October 2012 Weddings — The Knot Community

Can I See Your....

amandaorgan — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 19:16:27 +0000

Must Have Pictures list? I am meeting with our photographer today - and although I have been googling it a little bit here and there, I feel more comfortable getting this kind of feedback from a real person. Anyone willing to share theirs?

Thanks ladies!!

Delegation has begun!

violakat03 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 17:43:36 +0000

Up until now, I've done almost all my planning. I'm to the point where I think my to-do list is more than I can do in 2 1/2 weeks, and since my BMs (and other friends) are constantly asking how they can help, I've decided to relinquish my control-freak ways and start delegating.

I posted a big huge list of things that aren't done yet on to Google Docs and am sharing it with anyone who offers to help. Then they can go in and edit it, add comments, "claim" tasks that they'll take care of, and note what they've gotten done. So far all the girls are loving the idea! The only person I'm having problems with is my mom, who is constantly asking "wait, I thought you had this done?" which is totally not helpful. :\

Anyone else gotten to the point where they're ready to hand off everything for someone else to worry about?

WHAT!? Three weekends left?!?

mrskristinyc — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 03:08:10 +0000

I just looked at a calendar to start to figure out what final wedding-related appointments I could schedule on what days (haircut, dog vet/groom, FI's haircut, nails/waxing).

There are THREE weekends until October 13.

THREE.

We're leaving on Tuesday the 9th. My counter says 26 days,,,, I just thought I had more time. Wow.

Wedding Dates/Brides

fishinflagrl — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 22:45:14 +0000

Updated again. :)

Review my vows please

ccarrion77 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 14:42:47 +0000

Morning Ladies,

I'd like honest opinions on my vows, please shred them to pieces if necessary. We're reading our own vows to each other on the first night of the honeymoon since I'd never make it through them at the ceremony.
Not sure why the spacing is messed up half way down.
TIA

FI,

From the first time I saw you, in your cartoon man outfit of a black shirt and jeans when everyone else was in a suits or uniforms, I knew I wanted you. That want grew into admiration and love. Today I love you more than I ever knew was possible to love.

Ben, you are the best part of everyday. You are the reason I smile each day, and when I look into your eyes I see forever.

So I promise to cuddle with you every night

I vow to let you tickle me at least once in a while

I pledge to be silly and corny to make you smile

I promise to be honest and true to you

I vow to always choose you and put your first

I pledge to always be your friend

I promise to ask for help when I need it

I vow to always treasure and spoil you

I pledge to always know that I am the luckiest woman in the world

But most of all, I promise, I vow, I pledge to love you, under any circumstances, happy or sad, easy or difficult, through the sunshine and through the rain for the rest of my days.

(nwr) ARRRGGHHHH!!!

lv2011 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 01:32:30 +0000

I am at my wits end with one of my cats. I don't know when she learned it, I don't know where she learned it, I don't know how she learrned it, but for the 3rd time in a WEEK she has thrown her weight against the screen door in order to make a hole in it for her to escape onto the balcony. At the moment, she's been banished to a bathroom with her litterbox and food/water dish. I just don't get it. We have two screen doors/ two balconies, and she's only forcing the hole in one. I kid you not, we've replaced the screen with a brand new screen 3x in a week and she's never done it before.

I'm going to duct tape a large piece of cardboard across the bottom 1ft of it, but I don't think that will teach her anything. Any suggestions?

Checks to Mr. and Mrs. New Last Name

lehc723 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 10:57:41 +0000

Hi Knotties,

I know this has been covered in threads about gift-giving, but I still get confused, and thought I'd ask for a bit of clarification.

FI and I got a check to Mr. & Mrs. New Last Name (his current last name, obviously). I know I can't deposit this check, but if we share a checking account under both of our current names (so my full name and his full name, which the check is made out to partially), can he deposit it? Or no?

So confusing!

QOTD 9/18

minionlover — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 13:13:27 +0000

Do you and FI have any traditions? If so, what are they? If not, do you plan on starting any?

