Catholic Weddings — The Knot Community

OOT

bibliophile2010 — Thu, 09 Jun 2011 15:28:37 +0000

In the middle of all my pre-wedding meetings this week, I was able to get a reading on the tides, and it looks like your birthday is still in one month!

Gulp! I mean, I'm super excited and things are rolling along nicely, but where did the last 11 months go?!?

riss

Calypso1977 — Thu, 09 Jun 2011 15:08:57 +0000

Please post your readings for CW Board Site!

Riss91 — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 17:14:32 +0000

Hey ladies!

I've been working on creating a site/bio for the board that will include the basic Catholic Wedding info and helpful tips. It will be linked in a sticky with some general info for newcomers. Please post your ceremony readings and include all references to make it user-friendly. Thanks!

For OOT

mica178 — Wed, 08 Jun 2011 07:21:29 +0000

H's friend gave the graduation speech for the Miami Sacred Heart, and I thought you'd appreciate it, since it mentions a lot about the schools' founder:

I. Madeleine Sophie
Usually for graduations, I end up quoting Socrates or Mark Twain or Winston Churchill. Today, as you young women of the Sacred Heart leave Carrollton for colleges and universities all over the country, I would like to quote our spiritual mother, St Madeleine Sophie-Barat.
II. All those letters
As you make this important step in your lives and look to your futures, I would like to pause and reflect back on what Madeline Sophie might have to say to you today. After all, without her, we would not be here. Without her, there would be no Society of the Sacred Heart. Without the Society of the Sacred Heart, this campus would very like be a another Vizcaya on the Bay. Madeline Sophie wrote over 14, 000 letters. And that was before computers, e-mail or internet. Those letters expose the mind and heart of Madeline Sophie. She was not a 21st century woman, she was not even a 20th century woman. She was a 19th century woman and it shows in those letters. She was an elegant, refined, intelligent and deeply sensitive lady. If you can read French, I strongly encourage to pick up those letters. Let us look at what advice and inspiration Madeline Sophie might have for you as you go off into the world.
III. “In our struggle ...”
Madeleine Sophie wrote, “In our struggle concerning education, the heart of Jesus asks from us not our blood but our minds. We must strengthen our studies by intellectual work. There is no question of flight from this task. The directors of institutions — Roman, Catholic and apostolic — tell us, poor women who are authorized by the Church to teach, that we must hold our own, and then measure ourselves against the University.” God, I respect this woman! Two of the main problems which are plaguing our society and our Church are laziness and stupidity. Madeline Sophie would have none of it, none of it for herself and none of it for you, her daughters. Jesus came to take away your sins, not your brains. No matter how beautiful you may be on the outside – and you are all quite lovely today in your elegant dresses tonight – the greatest gift God gave you is not soft skin, a pretty smile or a nice figure. The greatest gift God gave you is a beautiful mind. Never allow yourselves to be treated as pretty dolls. You are infinitely more and better than that. As St Thomas More said: “God made plants for their simplicity and animals for their innocence, But God made human beings to serve God wittily, in the tangle of our minds.”
IV. Remain children of the Sacred Heart
Madeline Sophie was deeply committed to the notion that if the Society turned out brilliant women with cold hearts, the Society would be a failure. Education does not only, or even essentially, take place at the intellectual level. To “educate” comes from two Latin words: e and ducare which means to lead out of. To lead out of what? To lead out of fear, darkness and ignorance. We serve the Sacred Heart of Jesus Christ, not the scared heart of those who rule their lives by fear and the power that keeps fear at bay. I did mass yesterday with the second grade, who received their first communion this year. I wish I could have photographed their faces as they received communion – they are so full of faith, hope and love. Our prayer for each of you is: no matter what life might throw at you, may your hearts remain child-like. No matter how old or smart or great you become, may you always remain children of the Sacred Heart ... You have the minds and bodies of women; always keep the hearts of little girls, hearts full of wonder, joy and gratitude! St. Madeleine Sophie Barat, pray for us!

NWR: Addressing outside of church

mcdol3 — Tue, 07 Jun 2011 14:30:46 +0000

We went to a music concert my RCIA sponser and her family were hosting Saturday. Father Piotr and Deacon Albert were both there.
FH asked me a question I wasn't sure the answer to.
We both know outside of the church we still call him Father Piotr. Do we still refer to Albert as Deacon? I ran into him in the street yesterday as well and wasn't sure.

priest stipend/gift

amyj712 — Wed, 08 Jun 2011 02:33:13 +0000

Hello all, what are most of you giving your priest for a stipend/gift? My parish did not give me any guidlines on this. I don't know our priest very well so don't really have gift ideas and was leaning towards cash-our original presider backed out two weeks ago due to a trip. Thanks very much for your help!

scheduling around mass times...

nanoka — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 04:11:14 +0000

ok just a quick opinion check... which sounds better...

