Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions — The Knot Community

Victorian/ Alice in Wonderland Wedding

HinaChan — Thu, 14 Jun 2012 01:11:27 +0000

I am getting married May 4th, 2013 and I am trying to figure out how to make this a wonderful day for my fiance and myself but I am getting stuck on some ideas. I have an idea on my bridal party dresses and my wedding dress but I am not sure on hair and flowers... I am really not a girly girl so I am not used to all the questions on these types of things >.< Any help would be most appreciated!

Rehearsal Dinner

jbates926 — Sun, 05 Aug 2012 22:38:09 +0000

I need help deciding who to invite to the rehearsal dinner.

Our wedding is somewhat a "destination wedding." The wedding is just over a 4 hour drive at a minimum for everyone coming to the wedding, so everyone is from out of town. My future mother in law rented a house to have the rehearsal dinner at as we are just wanting to have a quaint little BBQ, nothing too fancy. Just to invite the key people (parents, siblings, bridal party and spouses and officiant) we are at 33. If we extend it to "immediate family" we up the number to almost 70 which I think is too many for the house/property that we have rented for this.

I feel bad not inviting immediate family, as they have all traveled so far for the wedding. Is it rude not to invite them?

Any thoughts would be appreciated.

photographer vs venue in vegas

randi.gamble — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 21:31:08 +0000

my husband and I want to renew our vows in vegas next summer. I've been lookingat some of the chapels and most of the photographs suck and I'm pretty sure you cant bring in your own photographer. We either need to find a chapel with a good photographer or a good photographer that knows some other place where we can renew our vows cheaply...we don't need anything official since we are already married and it's just us two...just a pretty backdrop and a great photographer to capture the moment...any ideas?

Church changing things up on us two months before...

Vermon2012 — Mon, 06 Aug 2012 18:07:21 +0000

Hey girls,
I need your opinion on something. We have had the church booked for over a year. Just a couple of weeks ago, we were asked by someone at the church if we were going to be taking pictures after the ceremony. We replied that we probably wouldn't be because we are getting to the church early enough to get them done beforehand (and then our guests don't have to wait). They told us they were scheduling another wedding that day at 6pm (keep in mind our is at 3pm). We were a little mad to hear this because the church hasn't been the easiest to deal with. We were promised the worship center for the whole day and when we originally went to reserve our date a year ago, we found that it wasn't reserved (due to some communication issues). We now have had our date set since last November and they have sprung this on us when our wedding is in two months. The biggest thing is that I don't want to be doing the receiving line and having people that I don't know wanting to check out the sanctuary, be poking around, etc. We're not quite sure what to do at this time since we feel like our trust in the church has been broken and we're not sure if we even want this pastor to marry us. When we brought these issues to her, she laid on the Christian guilt and said it shouldn't matter, etc. What would you guys do?

Unity Candle/Sand Ceremony

bettker88 — Mon, 06 Aug 2012 16:40:52 +0000

My FI and I can't seem to decide which ceremony is best for us. I've always wanted a unity candle, however, I would like something that we could display and not something that will end up stuck in a box somewhere. My FI liked the idea of the sand and the fact that we could display it on our mantle afterwards as a constant reminder of the promise we make. (Sweet, right?)

So, to compromise, I found this idea where you could engrave a glass vase and use a floating candle. The church doesn't automatically include it, but we are more than welcome to incorporate it into the ceremony.

How did you decide as well as keep the budget in mind?

Peacock Wedding Theme

shellym13 — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 18:47:32 +0000

I want to incorporate peacock colors into my wedding but I do not want it to look like a peacock came in and threw up all over the place. :) I found some bridesmaid dresses in a dark til but now I'm not going with that style and I cannot find that exact color on any other dress that I like. So I am having to change my bridesmaid colors. Any ideas?

Shelly

Does a RB have to be male?

UberBiz — Mon, 06 Aug 2012 13:32:38 +0000

My fiance and I each have a daughter. Depending on when we have the wedding (I know my bio says sept. 2014, but we may potentially have it a year earlier, just can't decide yet), my daughter will be either 8 or 9 years old. She has asked me if she gets to be the flower girl and I said of course, absolutely she gets to be FG.