Bachelorette Party Bus - song suggestions?!

kd1986 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 10:18:58 +0000

Girls I need your help! My bachelorette party is this Saturday and we're trying to come up with a great playlist for the bus :) If you have any song suggestions please send them my way - we like to dance!

Hair Help!

KittennDave — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 15:26:48 +0000

So I have long hair (down to the middle of my back) and my hairdresser will be doing some big waves in my hair, so nice and flowy (she calls them 'beach waves'), so something soft and natural, I usually wear my hair braided so this'll be a nice change. My question is I'm doing an elbow length veil so I'm not sure what to suggest for making sure it stays in, do we need to pin it? I don't really want to do a half up do, but I'm not sure how to keep it in place! Also not sure what to do to add a little sparkle because I'll be taking the veil off for the ceremony, so I'd like to have something in my hair after it's off and we won't have time to add anything extra inbetween the ceremony and reception, so it has to be there from the beginning.

I like the looks of these and I'm going for something similar, just don't know how to pull it off for what kind of hair accessory to look for with it (hair band, tiara, comb, ect)
http://weddings.theknot.com/Real-Weddings/49731/detailview.aspx?type=3&id=49731
http://www.theknot.com/gallery/bridal-accessories/veils-of-art/ve161

Thoughts? Hellllllllp!

Jewelry is done! PIP

violakat03 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 08:51:27 +0000

I decided to DIY my jewelry along with my BMs' jewelry. Finished them up tonight - I went a lot simpler than I originally intended but I think in this case simple works perfectly.

All the necklaces and earrings.

BM necklace - flower cameo in ivory and black with antique gold.

My necklace - pale grey and dark grey cameo with antique silver.

BM earrings - red crystal with pearl white sead beeds on antique gold.

My earrings (obviously not DIY) - cubic zirconia teardrops.

Nermal being adorably annoyed that I wouldn't let him play with the ribbons.

I bought the ribbon necklaces from a flea market, the BM cameos came from Joann, and my cameo came from one of those cheap Chinese jewelry stores in Gatlinburg. The stuff for the BM earrings came from my stash and my earrings were bought from Claire's. Total investment for 5 necklaces, 4 sets of DIY earrings and my store-bought earrings: $29

Wedding spa day booked!

amyelise25 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 15:52:55 +0000

I'm so excited! I just finalized the appointments for my sister (MOH) and I to get manis, pedis, and massages! The spa has this tranquility room that you can hang out in before/between appointments. This room is amazing.

After we are finished we are taking her daughters (flower girl and junior bridesmaid) to their own little girl spa to get manis, pedis, and facials. It'll be such a fun day!!

Couples Shower = So Much Fun!

ashhernandez — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 18:13:04 +0000

The guys were hesitant going into it, but it was a success. I heard stories of how difficult some people were being in planning, but everything seemed seamless to us! I was so thrilled to see everyone come out and we were gifted our two major presents--calphalon pot set & our bedding!!!

Hair trial PIP

mmmendi — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 01:51:36 +0000

She will bring hair 'stuff', she is concerned it's too fine to hold. The curl is natural, so it's just putting it up, shouldn't take long :) ETA maybe it's working lol

Opinions Please

Alisha9544 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 15:15:02 +0000

Ok my Flowergirls. They are wearing DB horizion blue dresses

And the sash is DB tangerine orange. The sash is a big bow at the back

Would a headband with a big orange bow be too much? My FI oldest daughter (both his daughters are our flowergirls) Loves Big hair accessories & she saw a big bow headband & said she liked that. I just keep trying to picture it & can't decide if it'll be too much or not.

headband kinda like this

ready to cancel my bachelorette party

aro1589 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 00:39:21 +0000

Sorry if this gets long...I'm so upset right now.

I live in Pittsburgh but I am originally from NE Ohio (wedding is there)....90 miles away. One BM lives here, 4 are back home in Ohio, and 1 is in Chicago.

My sister from back home asked if I wanted to have my bachelorette party back home or in Pittsburgh. I said Pittsburgh because it's like 4543 times more fun than the small farm town I'm from. I figured I make SO SOOO many trips home to work on wedding stuff, my girls could come to me for one night so I didn't have to make the drive.

