Registry and Gift Forum — The Knot Community

Registry

caitgar — Sun, 09 Nov 2014 02:43:55 +0000

Should I register for more than one place? Right now I am registered at Bed Bath & Beyond, since they have everything. Should I do somewhere else as well?

So I've been saying I wouldn't register but...

amelisha — Wed, 05 Nov 2014 19:48:08 +0000

Brace yourselves for the most first-world problem ever...

FMIL is really on my case about a registry. We're having a very small DW and I really don't anticipate gifts from, well, anyone who's attending, but she's claiming that (not invited) extended family want to buy stuff, etc., and is just adamant and was having NONE of my "Well, you know we live in a small apartment and I've been on my own for ten years and we really don't need anything." She is convinced that that's not a suitable answer and that "people" are specifically asking her for a registry and don't want to give cash or buy stuff we don't need...so, okay, FMIL, sure, but I'm kind of at a loss for what to put on the thing.

I'm an avid cook and I already have high-quality kitchen everything and all the gadgets I could need, tons of glassware/entertaining stuff, no room for china, have a bunch of small appliances, etc. So is it going to be really bizarre to have a registry with, like...a couple of vegetable peelers, some silicone baking mats, a few serving dishes, throw pillows, and some new sheets? I have a couple kitchen hand tools that are in need of replacing and I suppose new sheets are always nice, but we really just don't have the space or a big need for anything apart from some random items (new pastry crimper? Replacement whisk for my Kitchenaid?) Is it a faux pas to have just weird odd and ends on a registry and none of the usual stuff like flatware, glasses, towels, pots & pans?

I have no idea how many people are even going to buy us stuff, so I don't even know how much stuff I should put on this thing. I'm so lost.

FAQ for Registering and Gifts

KnotRiley — Wed, 05 Nov 2014 16:40:01 +0000

Some things for you to remember:

1) Lurk first! Take the time to just observe, read posts and get a feel for how things work here before you start posting.

2) We talk about a lot of things, not just wedding related information. Many people actually become friends. That's a good thing, embrace it!

3) Vendors are not welcome. Don't come on here advertising your business.

4) Don't ask a question unless you actually want an answer. You will hear all sides, people who agree with you and people who disagree with you. Be prepared for that. We are a friendly bunch, don't be shy.

5) Google is your friend. Use It. Love it. Also, search through prior posts, there is a good chance someone has just answered a question similar to yours.

6) Don't post ANY personal information. This is a public message board and ANYONE can read this. Personal info includes phone numbers, full name (esp last name), work info.. etc. If your screen name has your full name or email in it, change it. It's for your protection.

Here is the link for the community rules....
http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-tools-help-center/the-knot-about-us/articles/knot-community-rules.aspx

What are some great ideas for gifts to give to the parents of the bride and groom?

hkrenek — Sun, 19 Oct 2014 22:47:25 +0000

Hi,

My fiance and I are having trouble brainstorming on gift ideas for our parents for the wedding. We don't want to do the typical photo framed or poem ideas we keep reading about. What are some unique ideas?

Thanks!!