Question about Readers

vanddharvey — Wed, 01 Jun 2011 15:55:25 +0000

My fiance is Episcopalian but we are getting married in the Catholic Church. To make sure we included people from his family/friends we have one of his friends reading the first reading and the petitions.....but as I got to thinking about it, I wonder if the person doing the readings has to be Catholic as well, or if they can be of any Christian denomination.

Anyone have any info about this?

XP: AW: Pro Pics

doctabroccoli — Wed, 01 Jun 2011 17:23:25 +0000

Once upon a time, there were two Veggies from Cleveland who traveled to a far far away land called St. Louis to get married.

Mrs. Veggie was walked down the aisle by both of her parents:

Their ceremony was a grand celebration:

Afterwards the Veggies and their friends visited the Arch.

Mr. and Mrs. Veggie spent some time smooching by the flooded Mississippi River.

There were lots of hot girls involved.

And sexy gentlemen.

The Veggies cheered on their favorite teams.

And picked each other's noses.

They hung out by the stadium a little more.

Then headed out for a different location.

They humped like rabbits...... wait, that didn't happen until later.

And then went inside this strange public art installation of walls that probably houses muggers.

Mrs. Veggie had to run away from said muggers (okay, not really).

Everyone walked in the street to try to get hit by cars.

They arrived at the reception in their super sweet ride.

There was a grand feast had by all.

After the feast, there was some cake smashing (with proper protection boasting the phrases "Eat and Shut Up" and "Forget About It" in Italenglish).

And plenty of Italian cookies.

There was also a lot of terrible singing.

And everyone danced the night away!

The end!

NWR: What is the Catholic chuch's view on cord blood banking?

Thinkerbelle80 — Sun, 05 Jun 2011 00:13:03 +0000

Hi girls,

I'm already married but I need a Catholic board to ask... what is the Catholic church's view on cord blood banking? Does anyone know?

Inviting the Priest?

mlf84 — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 17:03:50 +0000

Hi All,

This might be a silly question, but I'm wondering what the protocol is for inviting the priest to the reception. Did you just mail an invitation to the rectory like any other guest? It seems weird to invite him to the wedding, since he HAS to be there!

We want to invite our priest, but we don't know him terribly well (we've only lived in his parish a year or so), so I'm not sure how to go about it!

Thanks in advance for any adivce!

-Monica

The nest

shawna127 — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 15:26:49 +0000

Sorry this is not wedding relatated :( But does anyone know why there isn't a catholic board on the nest? Or how we could ask for one because I'm sure that it would do well...and there are many catholic related questions beyond weddings...just a thought :o) Hope everyone is having a great day

wedding in same church as parents & grandparents: OK to mention in program?

AllysOop — Sun, 05 Jun 2011 22:47:06 +0000

Hi ladies,
Not sure if this is the right board to post on, but I lurk on here a lot and have gotten some great advice and ideas (so, thanks!). We are having a full Catholic mass for our wedding but I don't think my question even has anything to do with whether the mass is Catholic or not, but I thought I could get some good inputs and answers here...

FI & I are getting married in the cathedral that both my parents and grandparents were married in (30+ & 60+ years ago). FI & I are very honored/proud/excited that we are able to do this. Would it be appropriate to mention this somewhere in the program... or would that be odd? Any ideas for wording of this?

Would the fact that FI's parents are divorced make it at all odd to mention about my parents/grandparents? I would love to mention it but just don't know if its a sensitive subject (been divorced over 10 years)? FI is just as excited about this as I am so I would assume he thinks its a great idea to mention and share with our family/friends -- I'll ask him of course, but wanted to get your thoughts as well.

Thanks!

Upcoming Weddings!

mica178 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 01:01:19 +0000

Congratulations to our brides-to-be!

June

11 -- Terezco

18 -- Mcdol, DFWIndian, Eledge

25 -- KatieAnne, Equine Osmosis, MopsieB, pianobuggy

July

9 -- Bibliophile
16 -- BrideBling82

August

6 -- Lisa, Linzluvsgzuss
13 -- Misscyndikalene, Meg
27 -- Jimmyandkatie

September

3 -- jmorford
16 -- Irishcurls

October
15 -- lmeade62

November
5 -- professorscience

And to our newlyweds!!!!!

April

30 -- Docta, Wifeandmommy

May

14 -- Aimers

28 -- Newlyseliski, Buckeyesweetz, christyhal
29 -- threepinkroses

June

3 -- GeorgiaPeach
4 -- vanddharvey

Let us know your date if you want your name up here too (or just add your name to the list)!

Remarriage Seminar

lmeade62 — Sun, 05 Jun 2011 23:32:51 +0000

Ron and I went to our remarriage seminar yesterday...