Well, guess not. My sister in Chicago obviously couldn't come. I 100% understand. but my MOH and my aunt (who is a BM) aren't coming either. They live back home (90 miles). So, that's half my bridesmaids who can't come. My local Pittsburgh bridesmaid doesn't want to stay in the hotel. So, that leaves only 4 people staying in the hotel (sister, other bm, me, and my sisters friend who I'm close to). Split 3 ways (I wouldn't be paying) the hotel is going to be too expensive for my sister (who planned the whole party and is the only one who is acting like she gives a sh/t).

I am so beyond fed up with my bridesmaids. they have whined and complained about everything from the dress (super affordable) to having to have their shoes dyed to match (REALLY?!) and all they do is remind me how expensive it is for them. I get it - being in a wedding is expensive. you know what's more expensive?! HAVING A WEDDING.

I work 3 days a week in a bakery for min. wage. They all have full time jobs and make far more than me. FI and I saved for years for this wedding and are literally spending everything we have on it. So, I don't really have any sympathy for them. if they couldn't afford it, they should have said 'no when I asked (or never have just PUT THEMSELVES IN THE WEDDING which is what my pittsburgh BM did. she just assumed she was in the wedding and eventually it went on so long w/o me saying anything, she just was in the wedding)

I'm ready to just cancel the stupid b-party. It's not really going to be much of a party if 1/2 of BMs (including the MOH) can't come and if we have to come back to my shitty little 1 bedroom apartment (where my FI will be) and sleep on the floor. I'll pass.

UGH SO MAD. End of pity party though. it is what it is.

Anyone else not going on a honeymoon?

geieran — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 20:25:45 +0000

F and I talked about it and we just don't have the extra money to go on a honeymoon. We have some savings, but not enough. We can't bring ourselves to spend it on something like that when an emergency could arise later.

I have a couple of questions. 1- Is there anyone else in the same boat? 2- Does anyone have any other suggestions?

Little help please?

Blambert01022010 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 01:20:25 +0000

I can't help but see everyone has a weebly. It says its suppose to be free, but it wont let me publish anything? Am I doing something wrong or got information wrong?

confusion!

insanityofamom — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 01:35:39 +0000

So, last week we met with our ceremony musician and picked out some pieces of music. She said she would email them to me, but she also said she needed our reading selections. I assumed she would email me first (cause I gave her my email address...) and then I would email her our selections.... Well, she said it would be here by Sunday and no email. :( Now I am worried she thinks I am supposed to email her.

And I think I lost the paperwork for the marriage license. I want to pick that up on Friday because we have to drive 45-min to pick it up so Friday works best for us..... but I think I lost it in the move. (UM...???!)

I have a head cold so everything is fuzzy and I'm cranky.

show me your...

catwine — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 18:14:40 +0000

table numbers!!

Bridesmaids hair?

Elaina1012 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 02:31:02 +0000

Are you having a flower in the bridesmaids hair? I found some nice ones on Etsy.com but undecided if the bridesmaids need anything in their hair. Im not wearing a flower between the tiara and veil. Im good on having anything else in my hair.

Frustrated, Vent

RockstarWifey0912 — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 19:06:44 +0000

So I have this old friend (M) and her parents. We've been friends since forever, almost 15 years of our lives. We had a minor falling out when I had my son in November 2009 and then a MAJOR falling out early in 2011. Things are stiff between us, I can be cordial around her, but really- things are not the same. I did not send her a save the date card but in the initial stages of planning, she and her parents were on the guest list. After we made final cuts and things, they were taken off (ultimately because on our big day, neither FI or myself want to be around her.)

Today I get a text, asking me details and such- things that she would have gotten in an invite. I know that I should ultimately respond with "Due to budget restraints, we weren't able to invite everyone we would have liked. However, FI and I are continuing the celebration the next night at the haunted houses and the landing." BUT this sounds so fake. What I really want to say to her is "You lied to me for 4 years, what makes you think I want you there?" but my Momma raised me to at least be polite...