Beware myregistry.com

KatieinBkln — Fri, 01 Aug 2014 18:45:29 +0000

I went to an old friend's wedding last weekend, which was lovely. As usual, I waited till the day before the wedding to peruse the registry. They had used myregistry.com, a site that allows you to gather items from different retailers and put them all in one place. Handy, right? Wrong. My first tip-off was that it looked like very few things had been purchased. It wasn't a huge registry, so I was surprised since they tend to fill up fast. I shrugged it off and clicked on the link to some wine glasses. Before I was redirected to the store's website, a box popped up with a big warning saying, "Please remember to come back to myregistry.com to mark your gift as purchased!" Um, what? No. Having to come back to the site just to check it off is extra work, but more importantly, it's super weird and highly likely that a less technologically adept person might not know what's going on/would forget to come back. I was worried that lots of things had, in fact, been purchased, but not marked as such! I was actually willing to roll my eyes over that and continue onward. But the kicker was that when you are redirected to the vendor site, none of the defaults (like shipping address/addressee) transfer over. I had to re-enter the address. But of course you can't just copy-paste the address. The vendor sites usually have specific boxes for Name, Street, City, etc. Again, super annoying, but not insurmountable. But then I realized that I would be unable to enter the names: Bride's Name, c/o Mr. and Mrs. GroomsParents because the only option on the site was "First name" and "Last name" boxes. Do I send it to Bride's Name at an address where she does not live? Do I put the Groom's mother's name and hope for the best? Do I enter Bride's Name in the "name" section, then add "c/o Groom's Parents" in the line provided for a longer street address? This was the point where I said, "Screw it" and wrote them a check for $50 rather than buying the $62.50 wine glasses. Moral of the story? Myregistry.com, while it SEEMS cool, is a huge logistical nightmare. I would avoid it! ETA: There were paragraphs, I swear. I SWEAR. So sorry.

4 Stores for Registering?

dragonavicious — Sun, 21 Sep 2014 16:46:14 +0000

Okay so my fiance and I are going to register a little after he gets out of work today. We were going do the cheaper tier at Walmart, the midlevel tier at Meijer (which is a store like Walmart but more expensive in Michigan) then either Bed, Bath and Beyond or Kohls. Well looking at Meijers I realized that they were only in Michigan and also that they don't allow shopping online. Now me and my fiance love the cookware there more then any other store so we really wanted to register but we do have several out of town guests. My mother suggested adding another specialty store, like Pier 1, where we'd only register for a few things like decor and if someone didn't want to shop at BBB or Walmart, and didn't have access to Meijers they could still find something. She also said that my older sister didn't register at enough places and that led to a lot of confusion and irritation from her guests.

What do you think?

Registries???

mikeandsam788 — Wed, 22 Oct 2014 16:01:16 +0000

My fiance and I just booked our hall last night so now we are going to start looking to register at Bed Bath and Beyond and Macys. They sell just about the same things so how do I know which store we should register for which items? Thanks!

Gift dilemma

hellohkb — Mon, 29 Sep 2014 06:24:37 +0000

I'm going to a wedding to a distant relative who I haven't seen in awhile. FH and I have to travel to this wedding and are excited to go. The problem is, I'm having an issue with what to give the couple. I'm in a financial bind and can't really afford to give them $200 cash. Unfortunately I'm having car issues and I have been paying off things for my own wedding.I prefer to give something from the registry but I'm told from relatives that it's an unspoken rule that we have to give cash for the wedding.

What do you think? Is it inappropriate to give a gift off of the registry? Should I give a lesser amount in cash ($150-ish?) The wedding is in the NY/NJ area.I'm farther south where $100 is considered a pretty nice amount, so FH is scratching his head at the amount difference and not being much help.

HELP! IS IT TOO EARLY?

Krideout3 — Wed, 15 Oct 2014 00:29:35 +0000

My fiancé and I have been engaged for almost 2 years now, we planned a long engagement so I will be finished with grad school before the wedding. We really want to register just because it's a fun wedding activity! I know my shower is still a ways away but is it too early to register this weekend? The wedding is Oct 10, 2015. shower will probably be in Aug, of 2015.

Macy's - check your packing slips

photokitty — Tue, 14 Oct 2014 16:43:53 +0000

Friendly reminder- carefully check your packing receipts when you receive registry items in the mail. I sent my friend a gift and Macy's mailed the entirely wrong item in a different pattern. Luckily she mentioned it to me so I could tell her that's not what I gave her. She just assumed I went off registry. When she went back and checked the packing receipt it said the correct item, but obviously a different item was packed and shipped. The correct item was marked as completed on her registry. GL!

Does BBB have a thank-you manager?