FI's daughter will be 4 or 5, and so we were going to have both of them be flower girls. We have no young male family members that could be a ring bearer, except for FI's brother's fiancee's son, but they are both pains (the fiancee and her son), and neither of us are keen on having him part of the ceremony.

So, could I have my daughter be the ring bearer, and his daughter the flower girl? I know it's traditional to have a male ring bearer, but I don't really foresee any problem with this arrangement..... ?

Ceremony Order

babyblues21 — Sun, 05 Aug 2012 22:07:26 +0000

I am trying to find some examples of ceremony order and am having trouble finding options online. Does anyone have some old ceremony programs lying around that you could help me out with?

Pink and Orange wedding colors!

daniw413 — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 00:27:18 +0000

I'm looking for ideas on how to also include my fianc. My wedding colors are pink and orange I love bright colors! and I don't want it to come across as being too girly or not having any trace of my fianc. He loves music and he plays the drums. How can I show some of him in the reception? Also, if you have any good ideas for a pink and orange wedding please share! : thanks!

Traveling Guests

bgrjourney — Sun, 05 Aug 2012 15:08:56 +0000

I was hoping to get some advice on a pickle that I just can't seem to get around for our wedding. We have decided to do our reception at one of two NC aquariums on the OBX. The problem is we can't decide which based off of the fact that either a) there isn't enough hotel accomadations around for the guests or b) there isn't a ceremony venue around to accomadate our size.

Basically these two aquariums are within budget and can accomadate the amount of guests we are inviting. One is in a very small town with virtually no hotel accomadations for atleast an hour away and the other doesnt have any ceremony venues around that can or will accomadate our size.

We aren't religious people so we would have prefered not to get married in a church but it seems as though thats going to be something we have to compromise on. Due to the fact that FI isn't baptised of confirmed into any church of any denomination it basically has red flagged us and we were having trouble finding one that would marry us.

My gandmothers church is very understanding of our lack of participation in religion and preferences for the ceremony and have agreed to let us hold our ceremony there (they are big enough for our wedding party!) THe catch is it is an hour and a half away from the reception site and hotel accomadations (the closet one).

I feel guilty asking my guests to travel like that especially since most are coming from NY and CO in the first place. But this is the area we live in! It takes 45 minutes to get to the grocery store and an hour and a half to get to walmart. So for us the drive is typical Im just worried the guests wont see it that way.

I realize there is an option of bussing people but I worry that that might get costly and potentially complicated. I'm just not sure whats appropriate of me to ask of them. We are trying to lock down our bookings for the ceremony and reception sites so we can start paying down the balances and moving forward with the save the dates but Im just in a slump about what to do!

cute/funny vows for my offbeat wedding;

Oaubrey — Fri, 13 Jul 2012 06:58:26 +0000

vows; I vow to always listen to your conspiracy theories, and promise to always turn away before I roll my eyes at them. I vow to be your memory for all the things you tend to forget "remember sammy jenkins", I vow to take care of two babies instead of one when you are sick and ridiculous, I vow to encourage you, be honest with you and love you now and forever. " All my little plans and schemes Lost like some forgotten dream Seems like all i really was doing Was waiting for you " Thoughts/opinions?

Any Regrets?

embm — Sun, 05 Aug 2012 04:20:27 +0000

If you had a private DW/elopemant did you regret it? Did you wish you'd gone the traditional route?

If you had a traditional wedding, do you look back and wish you had just eloped?

How to start and end these vows

jspeed83 — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 05:33:32 +0000

I have written the main part of my vows, but after searching the internet for hours, and I still have no clue to how to start or end them...

Advice????

I love the way that you bring me out of myself, the way you make me feel beautiful everyday, and that in a room full of people, you make me feel that I am the only on there.

I love that you listen to my stories, even when it seems they have no ending, the way you match red, blue, green and black in an outfit, I love the way you kick my butt at scrabble every time, and don’t gloat…too much.

