, and coleslaw, and beer in cans.  It was very laid back.
    Since Mom will be paying, she does have some input on your plans.  Talk to her and see if you can have a meeting of minds.  Oh, and THANK HER!!!!
  • Re: Lackluster Short Wedding Reception For A DW Dilemma

    We're having a DW in Las Vegas with a guest count of 18 people not including us. Our ceremony would be at 11:30AM and we will be having a 2-hour brunch reception at 12:30PM at a hotel buffet (Wicked Spoon). That's literally 3 hours and I feel horrible, because who want to go to a DW for that short amount of time? Not to mention that it is a DW, but we are actually pretty nontraditional when it comes to reception activities as well since we're not doing any dancing and no toasts. We just wanted to at least give our guests a meal that they could choose whatever food they wanted to eat and how much they wanted to eat with the hotel buffet. Not to mention, Wicked Spoon is actually one of the top buffets in Las Vegas so it's not too shabby. 

    After reception, he and I are going on a 2 hour photo shoot tour on the Las Vegas Strip. I didn't want our guests waiting forever while we got our personal photo shoot done especially if they had to get up early for our wedding.

    We're planning having an optional 'after-party' that would start at 5:30PM for all of guests to make up for our short reception. We would be taking them to a pizza joint (Flour & Barley) on the Linq Promenade for a 2-hour group reservation (we are paying) and then we would take them on 3.5 hour Vegas Strip tour via limo coach to see and explore some of the light shows like the Bellagio Fountains light show, the Fremont experience, and the Las Vegas sign. We would actually be able to get out and check out the places during the tour.

    I guess what I'm trying to get to is that I know this doesn't actually follow proper etiquette for a wedding timeline, but would this be a bad add on for a lackluster short reception since it doesn't have the usual reception activities?

    There's a couple of things I wanted to address: time and food/beverage.

    1) TIME.

    There will be a 3 hour gap between reception and the after party. I will be including 'Things To Do' ideas for timeframe if they didn't wish to go back to their hotels to freshen up, relax, and maybe get ready for the night. Wicked Spoon is at The Cosmopolitan and The Bellagio is next to it (15 min walk). They can hit up the casino at The Bellagio and the Flour & Barley is in the Linq promenade that has the Linq and Flamingo close by, where there are casinos there in both hotels. The Linq promenade is a shopping area with the High Roller and bowling as attractions.

    We can only afford to do the minimum food and beverage package (which means no alcohol, but they'll get unlimited non-alcoholic beverages) for both the Wicked Spoon and Flour & Barley if all 20 of us happen to attend. There are 2-hour bottomless beverage that we will let people know about if they wish to drink, but we don't mind that there is much alcohol involved. We will be having champagne in the limo tour though.

    Feedback and input would be nice. Thanks! :)     
    There is no reason for you to apologize about your wedding plans.  They are perfectly fine!  There is nothing "lackluster" about a short reception as long as there is plenty of good food and drink!  Personally, I cannot dance, and I hate loud music.  I welcome a wedding reception where I can relax, eat and talk with other guests.
    A wedding invitation is not a court summons.  Your guests can choose whether or not they want to attend your wedding.
    A reception is where the couple greets their guests and thanks them for coming to their wedding ceremony.  That is all.  You are providing plenty of food and drink.  Alcohol is not required, especially in the early afternoon.  There is no reason for you to feel bad about your plans.  Forty years ago, it was unusual to have dancing at a wedding reception - especially an afternoon one!  The customs of dancing, bouquet tossing, speeches, etc. are COMPLETELY OPTIONAL!
    Your afterparty plans are not a part of your wedding.  Some guests might choose to return home early and skip it, but I doubt it.  Sounds like fun!
    Have a lovely wedding.  You have planned it well.
  • Re: Etsy and accessories

    When you buy something that is on Etsy, you are not buying from Etsy.  You are buying from the seller who is using the Etsy site.  Just like Ebay.  There are some very good sellers, and there are some very bad ones.
  • Re: Bridesmaid Drama

    If you do kick her out of your wedding party, then YOU will be the bad guy, and people will blame you for being uncaring and rude.  Is that what you want to happen?  I don't think so.  This would make HUGE DRAMA!

    As a bridesmaid, her only obligations are to show up in the dress, on time, stand up at the altar with the other bridesmaids, and smile for the pictures.  That is all she has to do.  Any misbehavior on her part will reflect back on her, not on you.  If SHE decides that this is too much for her, you are off the hook, but YOU cannot decide that she is out of the wedding party.  You asked her to be your bridesmaid.  I'm afraid that this is totally on you.