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  • Re: Bad Pet Owners

    I hope your dog is OK and that this bad experience doesn't end up making him anxious around other dogs!

    It sucks how many people here have experienced bad dog owners. It's so sad. I also hate people's reactions to certain breads or the size of dogs. Some of the nicest dogs I've met have been 80+lbs and breads like rotties or pitts. Some of the worst have been the smaller "lap dog" that the owners just don't control. I feel so bad for the badly behaved dogs because i know it's not their fault it's their owners.
  • Re: Would you sideeye no "real" meat?

    I also vote for the Green Tomatoes because i LOVE them. I get that there'd be tomato and tomato soup but honestly they are two totally different flavors IMO.  I am a vegetarian but honestly that didn't really weigh into my opinion because that's still what I would have picked back when I did eat meat. I need to start growing my own tomatoes b/c green tomatoes are impossible to find in grocery stores in Maine...
  • Re: ending the reception ideas

    We did a sparkler sendoff and it was great. Make sure to get the at least 20" sparklers so that they last. We have a bunch left over so we're going to have July 4th this year :)

  • Re: Shower Drama with FI and Mom

    scribe95 said:
    I have to disagree. I feel like numerous threads like this have said mom, grandma and siblings should be invited from FI's side to all showers but it is generally up to FI's side if they want to throw a shower for his side and invite everyone. There is absolutely nothing stopping someone on his side from offering. Then she would have two intimate showers. 
    I agree with this but I also think OP's response was really harsh. She basically said that FI's family was, in some way, not worthy of being invited because they have different dynamics. My family is a lot like your FI's. Our get-togethers are rare and they are so precious because they are rare! I would be incredibly hurt to realize that my family is being cut out from celebrating our pending nuptials because they don't have the same opportunities to gather as DH's family does.

    OP, I think it's fine that you don't want FI's family at your family shower, but a more diplomatic response would have been "I really was looking forward to celebrating with those that I am close with - my aunts and cousins, but would be open to having a second shower with FI's family, if someone would like to host it." That would have taken the pressure off of you and put the ball in your FI's family court.

    Obviously, it's too late to respond like that now, but you can always apologize. Talk to your FI. Tell him you're sorry, you didn't mean to just cut out his family, and suggest a solution - whether that is having one huge shower that involves everyone, or being open to a second shower for his family.

    FWIW, all of my showers were split - one with DH's family, one with mine, and one with my friends, and it worked out really well.
    This, I don't think you're wrong in not wanting to invite more than his immediate family to your shower but it was how you said it that hurt his feelings. I know you didn't mean it that way but the way you said it made it sound like his family is less important than yours and that's obviously not true.

    I'd apologize to him and also stop using the excuse of it being intimate because we had 40 people total at our wedding so 40 is not an intimate shower. Honestly I wouldn't have described our wedding as intimate, it was small but intimate is like 10-15 people. If you are open to a second shower with his family let him know that and wait to see if someone offers to host it. Also if your mom doesn't want help from your FMIL then she shouldn't ask her, being invited but not asked to help might give her the idea to host one with her family.
  • Re: What do you call your in-laws?

    I love my ILs but I really struggle at what to call them. I got up the nerve to ask once and they said whatever I felt comfortable with so that wasn't really helpful. I kind of avoid addressing them by name but when I do have to I use first names. I'd like to call them mom and dad but idk how they'd take it. Hopefully when we have a kid I can call them Nana and Grandpappy and then won't need to worry anymore.

    DH said he won't call my parents mom and dad so he uses first names and that's totally fine (some days I don't even want to call them that... we have a strained relationship atm).

    I call DH's grandma Grammy like DH does and I call his Aunts/Uncles Aunt/Uncle [Firstname]. DH does the same with my side.