I promise that I will always laugh with you, and never go to bed angry.
I will be with you in times of sorrow, even when the Canucks lose the Stanley cup….again.
I will always reach for your hand while we walk together,
And will find new ways to make you smile.
I promise to always say I love you when I leave the house, even if I slam the door.
I will encourage you, love you, and admire you all the days of our lives.

folding beach chairs

nongermane — Sat, 04 Aug 2012 03:24:16 +0000

Okay, I am having a retro beach themed wedding (think beach party movies). The ceremony is on the beach but instead of regular chairs, I want foldable striped beach chairs. They don't have to be the same color. It appears every chair rental is the same mahogony, white, and black chiavari. Does anyone know of any vendors in Florida OR any ideas of where to find a bulk amount of these damn chairs instead of buying them individually?

Processional Order

hodapps — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 23:12:54 +0000

I personally do not like the idea of having my groomsmen escort my bridesmaids down the aisle. I like the look of the bridesmaids walking down the aisle on their own. I also wanted my Groom to walk his mother down the aisle and seat her then join the officant up front.
now my question should I hvae the bestman walk down after the groom and stand next to the groom up front and have the next groomsmen come down and then stand next to the bestman and so forth. OR should i copy the order of the bridesmaids, have the groomsmen who is standing the furthest from the officiant come down the aisle after the groom and stand the furthest away then have the next groomsmen come down and stand next to the other groomsmen then have the bestman last......cant decide which will be better???

Processional HELP!

alannamha — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 18:37:19 +0000

We have a song that means a lot to us that we want to use for the processional. The only problem is that we have nooo idea how long or short a processional song ought to be (with relation to the side of the bridal party), but "our" song is 5:50. We have 9 bridesmaids and 9 groomsmen. Oh, and the aisle is fairly short... 14-23 steps depending on whether you start from the outer or inner door. Our wedding is Nov 10, so we're hoping for good weather in which case the procession would definitely start from the outer door.

Help?

Ignore. Wanted to delete but the knot won't let me.

JasmineRiveria — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 08:16:15 +0000

Sorry. I posted it a couple other places and some knotties got a little snarky about it so it obviously offended people that I did that. Just ignore it then.

Chuppah

jenniferdyz — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 17:40:09 +0000

Does a chuppah have to be used for a Jewish wedding only? My fiance' and I are having a Christian ceremony but I don't like the traditional round arches. We have a vintage theme and like the way a 4 post chuppah looks with the drapping. Please help!

flowers in your bouquet

shaina925 — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 05:19:06 +0000

I am wondering if you have all the same type of flower or a bunch of different ones? I was going to do a few different but the last few weddings I have seen on TV the brides have all the same type of flower in their bouquets. Just curious as to what yours is like.

Movie Fireproof

skylily — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 00:14:41 +0000

Hello.

My daugther is thinking of having a marriage dedication ceremony exactly like the one at the end of Fireproof. She and my son in law were married at the courthouse. It has been almost two years since they were legally married and now they are taking these marriage classes through their church. My daughter is completely excited about learning to be the wife God wants her to be, and she thinks it would be a great idea to have a "marriage dedication ceremony" as she likes to call it. I personally think its a great idea, but my husband thinks she's crazy. He says she's already married - they can just choose to live a gospel life not through a ceremony. After hearing what her dad said she is backing off and saying forget it. You can tell shes upset that people will think she's stupid, but I think its a great idea and she's showing the world her choice just like baptisms or professions of faith that our church holds.

What do you all think? Is this stupid?

We do for cake table

shaina925 — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 05:15:56 +0000

I know a lot of people do this. I found the letters at Michael's and thought it would be an easy DIY project. My wedding colors are rose petal pink and yellow, so I was thinking I would paint the WE pink and the DO yellow.. or should I just stick to one color, or do every other letter?? After I paint them I was going to put on some rhinestones. I thought it would be a nice touch to the cake table.

Music at the Wedding

sunnie0946 — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 15:15:20 +0000

Which is best live singing at the ceremony or just play music?

My Vows - what do you think?

sbradke — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 19:45:14 +0000

I found these some place on-line, and using basically the same structure I tweaked them a bit.

