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  • Shower invites for folks not at the wedding?

    I was unsure where to put this so I apologize if I chose the wrong one. 

    I'm having a very small wedding. There will be 13 guests, no wedding party, so 15 people in all if you count us. My future mother in-law is very excited to do a shower. She thinks we need one badly since we will be moving into our first place together after the wedding. But she seems to think that 13 people ( 8 if you think showers should just be ladies) is an unacceptable number of folks to invite. 

    I'm of the opinion that you don't invite folks to the shower that aren't invited to the wedding and if she thinks that 8 people is too small we should just skip it all together.

    MIL thinks that she should invite all the older ladies from my church ( they typically have a group of older ladies that get together and help new couples set up house, by getting a few things/coming over and helping put stuff in place/sharing recipes etc) to a shower but not the wedding. She says a shower just lets these ladies do what they were going to do anyway in one space instead of surprising me by showing up at my new house when we're trying to move in. 

    I'm fine with the ladies doing their version of passing on marriage advice/supplies (this is what they refer to it as), but feel super awkward about pretty much asking them for stuff. Maybe they weren't planning on coming over and helping or sharing recipes, just because they have done it doesn't make it mandatory. I feel like inviting them to a shower makes it mandatory, and more about stuff than support (which is what I think they are trying to offer). Am I right to feel weird about this? 
    JediElizabethSP29
  • Re: Church Members

    I think the point of it being open, is that it is a church service that anyone can attend. That being the case, people who find out about the wedding via a bulletin or what have you don't need to be invited to the reception. They aren't being sent invitations to the wedding. This is true of other denominations than Catholic. If the church meets in a public building, it is open to the public. It doesn't have to be a "church". I assumed that OP is being married where the church normally meets (I may be wrong about that). If that is the case, people can come to the wedding and not be invited to the reception. I was married in a large chapel on a university campus. Anyone could've walked in who wanted to come. I saw people I didn't even know in pictures from the church. They were certainly not invited to the reception.
    I'll agree with this. All the weddings at my church are technically open. It is a service at the church so any members are welcome invite or no while the reception is a private party. Now you can't invite someone just to the ceremony but if one of the older ladies sees the wedding is happening on x date and decides to show up or if the choir is practicing down the hall and comes over to witness the wedding, it's a church service they are welcome to join in. 

    I will point out that our weddings do tend to be more along the lines of a normal religious service ( at least compared to some of the different religious weddings I've been to) our pastor tends to talk a lot about scripture during the wedding, and have what I'm sure is probably considered a mini sermon.  So people dropping by probably feel like it's a combo of normal service with some wedding included. 
    MesmrEwe
  • Re: The dogs can't be left for a couple hours?

    This is so inconsiderate. Those dogs would never have made it into my house. I have severe allergies. Seriously who just informs people they're bringing over their pets, they have no idea if people can handle having animals around. 
    MesmrEwe
  • Re: Groom's attire color question

    Honestly, I would skip the navy vest. It could just be me but colored vests scream "prom" to me... I like how the vest in the above photo matches the suit.

    Hm, never thought about it being promy. Thanks!
    PamBeesly524
  • Re: Article About Step-Dad Pulling Funds

    I'm waiting for the snopes article on this.  The article says that the wedding was set to take place on Nov 3rd.  That's a Tuesday this year.  So this must be at least 3 years old.


    It is. I saw this on reddit like two years ago. I mean it might be true, but it's old. 

    MesmrEwecharcoalandblushemmaaa