Aray82 — Sun, 05 Oct 2014 02:11:57 +0000

I thought it did, but I can't seem to find it! Trying to track down the giver of two mystery gifts at the shower...pretty sure they are from the same person (appetizer plates and a lazy Susan server from the same company/design), and they were wrapped so they were definitely brought by someone rather than shipped to the house in advance. I opened everything from everyone who was there and no one said, "Oh wait, there's more over here!" so I have no idea from whom they could be. I was hoping to get a clue from BBB but no such luck thus far...might have to track it down the old fashioned way. There must be a way to see on the BBB site who purchased what, right? Why can't I find it?

ETA: Or rather I thought I opened everything from everyone who was there...at least everything I saw and that my sisters handed to me...and I wrote TY notes for everyone who was there so if someone gave these additional gifts I'd like to re-do the note and include them before I send them out on Monday. It's strange that I'd miss unopened gifts at a shower, but there ya go! How do I make sure this person gets properly thanked if there's no info online? How do I do this in the fastest and least awkward way possible? TIA!

Honeymoon fund/gift

laurenlozzy — Sun, 05 Oct 2014 19:36:46 +0000

We are travelling to Las Vegas from the uk and having a party to celebrate on our return back home. Our close family are traveling to Las Vegas with us so this won't be much alone time for us newly weds. Instead of a gift list for our guests back in the uk we would like money towards a honeymoon together, do you think this is rude or asking for too much as we are travelling for the wedding? My mum thinks that we cannot ask for this. Thanks for your thoughts x

Macy's

shaker227 — Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:44:18 +0000

We registered at Macys yesterday and when we were finished, they printed out our registry for us. I noticed when we got home that it says on the bottom "B and G prefer to have their gifts shipped to the following address:" and then lists our home address. Is this normal or will people read it as, we would prefer you ship the gifts to us versus bringing them to the shower? Because obviously that's not what we want.

No Registry Question (Wedding and Shower)

canadianhearts — Tue, 30 Sep 2014 17:30:22 +0000

Hello! I have a quick question about registries.

First of all, just to be clear from the start: my FI and I don't EXPECT gifts from any guests. We are grateful they are taking the time to share in our special day with us. That is a given and this post isn't about how to get money vs. gifts or anything of that sort. It stems from the fact that FMIL has asked about our registry plan and I know that we will receive more questions regarding gifts down the road, so I wanted to check in here and see what people have done in this circumstance in order to be prepared and not break any etiquette rules.

My FI and I have been living together for a few years. We have already outfitted our condo to our liking and won't be moving into our first home for another couple of years. While there are some upgrades we could use, we view it as somewhat wasteful to register for things we already have that work just fine (upgrading the vacuum cleaner to a newer model, new cutlery, etc.) We are also short on storage space for things that would be given to us for our future home. Therefore, we were thinking about not having a registry for our wedding.

Is this bad etiquette to not provide the option of a registry? Does this send a message to guests that you're asking for money? This is not our intention. We wouldn't ever dream of doing a Honeyfund or asking for cash.

Also, what do you do regarding a bridal shower since it's more focused on gifts that the bride gets to open (and I have read that in that case it would be rude not to have that option for guests)? But, again, I would find it kind of rude to include wedding-registry items for a bridal shower if you're not having a wedding registry. What do people usually put on there? All the bridal showers I've been to either were or have looked exactly like the couple's wedding registry.

Thank you in advance for your advice.

When to cash checks?

jcmoy241 — Fri, 15 Aug 2014 16:15:26 +0000

So our wedding is in three weeks, and I have recieved a check from a family friend who can not make it to the wedding.. When is the appropriate time to cash the check? Should I wait until after the wedding? Do it now? I know how I feel when someone doesnt cash a check for a long time and then I see it come out of my account, but I also dont want to do it before the wedding if that isnt right! Help!!!

I also ordered my thank you cards that have our new married name on them.. is it weird to send that thank you card before the wedding or am I looking too much into it?

Wedding Registry Dilemma

Knottie09837419 — Sat, 23 Aug 2014 15:27:39 +0000

My fiance and I are planning on moving cross country right around a year after we get married. We would really prefer to have as little as possible to have to ship/move when we leave the state. Is it completely unacceptable to ask for gift cards or cash? We had already planned on only taking the necessities and purchasing new things once we get to our new home state. And having cash either for items or a down payment on a place or gift cards would be waaaay more useful.