I, Bride, take you, Groom,
To be the husband of my days, the companion of my house, the friend of my life.
I promise to always treat you kindly in word and deed;
To give myself to you completely;
To be your true and faithful partner;
Bearing together whatever trouble and sorrow life may lay upon us,
as well as sharing all the good and joyful things life will bring.
With these words, and all the words of my heart,I marry you and bind my life to yours.

Need help with a ceremony

klkindy — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 18:45:04 +0000

Help! My fiance and I are not really religious and don't really ascribe to any particular religion. It seems like a lot of civil weddings do "unity candles" or that sand thing - and I just don't like either idea. Has anyone done anything different that they really liked? Or maybe some book/poem that you quoted in the opening/closing remarks?

Wedding change of plans and need opinions please

outerbanks+2012 — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 14:29:22 +0000

My fiance and I had plans to marry at the end of this year in a destination location, just us two with no family or friends. We have since decided we do want our parents, sisters and brothers and our few close friends to attend ( all less than 25 people). We have decided to have a small private wedding ceremony at our house the day before we leave for our trip so the family can be apart of our special day. The question we have now is do we keep the plans we have for the beach location and just change it to a renewal ceremony? We have always wanted to be married on an island, nothing about that has changed. We just want our family to be a part of it. We cant have them all travel with us beause its close to the holidays, we would have to pay for some people to attend and we want to still have our honeymoon and our own private moments just us two together. Would you keep your plans for the pictures and the ceremony at the destination location and just make sure they now its a commitment ceremony, renewal of vowes? Again, the only reason we have decided to have the actual wedding in the states is because we do want our family to be a part of our special day...but we still want to keep our original plans. Its kind of like having the best of both worlds...

Please Help...Colors for Sand Ceramony?

NICOLE7992 — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 18:10:21 +0000

I Just changed the colors of my wedding because my previous colors (Tiffany Blue) were to difficult to do at my venue. Anyway, I chose to do Black, white and accents of red. I now have to rethink my sand ceramony. What colors would you choose? 2 colors only. Red and Black or Black and White or Red and White? Thanks! Will red and white look like a candy cane?

FYI - Living Social Shutterfly Deal (XP)

mamabear329 — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 17:27:12 +0000

LivingSocial has a deal for Shutterfly, and I thought I'd share with my fellow brides! I'm using mine for our guest book w/pics from our engagement session.

One 8x11 Hardcover Photo Book with 20 Pages:

https://www.livingsocial.com/deals/417118?ref=conf-jp&rpi=74311644

The deal is only available for 87 more hours, so scoop it up soon!

Spring colors for a winter wedding?

JessicaLMay — Wed, 01 Aug 2012 19:12:47 +0000

I had the idea to do white and black with peach accents. UNTIL I found out that everyone does't think it's very fittign for my December wedding in the mountains. It bummed me out. My maid of honor said I should do blue or purple to get that winter feel. but I HATE winter, and really loved that the peach would bring that brightness and spring feel. I know it's my day, my wedding, but that totally just ruined my wedding high. What do you think??

Canon in D

UberBiz — Tue, 31 Jul 2012 13:07:45 +0000

I absolutely cannot stand the standard Canon in D (Pachelbel's Canon, etc.), it's so overdone and cliche I don't want it anywhere near my wedding. Unfortunately, my darling fiance LOVES it. Anyone know of any upbeat or campy remakes or covers of this classic? I think I'd be able to tolerate better it if it weren't so stuffy, or classical, (or the version by Transiberian Orchestra, ech!).

Also, when is this usually played? At the beginning when the wedding party comes in before they start "here comes the bride?"

Ring Bearer/Flower Girl

khenrique — Wed, 01 Aug 2012 19:48:47 +0000

Hi girls! I need advice on what to do about my RB and FG. The RB is 2yrs old and the FG is 14 months and just starting to walk. I don't expect either one of them to hold a pillow or a basket but what are some cute alternatives for them walking down the aisle? I've seen the wagon idea and it is SUPER cute but I'm worried the 2yr old might be too young to want to pull the wagon.