Vaguebooking

Blergbot

So this girl I know from college just changed her relationship status to "in a complicated relationship with So-and-So" on FB. If that weren't vaguebooky enough, a lady with the same last name as So-and-so (i.e. his own mother or aunt or something!) posted: ?, and this girl answers "it's complicated..." Really? For Realz?! You are FB friends with this guy's mom, you change your relationship status so everyone, including her, can see, and then you vague it up even more? I mean, I don't know what went on behind the scenes, and he could totally be in the wrong, but it just makes her seem crazy.

Angusaur

I personally think even using the "In a complicated relationship" status is immature and annoying. To me it screams out to the world look at us! we're having problems in our relationship! Nobody needs to know but you, and your s/o. And whatever close friends and family you want to confide in. Keep your dirty laundry in your hampers, not on facebook.

Blergbot

Agreed. I don't even have my relationship status up there, for fear of having to change it someday for all to see.

JennyColada

I hate anytime people refer to their relationship as "complicated": it's never as complicated as they want to believe.

Oh you like Johnny and you two get along and have sex but he's not ready for a commitment? Not in a relationship. Not complicated.
You're rebounding from your ex but like Johnny and want to date him in the future? Not in a relationship. Not complicated.
Etc. etc.

FiancB

I haven't seen the "it's complicated" thing so much but I definitely have a couple vaguebookers on my feed. One just posted "so hurt and disgusted right now!" followed by the obligatory friends' comments "???" with no answer. OK you obviously desperately want people to ask you what's wrong so you might as well tell them!

There's one girl that FI knew from grad school that is so ridiculous we check in on her for fun. You would never guess from her posts that she's almost 30. It's a lot of "going to the gym, yay!" quickly followed by "going to the bar with the girlies, yay!" quickly followed by "why doesn't anyone love me? "

HisGirlFriday13

I didn't have my relationship status on FB until DH and I were engaged, in part because I didn't like over-sharing.

I went through my FB news feed the other day and hid all the vague-bookers. They drive me crazy.

The 'It's complicated' option should be removed. No one's relationship is as complicated as they think it is.

FiancB

"it's complicated" means either you're not in a relationship but wish you were, or you're in a relationship but wish you weren't. 

JennyColada

FiancB said:

"it's complicated" means either you're not in a relationship but wish you were, or you're in a relationship but wish you weren't. 

You win.

KytchynWitche

I always thought the "it's complicated" option was Facebook's nod to poly/open etc. But apparently that's not how it's used, so it should probably be removed. I guess maybe it made sense when it was a "college" site? Student drama lols, perhaps? Iunno.

Anyway, vaguebooking seriously gets up my crack. Either share what you wanna talk about, or don't. Enough with the wishy-washy crap.

APDSS22

I always assumed it meant they were fuck buddies but that might just be the people I know who have used the option.  You know, to PG it up for their moms and grandmas who are also on FB.

JennyColada

urbaneca said:

I always thought the "it's complicated" option was Facebook's nod to poly/open etc. But apparently that's not how it's used, so it should probably be removed. I guess maybe it made sense when it was a "college" site? Student drama lols, perhaps? Iunno.

Anyway, vaguebooking seriously gets up my crack. Either share what you wanna talk about, or don't. Enough with the wishy-washy crap.

FB has an "in an open relationship" option!

KytchynWitche

Jennycolada said:

I always thought the "it's complicated" option was Facebook's nod to poly/open etc. But apparently that's not how it's used, so it should probably be removed. I guess maybe it made sense when it was a "college" site? Student drama lols, perhaps? Iunno.

Anyway, vaguebooking seriously gets up my crack. Either share what you wanna talk about, or don't. Enough with the wishy-washy crap.

FB has an "in an open relationship" option!

I did not know that. Which is pretty sad, for someone who spends as much time online as I do. I don't think I've ever used any of the options other than "in a relationship" and "engaged".

mbross3

BF is one of the last remaining people on earth who has never had a Facebook account. I waffle between this being a really good thing and it being annoying (since he never says no to stalking friends on MY fb account! lol).

JennyColada

mbross3 said:

BF is one of the last remaining people on earth who has never had a Facebook account. I waffle between this being a really good thing and it being annoying (since he never says no to stalking friends on MY fb account! lol).

Fi didn't have one either!

I made him create one the day after we got engaged because "I WILL NOT be engaged to no one!"

I think he's signed on all of twice since we created it in December.