Wayfair.com?

kimczys — Thu, 25 Sep 2014 01:57:32 +0000

We are registering at Kohl's and Sears (one place I love and a place he loves). Whatever we don't find at these two places, we thought we'd be able to find online at wayfair.com. Has anyone ever registered there? I can't find any reviews!! It seems like a great place, but I would love some opinions from brides who have registered there. Thanks!!

XP: We're registering tonight!

JCbride2015 — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 15:30:20 +0000

I'm sort of apprehensive about this, but mostly excited. I have found all kinds of checklists of things we should register for, and we're crossing off plenty of stuff that we don't need. And I have paid attention to all the threads about the favorite registry item, which were super helpful. But I have a few questions.

1) Who else has registered at Macy's-- how much does the sales associate actively sell you on stuff? Will we just walk around by ourselves?

2) I already have a set of fine china that was passed down in my family. It's not really our taste, but it's a huge set (12 place settings) and it seems wasteful to register for another set just for style reasons. Do you think this is a smart idea or will we later regret not having "our wedding china?"

3) Can we opt out of the "Dream Fund" or at least move it to the bottom of the page?

Comforter weights?

jellybeann — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 17:24:42 +0000

So I'm thinking of adding a nice comforter to our registry, and I'm not really sure what weight I should get. FI and I live in the south, so it doesn't really get very cold (I grew up in the north so I know what cold is). I think I liked the heft of the medium weight comforter, but I'm worried that it'll be too hot, and that possibly the lightweight one will not be enough for the "winter". I've always had bedsets that came with comforters but FI and I decided on a comforter and duvet cover for the versatility.

Thoughts?

Something Blue - for the groom

billagirly — Fri, 19 Sep 2014 18:31:19 +0000

I thought it would be fun and unique to make my groom's gift items old, new, borrowed and blue - but I'm really struggling with that last one! For old, I got him a bottle of Old Pogue bourbon. New is a leather-bound travel journal for all our travels together as a married couple/family. His family always had travel journals when he was growing up and he has mentioned a few times before how fun it would be to have our own. Borrowed, I'm going to have to borrow his watch in the day or two before the wedding to have a new battery put in. If I do it any sooner, he'll either notice it missing or notice it working! And blue. There's a camping/hiking backpack he really likes that comes in a cool shade of blue, but it's more than I'm able to spend right now. I'm not sure what else I could do, but I'm open to any suggestions for things that are the color blue, have 'blue' in their name/title, or any other way of making it work!

Anyone registered at Bloomingdales?

JenLD2015 — Tue, 23 Sep 2014 14:59:33 +0000

This is where my step-mom wants us to register. It makes sense cause it is national. I''m also thinking Crate and Barrel and Bed Bath and Beyond. How did you guys like these stores?

Registry cards

katie097 — Sun, 21 Sep 2014 02:07:43 +0000

So I registered at Bed Bath and Beyond (which by the way was the most amazing experience) and they gave me cards to send w/ shower invitations.. is it tacky/ rude to send those with Save-the-Date cards as well? Not sure on proper etiquette.

Theft at Reception??

headhurt — Sun, 03 Aug 2014 02:34:18 +0000

I've heard from a couple people that thefts have occurred at wedding receptions...like someone taking cards and gifts from the gift table. This sounds horrible. Isolated incident? Or it more common than we would like to think?

Gift Card Themed Shower

konabb — Wed, 17 Sep 2014 18:20:04 +0000

I am getting married (for the second time, I was much too young the first time), and the MIL wants to throw me a shower (this is her son's first wedding). We both have been on our own for 15+ years and own everything we need. We are however, building a home and it will be completed the month we get married. We thought about what kind of gifts to register for, even thought about garden/yard supply themed shower, garage stuff themed shower, ect.. We're running out of gift ideas. Without hurting her feelings by continuing to decline the offer for a shower, my fiance and I thought about how we could go about a Gift Card Shower - specifically for the store where we'll be buying our large appliances for our new home. We just can't simply register for household things we just don't need!

