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There are topics on this board that i read and think, "Yep, definitely rude, definitely an actual etiquette issue."
And then there are topics on this board that I read and think, "Oh, this is just guests being extra."
This is just guests being extra.
EvilSockLady said:I'm not sure what's really etiquette approved or what's on the hosts and what isn't... but I know as a guest, if I were invited to a wedding and then had to pay to park and then walk three blocks in heels it would leave a bad taste in my mouth and would likely be one of my biggest take aways from the wedding.
And if the wedding had a bunch of frills (favors, photobooth, really expensive bridal gown, etc) I'd judge the couple.
I know some cities it's hard to find parking in. But by the same token, I think lots of downtown venues tend to be on the higher-end. There are always exceptions, but lots of times you can find more affordable venues in suburban and rural areas where it's easier to park.
I feel like if you're going to go all the way and have a fancy venue, that valet is almost an expectation.
Change into flats? Oh, well then just slip them on to walk to the venue.
Or have your Spouse/Partner/Date/Uber drop you off right at the door.
I don't personally expect a couple to provide expensive valet service for me- in the major cities valet services are quite pricey. As an adult I can figure out how to get my ass into the venue in the most comfortable fashion for me, lol.
I would much rather the couple invest their money on the things that actually matter at their reception- the food and beverages, music, etc.aurianna said:
Maybe I've just been spoiled so I don't understand?
In most cases shuttle services, paid parking, and valet services are really nice bonuses. Most city weddings I've been to have had none of those provided for me as a guest.
I have used Uber, carpooled with other guests, rented cars, paid for parking, and walked many, many times.
The only weddings I have been to where a shuttle was provided were situations in which the wedding site and reception venues were pretty far apart from each other and far from the main hotel where the couple had arranged room blocks.
STARMOON44 said:Honestly I wouldn’t spend any time worrying about this or talking to her about it. I’d go outside for max 5 minutes, and then return inside. I don’t need her permission or agreement to do that. I’d simply carry on as though she can’t possibly be serious and it wasn’t happening because for me it wouldn’t be.
We are at sub zero temps here today with a windchill that puts us at -27 degrees; I commuted to work by bus today in lined winter boots, a full length down maxi coat, scarf up to my eyeballs, hat , and gloves because at these temps frostbite can hit within 20mins or so.
I would under no circumstances whatsoever go outside in this weather in a flimsy strapless BM dress for any length of time.
Your friend need to seriously get a fucking grip. Tell her no, and if she tries to insist on the wedding day tell her no again and just walk away.
KahluaKoala said:I don't get why people think this poster doesn't have to but are roasting the other poster for not paying for parking. I don't think you need a shuttle, and I don't think you need to organize a valet or parking. I feel like this is consistent
In most circumstances, I don't think the couple needs to arrange transportation for guests, pay for parking, pay for valet service, etc.
southernbelle0915 said:charlotte989875 said:So curious about what people think about venue parking? What if the venue has parking but it’s paid only— would the couple be expected to pay for parking then?
I guess the the way I see it is once people get to the venue location they should be expected to pay for anything, including entering a parking lot/ramp. If there are a bunch of free spaces around then sure, no problem there’s accessible free parking. If people opt to take a cab instead of walk from free parking, awesome. But I think it gets blurry when the only parking options are all paid places AND it’s a city/location where driving is the primary means of transportation.
This situation is basically that PLUS making them walk. I remember a thread where a couple was getting married at a beach and there were only like 10 FREE parking spots at the entrance to the beach. A quarter mile or so down the road, there was a big lot where lots of people could park (also FREE). She was asking if that was ok or if she should have a shuttle. I don't think there was one reg on here who didn't shame her crappy planning and tell her to get a shuttle. I will reiterate: that parking was FREE.
This person wants to make guests pay AND make them walk. It's ok because it's a city? IMO, no. You choose to get married in a city (or wherever) you need to cover these kinds of costs and not make your guests hike to your event.
If guests don't want to or can't walk, they can get dropped off at the entrance to OP's venue, get a taxi, get an Uber, carpool, etc. Lots of options.
I'm with Starmoon and others in that I don't see this as a big deal. This isn't on the level of a gap or lack of chairs or a cash bar.
The guests can figure out how they are going to get to the venue and where they are going to park, even if they have to pay for it and walk. If I were OP I wouldn't kill myself trying to rework my budget over this one.
And for the record we paid for some valet parking, but most guests did not utilize it.