Blergbot

FI has one, but he RARELY uses it, and I'm not allowed to post pics of him or tag him in anything. I'm just engaged...to no one in particular

KPBM89

Saw this gem on FB a few days ago:

Status from Guy (in relationship with Girl): "Wish things could be different so sad right now"

Status from Girl (1.5 hours later): "If you want things to be different, just say so"

Girl changes relationship status to "it's complicated"

Comments on relationship change: Friend 1: ":/" Friend 2: "Sorry girly!  Things will work out!" Friend 3: "Oh no!  What happened (Girl)????" Guy: "Um what?  Call me!" Girl: "Your status says it all!!!!" Guy: "That status was about putting my cat down..."

Girl changes status back to "in a relationship"

Blergbot

Sounds like they have great communication!

HisGirlFriday13

Oh holy hell, @hoppersgirl. That's both hilarious and fucked up.

smalfrie19

Pretty sure my mom had her status as "its complicated" with my step dad..since they are in the middle of getting a divorce...sometimes my mom makes me headdesk.... 

monkeysip

Geez I hate vague booking too.  First, because it's annoying.  Second, because I'm NOSY and want to know what's going on.

I had a guy friend on Facebook who used to ALWAYS vague book depressing or creepy statements.  It would either be a melancholic "Why don't people like me" kind of statement, or it'd be statements about women he had a crush on.  For example, one day he posted something like, "I always see you at mass, and you're so beautiful.  I want to talk to you one day."  UGH.  You are NEVER going to get girls with creepy Facebook statements like that.

(BTW--I don't even live in the same state, so I didn't have to worry about it being about me, lol)

AddieCake

I confess  I sometimes deliberately vaguebook to make people wonder if my status is about them. My most recent faves:

"Yes, I'm judging you" and "I wish you would just shut the fuck up." 

AprilH81

My cousin does this all the time and it annoys the crap out of me.  "You don't know my life so you can't judge."  "Ugg...  That is all" and all the other standard stuff.

She does it for the attention just like the constant "I love my life and my boys!" posts that she does.  Yes, she loves her kids but sometimes I think she says that to convince herself.

phira

hoppersgirl25 said:

Saw this gem on FB a few days ago:

Status from Guy (in relationship with Girl): "Wish things could be different so sad right now"

Status from Girl (1.5 hours later): "If you want things to be different, just say so"

Girl changes relationship status to "it's complicated"

Comments on relationship change: Friend 1: ":/" Friend 2: "Sorry girly!  Things will work out!" Friend 3: "Oh no!  What happened (Girl)????" Guy: "Um what?  Call me!" Girl: "Your status says it all!!!!" Guy: "That status was about putting my cat down..."

Girl changes status back to "in a relationship"

Ahahahaha that's terrible.

I always assumed "It's complicated" was a joke thing. I don't know if you can still put in whatever you want for your significant other, but for a while, my friends had statuses like, "It's complicated with pizza" or similar.

Cookie Pusher

Years before FI had Facebook and before I really used it for professional networking (back when you could make your profile impossible to look up by anyone you weren't already friends with), one of my closest female friends and I were "it's complicated". Because Facebook didn't have the option of "we're going to be old spinsters together if our relationships don't work out". Aah, the weird things we did in our 20s!

jenajjthr

I do have a positive for "it's complicated" I left my ex-husband of 18 years due to his abuse and controlling narcissistic behavior. At the time the choices were limited..and I didn't want it to stay "married." I wasn't divorced yet, and didn't put single because that felt wrong too. I got a friend request from a high school friend's SO. He asked what "it's complicated" meant because he was curious. After I explained I asked about my friend. He let me know they got married, had two kids, but that she passed away about 4 months prior. He basically started his FB page to reach out to people he knew from high school. He remembered hanging out with me and ex a few times, knew we got married, wanted to know what happened.

We started out friends, both dealing with a loss. He then asked me out, and it kept going. We are now married. I don't know if we would have come together without that status change.

AlexisA01

I always look at it for the infamous "we are on a break" from FRIENDS.

phira

@AlexisA01

"Oh my god, if you said that again, I'm going to break up with you!"

AlexisA01

phira said:

@AlexisA01

"Oh my god, if you said that again, I'm going to break up with you!"

Exactly!

MollyandD

I had to hide some girls from my news feed, or give up my sanity. One, they are sisters, would change her relationship status from single to engaged to single again every few hours. Then she would be "over guys" and want to focus on her son. Then, an hour later, she would be "so happy to be engaged to a great man who is so good to her" until he broke her heart again that night. Now she's pregnant with her second baby and can't wait to be married. By the way, she turned 17 a month or two ago. It's too much for me.

doeydo

flyingfoxes

Vaguebooking drives me BSC.  I have a FB friend who does it, and one time I commented on somebody else's status that it drove me crazy, and she said "well, sometimes you just have to".  Uh - NO YOU DON'T.  Ugh