Registry and Gift Forum — The Knot Community

Gift cards in the registry?

agrisner — Sun, 26 Sep 2010 20:37:55 +0000

We registered at Bed Bath & Beyond today and we noticed that the guy helping us added gift cards to our registry for $100, $50, $20, and $10. Is this tacky? Should we go and remove these from our registry or just keep them on there?

Does a wedding gift have to be a couples' gift?

volz519 — Thu, 27 Jun 2013 00:08:48 +0000

My best friend is getting married and I barely know the fiance. I've met him once, for about 5 minutes. I've known her for my whole life, so she's really more like a big sister than a friend (I'm 18, she's 25). For the gift, I was planning on making her a nice scrapbook with pictures of us through the years and some quotes. I was planning on getting a silver jewelry box from Things Remembered and a big sister/little sister bracelet set (a quality one from Etsy, not the cheap one you had when you were ten). Is it appropriate to get her something but not the fiancé? She knows that I'm a college student without a lot of money to spend so I know she isn't expecting me to drop a lot of money on a gift. My mom and I got them a nice gift from the registry for their shower, and my mom will get another gift for the wedding, and it will be from the both of us. So my gifts will be more of a small, personal add-on rather than an official gift.

WWYD re: Wedding gift for friend

[Deleted User] — Sun, 14 Jul 2013 23:33:01 +0000

Hi, I need some input...My husband's friend just recently got married-it was a second marriage for both so it was small and they only had their family attend(only 15 people total at the wedding). No friends were invited and they never really talked much about their wedding because it was a small affair. My husband and his friends took the groom out for dinner/drinks to celebrate before the wedding. We just found out friends in our mutal circle all gave them a gifts for their wedding-big gifts too like a night at a B&B and a wine tour. Our cash flow is tight right now and I know our friends would never expect a gift but should we send a gift-we are starting to feel bad we didn't give them anything. We don't want to look cheap-we did get them gift for their other life milestones-a house warming gift, they had a baby last year, and we just came back from their daughters first birthday-is a wedding gift necessary?

Honeyfund Contribution, but No Gift

heypulice — Tue, 21 May 2013 00:29:35 +0000

Hello! I'm trying to figure out how to approach the subject with a couple of friends. For our gift registry we setup a Honeyfund. When we opened the presents/cards from our wedding I discovered that a good friend of mine gave me a card, but with no gift, so I assumed she purchased something from the Honeyfund. I checked the Honeyfund and she did not purchase a gift. Another friend did purchase a Honeyfund gift and she was going to give us cash, but we did not receive anything from her the day of the wedding. Since the two people are good friends of mine I have no doubt that they did give me a gift. Any advice on how to approach the subject with the two friends? I want to make sure they understood how to use the Honeyfund and hopefully confirm that the gifts were given and they weren't misplaced!

Gifts before the wedding

Shoefly21 — Sun, 07 Jul 2013 12:46:14 +0000

I was wondering if someone could help me out with proper wedding etiquette. I recently received 2 wedding cards in the mail with a checks, from people that have RSVPd yes to my August 24th wedding. Do I cash the checks and send a thank you now, or wait until after the wedding? I don't want to seem like I am neglecting to send a note by waiting too long, but I also don't feel right taking money before the wedding takes place. Thoughts?

Registry - How do guests know what is already taken?

cmcole4509 — Wed, 19 Jun 2013 16:42:09 +0000

So I'm totally oblivious at this point because I myself have never had any interaction with a registry, and neither has FI. Say for example we have a registry at Bed, Bath and Beyond. How would a guest that is either at a physical store or shopping online know if another guest has already bought a particular item? Do they ask the store attendant/look it up online and it will show as crossed off? If FI and I looked at our registry online would we be able to see what has been bought and what hasn't? I haven't set up any registries yet since we have 10 months to go, but I've started making a list of things we could use and will probably be starting the registering process within the next couple of months. Just curious as to how that process works

Sigh. PB Dinnerware woes.

emeejeeayen — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 20:58:58 +0000

Okay, not really woes.

When we first got engaged (over a year ago), we registered because a few relatives had wanted to get us engagement gifts. They got us casual dinnerware from Pottery Barn (LINK) among other things. At our shower in February they got us another set (so we now have 8 of each piece in the set). We were thrilled.

Two problems:

1) Pottery Barn has a different white set I'm starting to think I would really much prefer (LINK)

2) All of this dinnerware is just sitting at my mom's in CA since I figured we might as well wait until after the wedding in CA to ship all of this to where we live in DC.

Because of the above, would it be crazy nutso to return all the dinnerware in CA, get it put on gift cards, and then re-buy everything in DC? Would I be a horrible person if I bought the dinnerware I like more instead? Would PB even let me do this?