For the most part, I thought it was quite good, though he had hoped for something a little less generic and a little more Catholic-centered. A lot of what was talked about we had read already in the books we've gotten (incuding your many wonderful suggestions, thank you!).

I think the best part was when we got to talk to each other about things like our former spouses and a conflict that we thought was successfully resolved and what the end result was of that. I also loved that we were asked how we were God's gift to each other - I had to say not only how he was God's gift to me (easy) but also how I was God's gift to him (harder).

We were disappointed that there weren't more exercises, in addition to it not being as Catholic as we would have liked. It was a fairly large group - at least 28 people or so, and surprisingly, most of the couples were mixed. I think we were only one of two or three couples who were both Catholic.

We did get an interesting little book to use, and the day stimulated a lot of really good conversation on the way home, which I think was one of the most valuable things of all.

I emailed our church secretary this morning and asked if we could meet with our priest a few times to talk about the more specific Catholic subjects...and how we can really incorporate our faith into our relationship.

Anyway, it was pretty cool, and just one more sign that this is REAL and it's coming up...132 days to go!

Linda

Ideas for New and Old Testament Readings....my fiance is not very religious

mjl1002 — Sun, 05 Jun 2011 16:35:50 +0000

I am having trouble picking out a reading from the new and old testament. My fiance is not very religious, however he is respecting my need to have a catholic mass. I am trying to find a reading that gets to the point and that is not too long. Any ideas? Please share! I only have a few weeks to go, so I am feeling a little behind in this area.
Thanks!

Sponsor Couple - question

chrissyinatl — Sun, 05 Jun 2011 18:44:49 +0000

We are meeting with our Sponsor Couple for the 1st time this week. I have a few questions:

1. Are we supposed to bring snacks to their house? I thought I read something about this. If so, what did you bring to your sponsor couple's house? Obviously we have never met them.

2. How many meetings did you have?

3. How long were these sessions?

4. Did anyone make a long lasting friendship with their sponsor couple?

Thanks in advance!

Presentation of Flowers to Mary's Altar

onthego11 — Sat, 28 May 2011 13:26:37 +0000

I'm going out today to order flowers for Mary's Altar, but I've heard of placing 3 flowers to placing bouquets. What are you doing and what type of flowers are you using?

Having trouble finding NFP class

AwayWeGo08 — Mon, 16 May 2011 20:02:57 +0000

You would think the diocese would make it easy to find one, but not so much. The office refereed me to a website that has only books, no classes, I have Googled my heart out and can not find ANYTHING except a class through the Couple to Couple League an hour away and not in my diocese. Am I missing some sort of centralized list or website of information? How did you find a class ( if you attended one ) ?

Mass Times Question

MissOwl — Sat, 04 Jun 2011 16:40:59 +0000

Hello ladies!

I am in a little pickle. My fiancé and I have booked the only date available at our dream reception venue for September 8, 2012. We're thrilled about it but the church we now attend has only the early ceremony slot available (1:30pm). I had dreamed of having the 6pm slot, but it was filled just last week. We cannot change the reception date now because there are no other dates available. Regarding the ceremony, should we...

1. take the 1:30pm slot at the church we currently attend

2. take the 2:30pm slot at my grandparents church (10 minute drive)

3. take the 5:30pm slot at a sister church to our chuch (we do not go there but it is in the neighborhood and the two churches work together)

I really want an evening wedding and since 90% of our guests are out of town and I would really like to avoid a gap if at all possible.

Thoughts?

Best Wishes to this Weekend's Brides!

GeorgiaPeachMarie — Sat, 28 May 2011 14:14:27 +0000

Congratulations and best wishes to all of the brides getting married this weekend. I'm thinking and praying for you on this special day. Congrats Newlyseliski, Buckeyesweetz, christyhal and threepinkroses. I hope it is a day filled with love!

Long engagement turning short.. advice please!!

J9andKev — Tue, 31 May 2011 00:27:54 +0000

My fiance and I have been engaged for a little over a month. We orignally picked a date after he got out of the Marine Corps, which is in 2 years. We now know where he is deploying to in January. I can say that it's not a good place to be. He's worried that the unspeakable is going to happen and he won't be returning home. He wants to ensure that I'm taken care of if that does happen and suggested moving the date up 2 years (to this October). My parents are finally getting used to the idea that their only girl is getting married. What's the best way to tell them? Also, I want to get married in a church rather than just go to the courthouse. Is this possible? Do you think moving the wedding up is a good idea? HELP!

Is Wearing Black ok?

ravenray — Sat, 28 May 2011 22:37:15 +0000

Is it okay to wear black to a Catholic wedding? I am attending a catholic wedding next week. I am Russian Orthodox and I know they have some feast days on which you are suppose to wear a certain color. I don't want to offend anyone and I can find something else to wear, I just look good in black and if I can wear it I would like to but I am more than happy to wear something else. I just don't want to offend anyone. Help?