I saw a great idea on an old thread, gift card themed wedding, but to keep "gift opening" interesting, find the funniest card you can possibly find, and award with door prizes! I would have never thought of this type of shower, but the MOL won't take NO for an answer. Any suggestions on keeping guests interested in this sort of shower. Our family and friends know we are building a home, so I do expect support and understanding!

Removing info from Amazing Registry - please help!!

hoffse — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 13:40:59 +0000

Hi ladies,

If you haven't already, google your name with "wedding registry." A site called Amazing Registry collects all that info, even from registries I have deleted or made private. I'm trying to figure out how to remove my information from this site. When I click on the contact us page there is an option that says, "remove registry." It then tells me to go to the "contact us" page from your registry page, and then click delete. It's not working for me though.

Can anybody figure this out and give me a step by step guide? I think this is super creepy, and I have privacy concerns.

Thanks!

Need ideas: Will be apart 2 years

txbandwife — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 17:36:21 +0000

Hello everyone,

I'm looking for tactful / etiquette-approved ideas for a registry where we really don't "need" anything for the next couple years. Many of my original ideas were "etiquette breaches" so before I proceed, I thought I'd get your ideas.

Long version: I'm in the military and just got stationed away from my fiance (we'll be apart for a couple more years). We decided to go ahead and get married (vice waiting for me to retire and move back) and because we will be apart, I originally wasn't going to register for anything. He has his household, I have mine, and we won't know until we move together what "we" need. I don't want to waste people's time or money buying stuff. Then reading through the posts in this and other wedding sites, I see that you might as well register because people are going to buy gifts whether you want them or not. So I thought of some other ideas: in lieu of gifts, send us a page with your best wedding advice, or send us your favorite books, resources, etc for having a great marriage. Or even registering for travel through sites like honeyfund.

We could just not register, but then he is from the South and apparently you *must* register (smile). I've not decided one way or another and I'm hoping one of you "strangers on the internet" will have some great ideas for registry kinds of things I may not have thought about.

missing prepaid hotel cash

chrispiesmom — Wed, 10 Sep 2014 23:49:04 +0000

Hi guys I have a question. Our wedding was two years ago and a family member got us hotel cash as a gift prepaid.we can't remember what company provided the service and our family member doesn't remember either. they printed it and stuck it in the envelope with the card and now that sheet of paper is missing. Is it lost forever?

First Bridal Shower!

preppybride04 — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 19:07:26 +0000

Hello Everyone!

On Saturday, I am going to my very first bridal shower. I only know the bride and with me being completely shy, I am terrified! The bride is more friends with my fiance and I think it is very sweet of her to invite me

With that all being said...I have NO clue what to buy for her! I was reading different articles of what to buy and I am clueless. I feel a bit odd buying her lingerie so that is out. Any ideas or advice for me? My fiance said to just buy stuff off her registry and bring that.

THANK YOU!

cookware help

cds2015 — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 16:25:57 +0000

Hi Everyone,

I'm having a terrible time deciding what cookware to register for. I love to cook and want something that's durable and easy to clean. My first instinct is to go non-stick, but I also feel that I really only need that in pans (not pots). What cookware does everyone use? Did anyone register for a mixture of non-stick and stainless steal? I am leaning toward Calphalon or All Clad. Any recommendations or help would be great!

Deleting gifts from registry as they are purchased?

hikebikebemerry — Wed, 20 Aug 2014 22:02:44 +0000

We received our wedding gift that was from our registry this past Saturday (thank yous are in the mail!), should I now delete the item from our registry, or just trust that people will see the "purchased" feature.

Part of me wants to just leave it on there so that:

1. I don't know what has been purchased off of my registry

2. I like it when people leave up their registry, even if stuff has been purchased so that I can get a sense of what they are looking for/ personal style

What did other people do?