Thanks!

(Also, while we're on the topic of my psychotic-ness: when FI and I got engaged, my dad bought us a Le Cruset purple teapot. I realized afterward it came in turqouise, and I wanted to return it for that color. FI said no, purple looks great. Since then, my parents have bought us a turqouise stand mixer and turqoise Dualit toaster. I am still alarmingly annoyed by the purple teapot, despite my love for it other than the color. Sigh. Thank you for hearing my confession, haha.)

Midwest registery-Iowa

Jdunk2008 — Thu, 30 May 2013 17:58:50 +0000

Hello all! Looking to register for things here soon and curious as to some people's suggestions. Currently live in Iowa. I have access to Target, Kohls, Bed Bath & Beyond. As well as walmart, pottery barn, younkers, dillards etc.
I'm personally partial to target because they have reasonably priced things and people have access to them. However, I personally have never had a good experience with them when shopping for other people because of the difference of items from store to store.

I should also add I want to keep it tiny because we would of course prefer $ for a house as we have lived together for 2 years and have most things.

Suggestions? Thanks so much!

gift you wish you registered for

[Deleted User] — Thu, 09 May 2013 13:02:58 +0000

What's the one or two gifts you didn't register for that, after your wedding you wish you had? Right now I'm playing with the idea of a NICE VACUUM, or artwork instead of other decor.

UponOurStar?

sweetbanesc — Sun, 26 Sep 2010 16:04:29 +0000

Has anyone used UponOurStar.com as a gift registry? Does it work? I can't find any reviews and am afraid of being scammed I haven't found one person who completed and collected their gifts at the end.. Hmmm.... Any help is greatly appreciated!

No one is buying off my registry!

LaurenDerek20310 — Wed, 03 Jul 2013 13:02:21 +0000

My shower is in 11 days and barely anything has been purchased off either of my registries (I am registered at BBB and Macy's). I was told the invitations went out about two weeks ago. Before the invites went out, my mom told me I had to register for more stuff because of how many people were invited to the shower, and yet no one seems to be buying anything once the invites are out. I'm just wondering if anyone had this same experience, and if people do wait until the last minute to buy shower gifts (that's what my fiance tried to tell me). I'm sort of freaking out!

Gift Help!

JMalettas — Sat, 29 Jun 2013 21:21:19 +0000

Happy Saturday ladies!

Is it custom to purchase a gift for the MC? Our MC is a family member of my FI. (Whether that's a factor or not, I don't know). :P If so, does anyone have a few gift ideas?

Also, our photographer is a family friend, (& professional photographer), who has offered to do ALL of our photos as a gift. It will be him & his assistant doing them, and we definitely plan to get them both something as a thank-you! They won't accept a cash gift, so any ideas on something other than that? I have only met with his assistant once, so as far as he goes, it wouldn't be a gift specifically geared towards an interest he may have, as we just don't know him well enough. Any ideas of an appropriate gift, or price range? Should I be getting them both the same gift to be 'equal' or would it matter?

Any suggestions welcome! Xo!

Shower Gift for Hostesses?

Pumpkingal82 — Thu, 20 Jun 2013 18:00:31 +0000

Hello!

My bridal shower is next month and I have six women that are hosting it. Any ideas on creative gifts that I can give without spending too much? I would like to create some kind of basket, but not spend more than $25 per person. Thanks in advance for the suggestions!!

New bride- Need ideas

mariathomaswedding — Wed, 26 Jun 2013 20:01:38 +0000

Hi ladies. I have just decided that my wedding date will be November 15th, 2014. My husband and I are planning on having a large wedding party, and two huge bachelor and bachelorette parties. So, in order to complete this, I'm looking for the perfect gifts and accessories, but I have no idea what to get or what is popular. Can anyone help me out??

Maria

How to not include registry info? Help!!

BlondieBia21 — Mon, 24 Jun 2013 02:35:54 +0000

After researching through these posts, I've learned something I've never known. I did not know that you weren't supposed to include registry information! I can only count one invitation that we did not receive registry info included with the invite. (And everyone thought SHE was doing it wrong, when in reality the way she phrased her reasoning for not wanting the registry was the worst part, foot in mouth moment and a whole different story!) So I must ask as I am learning all of this, how do I properly explain to my MIL who WANTS the registry information with the invitations that it is not something you're supposed to do? I tried to explain it as I didn't want to seem gift grabby (I even through in there that we had just had a baby shower 5 months before our wedding, too. We don't need to advertise that OOOH here we are looking for more gifts!) She is "appalled" that we wouldn't attach the registry information and saying it is a huge inconvenience for people. She is paying for majority of everything (not my choice!!) and is practically demanding that we include the registry info. I explained that we can include it on our wedding website and she says that that is still making people go out of their way when they are just wanting to be generous and that some guests don't even know how to access the internet. (Like, 2 people.) Help!!

gifts ideas for bridal party

DianaMick1215 — Fri, 03 May 2013 01:22:42 +0000

anybody care to share what you & spouse (or spouse to be) got (or are planning to get) for your bridal party?