Time gap b/t ceremony and reception

jimmyandkatie — Sat, 28 May 2011 03:44:03 +0000

Hey everyone,

My ceremony will be starting at 3pm and will end around 3:45ish (it's Catholic). My cocktail hour will be starting at 5. The reception venue is about 20 mins away but I thought most guests would stay for a little while at the church to talk and such, and a lot of the people will be in the pictures becuase it's mostly family. Do you think the hour long wait is too long for guests to wait? I really wanted a lot of time for pictures so I did not feel rushed and I wanted to attend the end of my cocktail hour because I wanted to get some of the greetings out of the way so I could enjoy my day more. The other option would be having the cocktail hour start at 4:30.

Is your priest attending the reception?

Megaphone2752 — Sat, 21 May 2011 03:58:54 +0000

We got the RSVP from our priest today and he's coming to our reception. We know him a little bit, but we lived out of state this year, and since I'm sure he gets invited to tons of weddings, I didn't think he's accept. I like him and I'm glad he's coming, but I was wondering how many other people had their priest accept?

music woes

SillyLGoose — Mon, 23 May 2011 22:56:07 +0000

The music guy at my church was extremely judgmental and quite annoyed with my music choices!

Any heard of Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring not being appropriate for wedding entrance, or Here, I am Lord not o.k. for communion? I understand if there's some reason but he wasn't really giving me one.

Now I have some kind of trumpet song that makes me feel like some Queen! (not in a good way).

Is the music going to break or break it? No. But I love church music and I'm a little bummed it isn't going the way I had hoped.

Any words of wisdom?

Incorporating Traditional (Latin) Details into a Mixed Wedding?

HelloKaty37 — Sun, 29 May 2011 02:25:21 +0000

I haven't yet met with my priest to discuss the wedding, but so that I don't show up with several hundred questions, I thought I would pick the brains of you ladies first.

I'm a graduate student studying the European Middle Ages and have developed an interest in the liturgical and doctrinal history of the Church. Because of that, I have gained a great appreciation for the Latin Mass. I alternate between attending Tridentine Mass and the English Mass regularly held at my parish, but even the English Mass incorporates Latin hymns and is very traditional compared to other parishes I have been a part of. Ideally, I would have a traditional Tridentine Nuptial Mass, but my situation isn't exactly conducive to that option.

My fiancè and I are both trained in Latin, so I have no doubt that he would be able to follow the Latin Mass (not really sure what to call a Tridentine Nuptial Mass that is technically outside of Mass), though I would of course explain the significance of each part to him, since he is not Catholic. His family and mine, however, are mostly Protestant or aetheist and therefore would probably not experience the Latin Mass as it is supposed to be (as a deeply religious event) but rather as something ancient, outdated, and possibly just for show.

I would love to find a way to have my wedding in a way that incorporates my love of traditional Catholicism while also making both families comfortable, so I'm leaning towards having a English ceremony (outside of Mass) with Latin elements. Does anyone have any ideas of how to do this or recommendations for other solutions?

Friday Wedding

KKurkosky — Sun, 29 May 2011 03:21:55 +0000

Hey Ladies!
I'm completely at a loss as far as how my wedding will work out so far. The date my fiance and I have picked seems to not be open for a reception site but is set up with the church, on a Saturday in June of 2012. Living in a smaller town, we are limited to the places we can hold our reception. Many of the weddings I have been to are not Catholic ones, has anyone heard of or been to a Catholic wedding on a Friday?
Any suggestions are very welcome! Things have turned from stressful to completely overwhelming and frustrating!
Thanks!

My parents are married, his are divorced--how to handle the reception?

TobieRose — Sun, 29 May 2011 21:25:42 +0000

My parents will be celebrating 26 years of marriage this June, but my fiance's parents are divorced. His parents aren't so hostile that they can't speak to each other, but things are pretty uncomfortable between them.

I've already talked to my fiance about managing the seating arrangements etc and am not really worried about that. But there are a few things I'm not sure how to handle. For example, I want my parents to have a dance together at the reception, because they deserve it: they have been a beautiful example my entire life of what a holy, loving marriage looks like. I also would like to honor them by having them announced together as they enter the reception.

But how do we go about announcing *his* parents? Do they walk in by themselves? I feel bad because I don't want to make things awkward by calling attention to the fact they're divorced, but at the same time I don't think it's right to make my parents give certain things up (their dance, being announced together)--especially on a day that's a celebration of marriage!

Does anyone have any advice? Thanks! :)

long weekend! whatcha all up to?

Calypso1977 — Fri, 27 May 2011 13:29:40 +0000

3 days off. gonna do some golfing. didnt get invited to any BBQ's tho, i'm kinda bummed.