Jen4948 member


Last Active
  • Re: Charlotte and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

    @charlotte989875, I'm very sorry. That stinks in both senses of the word.

    Today is still young and hopefully something good will happen.
  • Re: Dog at your wedding?

    You should just tell them that your venue doesn't allow animals. Since it isn't a certified therapy dog and not covered under any law the venue doesn't have to allow the dog in their facility, and you have no control over that. This might mean the family member won't attend the wedding though. Personally that wouldn't bother me, but you might want to keep that in mind.
    I would do the same thing. Or I would say, "I'm sorry, but we can't accommodate your dog," the same as with uninvited human guests. What I wouldn't do is engage them in any kind of debate about whether it qualifies as an "emotional support animal."
  • Re: 60th Birthday party at a restaurant

    I know this is not wedding related but I need some feed back and thought of everyone on here. There is some talk in my family about the etiquette of inviting family and friends to help celebrate a 60th birthday at a restaurant and who pays for their food. This is not a formal event just a gathering of family and friends. We are looking at gathering at a local restaurant and having everyone be in the restaurant side room off of the main dining room so everyone could sit together. When we reach out to invite people we would be saying come out and help celebrate this persons birthday at such restaurant at this time. The people invited would order off of the restaurant menu at the table they are sitting at. Some believe that it is tacky and rude to not pay for everyones dinner in this case. Some believe that if it was just family it would be fine for everyone to pay for themselves but when you ask friends to come out to dinner you have to pay for their food. What do people think? Have you ever been invited to have dinner at a restaurant to celebrate a birthday and expected the person inviting you to pay for your meal?
    I expect to pay for my own meals at restaurants at casual get-togethers. But if I'm invited to a party at a restaurant, I expect it to be "hosted." That means that I expect to be expected to cover the cost of neither the honorees' provisions nor my own.

    I think that because this is a milestone birthday party and your relatives are expecting to be "hosted," then that's what you need to do and not expect everyone to pay for themselves. If necessary, do it somewhere other than at a restaurant.
  • Re: Monday, ie who else doesn't get President's Day off?

    @short+sassy, I'm sorry that you feel sick. I hope you're better soon.

    I had a falling-out with my mother this weekend over a weird and stupid Facebook demand that led to my deactivating my Facebook account for the indefinite future. She wants me, my dad, and my brother not to respond to any Facebook comments she leaves on someone else's wall, even saying, "Why would you want to reply to my posts?" and "Write your own responses!" So obnoxiously controlling. I pointed out that she's only allowed to control her own Facebook usage and not anyone else's (she has no minor dependents) and suggested defriending her. Then she became really nasty, actually going so far to threaten to "defriend" me in real life. 

    I'm appreciating the break from all the BS on Facebook, hers and others', at the moment so it may be an extended deactivation.
  • Re: Guest attire for fantasy themed wedding

    MandyMost said:
    CMGragain said:
    There are times when you want your guests to know the exact formality of your wedding day. 
    “It’s important to understand the difference between a black tie event and formal attire,” says wedding planner Christine Zohrabians. “I’ve seen so many couples who list the dress code as a black tie event when they really mean formal attire.”
    You are not having a black tie or a formal wedding.  Therefore this advice does not apply to you.

    I am so sorry that you do not understand basic etiquette.  It is very rude to tell your guests what to wear to anything except a costume party.  A wedding is NOT a costume party.

    I have been to many black tie events when I lived in Washington, DC.  I have never been to a formal (white tie) event, though they are more common in Europe and in diplomatic circles.  @artbyallie 's description of these events in correct.
    But why not? Why can't a wedding be a costume party? Any costume party I've ever been to has been a "costumes encouraged" type of thing where you weren't kicked out if you didn't dress up. Seriously, why can't a wedding be a costume party? People can of course choose to not wear a costume, or not go, but why not? And if you're having a costume party, you can't assume that guests will read your mind, you have to tell them it's a costume party.
    Because it's inappropriate to give wedding guests (other than wedding party members) instructions on how to dress.

    Also, when guests already have to take time and money out of their lives to travel to the venues, dress up and give you a gift, expecting them to come in a specified costume (if they're not wedding party members) is too much. Costumes can be expensive, and not everyone who wants to attend a wedding wants to masquerade as someone they're not.