Universal Registry?

msevaluna — Sun, 02 Jun 2013 16:24:00 +0000

Hey ya'll! I'm having a hard time finding an online registry site that does a good job of presenting the registry, and for gifts once purchased to be slotted as sold, so we don't get duplicates. Ive read registry360 the gues has to CALL customer service if they buy something that isn't on one of their affiliated registries(macy's, CB, etcetera) Does anyone know if this is true, and do you have any recommendations for a site?

Destination Wedding

abclinton — Mon, 24 Jun 2013 01:23:12 +0000

We are planning on doing a small destination wedding (approx. 25 guests). Do we register or because it's destination, is it looked down on?

Shower and wedding gift?

Aray82 — Thu, 20 Jun 2013 06:15:16 +0000

So first, I'm asking this as a guest of many current and future weddings, and because I've gotten several different answers in the past: is it customary to get both a shower and a wedding gift if you attend both events? I've generally only bought wedding gifts because I live so far away from many of my old friends and can only afford to make the trip out for the wedding. My understanding was that the shower made it easier to carry/ put away gifts so that there'd be less stuff to deal with when leaving the wedding reception. However, I've also heard that you should get gifts for whatever events you're attending, and still another opinion that whether you get a gift for the wedding as well depends on how "expensive" or "fancy" your shower gift was. Any thoughts on this? Also, I'm asking as a future bride who does intend to register and whose mom and sisters have hinted that she'll probably be thrown a shower. I've loved attending both baby and bridal showers (for those times when I've actually lived near the bride or mom to be) and I've always appreciated the chance to catch up with old girlfriends and female family members in a more intimate setting than the wedding typically allows for. Some of my close friends, girls who would be invited to my shower if I had one, don't feel the same way about them--instead, they've grumbled about feeling like they have to get two wedding gifts when they received a shower invitation. I honestly had no idea anyone felt like that, and I certainly wouldn't want a friend to think, "Ugh! Now I have to get another gift! " upon opening my shower invitation! If it looks like my folks are planning a shower, should I just decline it so as not to seem gift-grabby? I mean, we could honestly use some household items if guests would like to get a gift, but the celebration with friends and family is really the most important part of the wedding and the shower--I'd just be happy if my friends came to hang out, gifts or no gifts! And if they can't come or just don't feel like coming to a shower, that's fine, too! Anyway. Has anyone else felt like this when being invited to showers?

Was invited to a shower but I don't know the bride?

[Deleted User] — Mon, 24 Jun 2013 14:53:42 +0000

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Wedding Registery Conundrum

GigiR72 — Tue, 28 May 2013 00:03:40 +0000

My fiancee' and I just bought a new house 3 months ago. We plan on getting married this September. We moved from a small apartment to a large 3 bedroom house. We are looking to buy new living room furniture as we have never owned any. We thought about asking for donations towards the furniture at a specific furniture store. How does one word that? Or can we? I am bothered by the idea of just saying "give us money"... I want to make sure they know it is going to something specific if they so choose to do so. We will be registering also at a Bed, Bath and Beyond if they want to buy a specific item instead. If the general consensus here is that it is tacky we will not list it on our website as a option. If there is enough feedback saying it is okay since we are listing specifically where it is going towards then I will list it. My question would be back to how does one word it. We have a backup place to list if we decide against it. I have gotten feedback from personal friends and family on this topic. It is a divided issue so that is why I am turning to this community for assistance. I appreciate any opinions from others in the knot community.

FI doesnt want a registry

Micqs — Sun, 16 Jun 2013 03:35:50 +0000

So, Ive been trying to talk to my FI about registry items. He is flat out against doing a registry and just wants to do a honeymoon registry. I mean I understand his point. We have an established home and not much room. I mentioned to him about donating or selling items and registering for new items so our guests are able to have something to go by if they want to get us a gift. He said he doesnt want new stuff and is just happy. I mentioned to him that some people tend to think honeymoon registries are rude and "cashgrabby". He said then "we'll do a honeymoon registry and if they dont want to do that, they can do whatever". I was like you cant just say that! Ugh.. Men. I think he is scared we will not be able to have a honeymoon. We were recently relocated for his job and while we thought this was going to be a good move financially, we had numerous financial set backs. We burned through our savings and have pretty much nothing left. We're pushing it with our wedding but we'll make do. I told him if we cannot afford it, we dont need to go on a honeymoon right after the wedding. He is just stubborn and hard headed and did not agree. I dont agree with solely doing a honeymoon registry if we even do one and letting guests fend for themselves and buy us whatever. What on earth do I do? Should I just register without him? Suck it up and do what he wants? Not do anything?