Sorry ladies. I'm just done with the details and ready to be married. People are frustrating me.

BM gifts - too cheap? PIP - opinions??

aro1589 — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 18:38:49 +0000

Hi guys!

I picked up my BM gifts today..but I feel like my gifts aren't enough/are too cheap.

I had all these super cute idea of monogramed oversized men's shirts to get ready in, personalized tumblers, bath & body works goodies, etc. but I have 6 BM and am already wayyy over budget (aren't we all).

And to be honest (hope this doesn't sound bratty) my girls haven't really done anything. I KNOW all they have to do is buy a dress and show up, but it still sucks when they can't show up the my shower or bachelorette party. They never ask about the wedding, offer to help, or even act that interested in being in touch with me at all. So, because of my hurt feelings, I guess I didn't feel the need to go overboard.

I got them each a candle and a picture frame. I'm going to put a nice picture of me and each BM in the frames.

My two sisters are BMs. My sister Ashley has done so so SO MUCH (planned the entire shower/paid for 80% of it, planned the entire b-party, helped me print invitations, offers to help all the time - WAYYY more than my MOH who has done almost nothing) and my other sister would undoubtedly do more but she lives in Chicago. I thought I would give them each a $10 gift card in addition to the candle and picture.

I just feel so cheap. What do you guys think? Is this too small of a gift? Would you be disappointed if you got this? If I didn't have 6 BM, I would have loved to have gotten them much more. but gifts x 6 really adds up. I didn't factor BM gifts into my budget nor did I think about gifts when I asked six girls to be in my wedding.

honest opinions?

Another productive day

samanthaeisner — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 02:27:43 +0000

I didn't have to work today thanks to Rosh Hashana and I got more done than I planned! We got our marriage license so we can officially get married as of 1:23 tomorrow afternoon :)

I had my floral sample and I loved it. One flower wasn't in season yet so the florist used a subsitution for today and I loved it. He put an orange gerber daisy in place of a flame dahlia. It looked so much more fun and festive that I decided to use the gerber daisy instead.

After that I went to the limo place to pay my balance and give pick up locations.

I made a spread sheet for the table assignments once I assign numbers to each guest. FMIL did her side of the seating assignments already so I did mine. I have to make a few adjustments, but it seems pretty set. At one point I had a table of 6 and a table of 7 and no way to combine them or place these guests elsewhere. It was frustrating, but I think my mom fixed it. We have tables of 10, they said you can squeeze 11 but no more than that. It was more difficult than I planned. Next will be dropping escort cards at the calligrapher later in the week.

The only other thing that I planned to do is write thank yous for wedding gifts that were sent with declines and for a few shower gifts of people who couldn't attend (I'm really embarassed, one gift I've had for over a month.)

My one wedding gripe of the day: I invited everyone with a guest because I didn't like to not be invited with a guest when I was single. I was in a sorority in college (which through 2 of my sisters met my FI, as he is their sister). I am still close with my big sister and I pledged with her blood sister. My big sister was invited to the wedding, her sister was not. My big sister was too busy to mail in her RSVP but texted me on Friday that it was in the mail, our deadline was Thursday. I received it today and she is coming with a guest, I am pretty sure her sister. I got along with her sister in college but we were never "friends". I didn't invite her to my wedding and don't really want her there. I know you can't control the guest you guests bring, but isn't that common sense to not bring someone who isn't invited to the wedding? I tried to be sneaky and texted her asking the name of her guest for escort cards, but she hasn't responded. My sneakiness will look like a true inquiry at the wedding because no one has "& guest," everyone, except her, responded with their guests' name.

I was trying to think of things I need to do and I honestly can't think of much more that needs to be done before the wedding. I think I'm done.

QOTD 9/17

minionlover — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 13:45:03 +0000

What are your most irrational WR and NWR fears?