Edited: I understand the honeymoon registry isnt for paying for the honeymoon but for helping with it. Just sticking this in here so I dont get reprimanded!

Discovered a great man-gift website!

dancinxqueen324 — Tue, 18 Jun 2013 17:32:00 +0000

I couldn't figure out what to get my Bridesman and someone suggested cufflinks. I know nothing about cufflinks, but he loves to dress up, but I figured I'd give it a shot. I did some research and found a website called frenchcuffed.com where you can upload pics and they'll make custom cufflinks for $20!! Maybe it's just my computer, but I wasn't able to upload a pic to the website. I had to email him the photo I wanted, but it worked out fine! He sent me back a proof and I got them about a week later! I am so stoked to give my friend his WHITNEY HOUSTON CUFFLINKS! Haha, he's going to flip out, and I'm quite proud of my creativity! I absolutely recommend this website. It was a quick and easy process, and the cufflinks seem great! The part covering the photo is plastic, but I don't think they look cheap or fragile. Hope this helps anyone who's stuck! :-)

What is proper?

BlondieBia21 — Mon, 17 Jun 2013 19:32:14 +0000

Hi!

I am wondering what the proper etiquette will be for the situation we are in. My FI is 9 years older than me and has owned a house for 7 years. I have lived on my own since I was 18. (I am 22 now) Since we have been on our own, we have pretty much everything we need for our house. We've came up with a total of 6 things that we need. Everything we have is relatively new, as well. Should we just register for the things we have and replace them? Many people have mentioned doing a honeymoon registry, but I just don't know how I feel about that! I WILL NOT just ask people for money, because that's just not okay to do. Does anyone have any suggestions on what to do for this situation? We also do not have a basement or any storage area so that limits our possibilities a lot as well. Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated! Thanks!

When to Register

[Deleted User] — Sat, 15 Jun 2013 15:40:06 +0000

My fiance and I are old fashion and don't plan to move in together until we are married. We are going to find a place together a few months before the wedding. The dilemma is when to register. I know that we probably won't have the apartment until after I've sent the invitations out so I will have to register before that . However, I feel as though it would be difficult to register for things without really knowing how the place will look and what would look best there. Any suggestions?

No registry...just money. Living abroad and getting married in the states.

sdwarshaw — Sat, 08 Jun 2013 07:30:30 +0000

My fiance and I live in Israel and plan on getting married in Texas in April. Our problem is that since we live in a different country than where we are marrying we are not sure how to say in a polite way that we cannot take gifts and prefer monetary presents. We also cannot accept gifts being sent to us in Israel since we would be the ones footing the bill for the customs tax which can get out of hand fast! So... my question is.. is there a polite way of explaining on our wedding website and invitations we will not be having a registry? Also, has anyone done something like this before and would be willing to share their experience with us?

Thank you!

Parent's gifts

bneum12 — Mon, 17 Jun 2013 13:50:52 +0000

I am trying to think of a gift to get my parents to thank them for my wedding. I was thinking about a vacation but don't know when they would be able to go. Does anyone know if there is a way to get like a gift certificate for a vacation and then they can book it themselves? Any other parent gift ideas are welcome.

Where are/were your favorite places to register?

CassidyWess — Mon, 06 May 2013 03:40:20 +0000

My fiance and I are going to start scanning our wedding registry this week and so I was just curious where everyone's favorite place to register is? I'm really excited about Williams-Sonoma and Target. :)

just finished our registries

hyechica81 — Thu, 13 Jun 2013 02:10:41 +0000

so we just finshed our registeries had an event at macys but we did not win anything did most of the registry there plus some of the high end appliances like the kitchenade stand mixer has a better regular price at macys than bed bath and beyond. we did have a registry at bed bath and beyond with items that we wanted from them. it also gives our guest choices if there is no macys near them or no bed bath and beyond we have a lot of out of state guests.

Groom has asked me for an idea of what to buy his bride as a wedding gift.

theycallmejen — Fri, 07 Jun 2013 14:57:47 +0000

Do people really do this?! Like their ring, love, life isn't enough??

What are some material things that grooms give to brides on wedding night?