Awesome weekend, Monday stress!!

violakat03 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 01:33:21 +0000

Well, I was feeling really good about thing after this weekend. FI's family offered to take care of a lot of stuff for me that really took my mind off things, all the BM dresses are in, and most of the GMs are fitted for their tuxes. I spent the entire weekend with my MOH (my SIL) and my family, had my bridal shower/bachelorette party, and celebrated my nephew's 3rd birthday with him.

Friday night, MOH and I went to Cedar Point (her first trip there) and the park was empty so we got to ride tons of stuff, plus I got to see a lot of friends I hadn't seen in a while. Saturday night, we had the shower/party, which my awesome MOH arranged. We had it at a laser tag place and got to play two private games which were an absolute blast even though only 10 people showed up.

Then tonight, FI talked to his mom about some stuff that his side of the family was supposed to be taking care of for us: cake, catering, officiant and rental chairs. It was bad news on bad news on bad news!!

FMIL has a friend of a friend who offered to do our cake for us, but today we found out she only wants to do it if we want a traditional cake in our colors. I have a specific wish for my cake and if she isn't willing to do it I'm going to make it myself. It looks like that's what I'm going to be doing. I don't care if that's being selfish but even if the cake is free I'd rather have what I want.

FMIL is also handling our catering. She keeps trying to cut the menu down to the point where we basically are feeding them snacks. Not going to fly.

FI's aunt works with a justice of the peace that offered to do our ceremony for us. When we talked to her to set up a meeting to plan the ceremony, she realized she'd double-booked herself for that day and backed out. So we're back to square one on the officiant with less than 3 weeks to go.

FBIL called to get a quote on rental chairs and the only really nearby place that rents them was literally 3 times the price we were expecting. So we're having to search elsewhere. FI has a cousin that's the fire chief in a nearby town and offered to let us borrow chairs from his station, but they only have 38 of them ... that will only seat half the people we know are coming and less than a third of how many we are exepecting!! FMIL argued with FI over that, claiming that we can use those for the people who "need" them and everyone else can just stand. YEAH RIGHT.

Needless to say, everytime FI talks to his mom, it's just bad news on bad news and having to fight with her over how she wants things done (which is usually rude, uncouth, and inappropriate) versus how we want things done.

Argh. Rant over. I want to go back to Sunday night when things were all happiness and sunshine.

FYI cashing checks after wedding

kimm260 — Sun, 16 Sep 2012 17:32:00 +0000

So yesterday FI and I went to the bank to make a deposit and the teller recognized FI and I from our wedding announcement that had been in the paper that morning (we felt like celebrities, lol). Anyways, she said that when we get checks for the wedding with my married name on it from guests, that I should endorse the check with my maiden name and then my married name because my account is in my maiden name.

If you haven't thought of this, you might want to check with your bank to see what their policies are.

Does any one else wish...

thale0924 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 00:46:53 +0000

That the day was here?

I woke up this morning with a feeling that I just wish this Saturday was our wedding!! I'm ready for all the planning and roller coaster of emotion to be over! lol Our orginal date was Sept 28th, which I grabbed the 13th as soon as it opened up at my venue because it's the only Sat they had open until Feb 2013 (I booked this in Oct. 2011) Buuuut I wish my date was only 11 days away.

Soon enough...right?

Cake Question

kjerl — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 15:00:35 +0000

So, we never really got an estimate from our baker. I've tried to get an estimate, but she doesn't seem to be able to give me one.

I'm curious if she hasn't been able to provide one yet since we don't have an exact number of guests. Did anyone have an estimate or final cake cost without exact numbers? I feel like I should finalize this soon!

Thank You Note question

RockstarWifey0912 — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 21:28:27 +0000

We got more presents today in the mail. I've never been so happy to see the UPS guy :)

They were from FI's aunt, uncle, and 2 cousins. 3 separate addresses. Should I send separate thank you notes? I'm not sure that the cousins were involved in picking things out- I just know that on 2 of the gifts it said, "Congratulations! Love, Aunt, Uncle, Cousin 1, and Cousin 2." and on the other 2 it just said from Aunt and Uncle.

So.... To be safe, I should send separate thank yous right?